Transcript 1-2

Transcript – 01-02

========== 0:00 to 3:16 ==========

Exterior (nighttime):

Lightning strikes above a building - the electric sign on the front of the building comes on briefly: "Bemins".



A strange sarcophagus-like cryo-cabinet sits, seemingly forgotten. Suddenly the red light on the front flickers and goes out. Another light on the side follows suit and the cryo-cabinet starts defrosting.


Lights come on and 2 workers – Gomez (from Bemins) and Stenker (from the Department of Water and Power) – start searching, their flashlights on.

GOMEZ: Guess they don’t like us poking around in his old stuff, ya know? I mean, usually, I gotta get a permit from ‘em just to open this floor up. They say a guy got lost in here back in thirty-seven. Just disappeared when he was loading some stuff in. Wouldn’t want to find him, huh?

STENKER: [gives a scoffing laugh] The only thing I wanna know is what on this floor is pulling all that juice.


The cryo-cabinet shakes and its lock pops open. A rat looks on.


Gomez and Stenker continue searching.

GOMEZ: We got a contract, you know? He says we don’t mess around with anything.

STENKER: That contract was made when energy was cheap, Gomez. You got a big conservation problem here.


The cryo-cabinet bursts open, spilling out icy vapor.


Gomez and Stenker continue searching.

GOMEZ: [worriedly:] You hear something?

STENKER: [dismissively:] Come on, Gomez.

GOMEZ: [to himself:] (Spanish)


A shadow falls over the rat, and it lets out a series of shrill squeaks.


Gomez and Stenker hear the rat’s 'scream' and pause.

STENKER: What the heck was that?

GOMEZ: [scared:] I don’t know.

They resume their search and round a corner.


Gomez and Stenker arrive and stare across the room at the cryo-cabinet, which is still spilling vapor.

GOMEZ: We shoulda called the estate.

They approach cautiously. They look down and see the rat, now frozen. Stenker picks up the rat.

STENKER: [in awe:] Frozen solid. A regular rat-sicle.

They stare again at the cryo-cabinet.

GOMEZ: What do you suppose it is?

STENKER: A refrigerator of some kind.

Gomez and Stenker hear footsteps and a groan coming from behind them. They turn slowly around. The frost-covered occupant of the cryo-cabinet stands over them, hands raised, and yells his first word in 48 years.

BEEF: [demanding:] Ameliaaaaa!

STENKER, GOMEZ: [together, yelling in fear:] Aaah!

========== 3:16 to 8:38 ==========


(“She Blinded Me With Science” plays and the opening credits are shown.)

An ambulance drives down a road, with 2 police motorcycle escorts. The convoy soon reaches Humanidyne and continues through the main gate.


The convoy goes all the way to the back, next door to the “Janitorial And Maintenance Division”. The 2 police motorcycles drive off, their job done. The ambulance stops at another gate, which is blocked by a forklift hauling garbage. A roll-up door, beside a sign reading “Human Investigation Team”, opens and Billy ducks under it to come outside; El and 2 lab techs with some medical equipment follow close behind.

BILLY: Alright, come on, let’s go. Let’s get it out here.

EL: [to techs:] Be careful with all that stuff now.

BILLY: [stops as he notices forklift] Ah now— Garbage, El. There’s garbage in our driveway!

EL: Alright, just relax.

El hurries forward; the 2 techs follow, and all 3 push on the forklift.

BILLY: We get all the luck and now there’s garbage.

EL: [to forklift driver:] Get it out of the way.

BILLY: [starts forward again] Get it out. Just get it out of here.

EL: [to techs:] Push, push. [to forklift driver:] Come on, Joe, come on. Come on.

BILLY: [angrily:] Come on! Come on.

EL: [to forklift driver:] Come on. Come on, Joe, move this thing.

Billy reaches the forklift and hits it with the insulated gloves he’s holding.

BILLY: [angrily:] Get the garbage out of here.

The forklift finally moves, and the ambulance drives through the gate.

BILLY: [to Ambulance Attendant:] Alright, come on! [to forklift driver:] Alright, get that thing outta here.

The forklift drives off as Billy, El, and 2 techs prepare to receive the ambulance’s cargo. Ambulance Attendant gets out, shaking off frost and shivering from the cold that's being put off by Beef.

BILLY: [to Ambulance Attendant, jokingly:] Howdy. Got the AC up a little high, don’t ya?


Beef is pulled out of the ambulance on a gurney - he's unconscious and still covered in frost.

BILLY: [directing:] Easy. Easy does it. Come on. There we go. [to Ambulance Attendant:] You guys monitor his vitals?

AMBULANCE ATTENDANT: [still shivering:] Couldn’t get near ‘em, he froze every instrument we had.

EL: [giving the scientific explanation:] Contact temperature transference.

BILLY: Haven’t seen that in awhile. [directing:] Okay, come on, let’s get him inside. Come on, come on.

Everyone pushes the gurney towards the roll-up door.

BILLY: [to El:] Okay, the scanner’s workin’ right?

EL: No problem, Billy. Momquist put somebody on it.

BILLY: Okay, this is great. We have a walking popsicle here. Watch the— Ah, it came out. [to himself, annoyed:] Nothing ever works around here.

Everyone goes through the roll-up door, past a sign that reads: “Weird ‘R’ Us”.



Everyone hurries down the hallway; Donna joins the entourage to report on the newest patient.

DONNA: His name’s Arnold Biefneiter.

BILLY: Niefbeiter?

DONNA: Biefneiter. Born in Kansas City in nineteen hundred. No living relatives.

BILLY: The guy barely looks forty.

EL: Cryogenics, Billy. That machine froze the poor boy like a pork chop.

The entourage pushes open the doors and comes through into the hallway.

BILLY: Donna, speaking of which, you’re gonna let me know about dinner tonight, right?

DONNA: [goes on with her report instead of answering] The machine was built for Howard Hubert in nineteen thirty-five. The billionaire intended to use it for himself, but they were unable to get the apparatus to work.

EL: Until Biefneiter here tried it out at Bemins.


Miss Nance and Tech With Ponytail open the doors to H.I.T. lab for the entourage. Everyone but Billy enters – he just hangs back long enough to ask a question.

BILLY: [to Donna:] Am I supposed to read that as a no?

EL: [directing:] Okay, let’s get him up on the table. And nobody touch him with their hands, alright?

MISS NANCE: [to Billy:] I’m going to lunch in a couple of minutes, Dr. Hayes. You have some messages.

Everyone helps move Beef to the table El referred to.

BILLY: [directing:] Alright, let me have that insulation blanket. That tray. Alright, give me a clamp.

LADY TECH: Body temperature is up to twenty seven degrees, and still rising.

BILLY: Alright. [to Ambulance Attendant:] How long has he been out of the deep freeze?

AMBULANCE ATTENDANT: About two hours. And he was weak when we found him.

TECH WITH PONYTAIL: Cardiovascular’s failing.

MISS NANCE: [to Billy:] A Mrs. Schimel Krantz from Kenosha, Wisconsin called. Her son Randy’s been breathing fire and she’s scared about losing the house.

Billy adjusts the scanner over Beef.

BILLY: [directing:] Alright, someone hit the power switch on this scanner.

Billy starts working with the scanner controls.

BILLY: [to Donna:] Look, you know, I really don’t think it’s fair to judge me by just one date, ya know?

Donna sighs and rolls her eyes.

LADY TECH: Body temperature’s rising up to twenty eight degrees.

BILLY: [to Donna:] Okay, so, Hamburger Haven isn’t, uh, Chez Francois’, and is it my fault Francois lost the reservations? I don’t think so, no.

Billy adjusts the scanner over Beef again.

BILLY: [directing:] Will someone hit the juice on this, please?

Ambulance Attendant takes a picture of Beef as El checks on Beef’s condition.

MISS NANCE: [to Billy:] Mr. Miller, The Invisible Man, called again. He said he’s been in to see you six times, but you treat ‘im like he’s not even here.

Billy places his stethoscope on Beef’s chest.

EL: [sighs] We’re losing ‘im.

TECH WITH PONYTAIL: I’m getting ventricular fibrillation.

BILLY: He’s right. I said, ‘Hit the juice’.

Someone “hits the juice” and the scanner over Beef comes on – only to emit a bang and some sparks and then die. Billy, Donna, Lady Tech, and Tech With Ponytail start in surprise.

BILLY: [to Donna:] Weren’t we supposed to get this fixed last week?

DONNA: [sighs:] Budget cuts.

LADY TECH: Body temperature’s up to twenty-nine degrees.

MISS NANCE: [to Billy:] Oh, and your mother called from her beauty salon.

TECH WITH PONYTAIL: He’s arresting.

EL: [with sudden realization:] No he’s not. He’s melting.

BILLY: [realizing too:] Walking popsicle! [to Donna:] Open the freezer.

Donna nods and gestures for Ambulance Attendant to help her. They hurry over to the walk-in freezer that's at the back of the lab and open the door.

AMBULANCE ATTENDANT: [seeing odd assortment of items in the freezer:] Whoa!

EL: Donna, empty it out. Take out the shelf.

DONNA: [to Ambulance Attendant:] Come on!

AMBULANCE ATTENDANT: Yeah. Anything you say.

Donna and Ambulance Attendant remove a rolling shelf (it has a Snickers box on it that will come in handy later!), then everyone else rolls the table with Beef on it up to the freezer.

BILLY: [directing:] Alright, c’mon, let’s get the blanket off. We’re gonna tip him into the freezer. Let’s move the gurney up. Right there. Okay, lock up your wheel. Right, on my count, on three we’ll do it. Ready? One… two… three!

Everyone grunts as they raise the table to a standing position. Billy and Lady Tech push Beef forward to rest against a shelf.

BILLY: Okay. Alright. [to Lady Tech:] Lock the door. Watch the wires. Watch the cord.

Billy and Lady Tech close the freezer door. (sign: “Please do not leave lunches in freezer overnight.”) Tech With Ponytail checks the diagnostics.

TECH WITH PONYTAIL: Twenty eight degrees. Twenty seven.

Everyone waits expectantly.

TECH WITH PONYTAIL: [looking up:] CV stabilizing.

Everyone shows their relief.

BILLY: Alright, Miss Nance. Where was my mother calling from?

Billy doesn’t get an answer – Miss Nance is no longer in the lab. Everyone else exchanges glances.

BILLY: [to El, confused:] Where’d she go?

DONNA, AMBULANCE ATTENDANT, TECH WITH PONYTAIL: [together, as if it’s obvious:] Lunch!

Billy sighs.

========== 8:38 to 9:17 ==========



Strickland and General Thiel are intently watching footage of the destructive capabilities of the newly-built Neutron Beam Cannon. The footage shows the Cannon (carried out over the ocean in a helicopter) being fired at an island - the island is completely vaporized! Strickland and General Thiel both look far too pleased for the world’s own good.

GENERAL THIEL: Yes. Yes, it sends chills up my spine. Please, one more time.

Strickland rewinds the footage.

========== 9:17 to 11:37 ==========



Billy has his feet up on his desk, talking into the desk phone.

BILLY: [into phone:] No, Mom. Mom. I happen to like my car. I really do. No, I do! ... I gue— Yes, dented fenders or no dented fenders. I— ... Well— Well, I happen to think that a sixty-five Dart has—it has… It has—it has charm. ... Yeah. ... No, no, I can’t— No, I can’t afford another car, but that doesn’t mean— No, Mom. Mom! ... Mom, will you stop and listen to— Will you stop—will you stop and listen to me? Will you listen? ... I don’t care what Jimmy Havenstock drives, Mom, I really don—. Doctor Havenstock, okay. I’m a doctor, too, Mom. I am.

El, who’s trying to fix the darned scanner that died earlier, glances over at Billy in sympathy.

BILLY: [into phone:] Look, I gotta go now, Mom. Okay? I do. I love you, I— But I’ve gotta get going. El’s—we’re doing some things here, okay? [rushing:] I love you. Say hello to Dad. I’ll talk to you later. 'Kay, bye.

Billy hangs up quickly, then sighs as he sits up. El looks over quizzically.

BILLY: She was talking to the people in the beauty salon, and wanted to know why her son wasn’t a yuppie.

El gives a sympathetic grimace. Billy tosses something onto his desk with an “Oh well” air, then gets up.

BILLY: I tell ya, El, we got some problems here.

EL: You’re a man with a gift for understatement.

Billy picks up the still-frosty Snickers box from his desk and goes to the freezer as he spells out the problems they have. (water bottle sticker: “Join the defensive. Get a tank.” Sign: “One nuclear bomb can ruin your whole day.”)

BILLY: I mean, this is important stuff here. I mean, Beef could—Beef here could be a new breakthrough.

Billy opens the freezer (Beef is still inside, propped against the shelves and doing fine), puts the Snickers box up, then closes it back.

BILLY: And how are we treated?

EL: [he knows:] No funding, broken equipment, and a salary that could make a paperboy cry.

BILLY: Exactly.

EL: Look, the problem here is results. Plain and simple. Strickland wants results. Got that?

BILLY: Okay. Results. He wants results. Okay, alright, look, I’ll show you results.

Billy starts around the lab to point out some of the results H.I.T. has gotten. He takes a piece of stretchy material from a petrie dish and holds it up.

BILLY: How about this? How about my elastic skin, okay?

EL doesn’t think Strickland will be impressed, but answers anyway.

EL: Right.

BILLY: Or how about your glandular research over here, huh? I mean look at this.

Billy moves on to a row of cages with animals in them at the back of the lab.

BILLY: [indicating two bunnies of very different sizes:] Big bunny. Little bunny. I mean, look. I mean, come on.

Billy holds the tiny bunny’s cage next to the giant bunny’s cage for comparison.

BILLY: This isn’t progress?

EL: Billy, it isn’t human.

Billy gives up, realizing El is right. El continues to clarify as Billy carries the tiny bunny's cage back to his desk and sits down.

EL: Look, when Momquist was running this place, things were different, okay? He’s a man of science. He understands bunnies. But this guy Strickland, he’s all business, okay? He wants stuff that’s commercial. Stuff that turns a profit. Stuff that has to do with—

BILLY: War. Right. [picks up a piece of paper:] No, El, that’s it. I mean, what does he think we do around here anyway, huh? [balls up the piece of paper] Strickland wants war. [throws the balled-up paper through a basketball hoop on the wall] He’s gonna get it.

========== 11:37 to 12:44 ==========



Strickland and General Thiel are in a meeting with the Joint Chiefs of Staff (some of them have plates of food). Senator Donner carries his plate to his seat as he talks.

SENATOR DONNER: Please understand, Dr. Strickland, General Thiel, you are asking Congress to approve of construction of the most destructive weapon in the world.

A screen behind Strickland and General Thiel is showing specs of the Neutron Cannon.

GENERAL THIEL: You betcha. If you could see what this baby can do.

STRICKLAND: [moving on quickly:] Um, the Neutron Beam will have enormous destructive potential. But it will also be the cleanest weapon in our arsenal, Senator. No radiation. No fallout.

SENATOR DONNER: [seriously:] Which makes it doubly dangerous. It’s a weapon that could be tempting to use. Washington is expecting an enormous amount of protest worldwide, and we need to guarantee that if this, um, Neutron Beam is constructed, that you in the military are going to have a responsible – and safe – place to keep it.

STRICKLAND: We already do, Senator. The NB bunker is located at a secret site about three hours from here.

Screen now shows specs of the NB bunker: “Elevation: 237 ft, Tunnel depth: 150 ft, Water tunnel: active, Status: secure, Laser: primed, Seismic motion: n/a.”

STRICKLAND: Now the only way into the chamber in which the Beam will be stored is through a defense corridor [indicates on screen] which is virtually impassable.

GENERAL THIEL: And the Pentagon is ready to throw everything it’s got against that defense system to prove it.

========== 12:44 to 12:52 ==========



Billy walks up to Secretary’s desk beside a sign that reads: “Dr. James Strickland”.

========== 12:52 to 15:18 ==========



Dr. Momquist steps forward to add his concerns.

DR. MOMQUIST: Excuse me. I think that before we go any further, we should inform the senators of the dangers we’ve encountered in the computer simulations.

STRICKLAND: [smoothly:] Dr. Momquist. Gentlemen, my distinguished predecessor is a scientist of great precaution. Now, the computers indicate that there are some bugs in the Beam that still need to be worked out.

GENERAL THIEL: But that’s the way it always is with these kind of breakthroughs. [laughs] Hell, everything starts out with bugs in the military. You boys know that.

Everyone laughs knowledgably as the door opens and Billy enters the room.

BILLY: [to himself:] Whoa! Big guns. [calls:] Hey, Dr S., Dr. Momquist.

DR. MOMQUIST: [waving:] Billy.

STRICKLAND: Uh, Dr. Hayes, I’m a little busy just now.

Billy pretends he hadn’t thought Strickland might be busy and sets his plan in motion.

BILLY: Right. Um. You’re a little busy right now. [dropping his first hint:] I’ll just come back later and we can talk about it alone.

STRICKLAND: [dismissively:] Fine, Dr. Hayes.

Strickland didn’t take the bait - Billy continues with his hint dropping, undeterred.

BILLY: I mean, we don’t wanna let these guys in on it yet, right?

General Thiel looks interested – Billy may have hooked someone.

GENERAL THIEL: Let us in on what, Doctor?

Strickland looks at Billy, who now turns to his prospective new catch.

BILLY: Nothing, nothing, um… You see, General, over at the Human Investigation Team, our lips are sealed. I mean, when the boss says a project is secret, that’s—

GENERAL THIEL: [interrupts:] Secret project?

Strickland looks annoyed; Billy ignores him and presses on – he’s almost certainly hooked General Thiel.

BILLY: Really nothing, it’s just one of the, uh, one of the little things that we’re working on with a lot of commercial potential. The kind of stuff that can turn a big, big profit. We’re talking war here, General.

STRICKLAND: [warningly:] Hayes, if you don’t get out that door…

GENERAL THIEL: Let him talk, Strickland.

Strickland looks at General Thiel in surprise. General Thiel waits for Billy’s explanation – he’s definitely hooked (it was probably the mention of “war” that did it).

BILLY: [to himself:] Forgive me, Dr. Momquist, but it’s time to do a little groveling.

Billy launches into his pitch as he starts walking around the conference table.

BILLY: General, imagine if you will, an army of soldiers that can actually see in the dark. Huh?

General Thiel listens, interested.

BILLY: We’re working on it. Imagine fighting men who can grow to be… ten feet tall. Huh?

General Thiel stands up, even more interested.

BILLY: We’re working on that, too.

Senator Donner looks surprised and Strickland leans back in his chair, listening.

BILLY: Gentlemen, try to picture, if you can, Navy frogmen that can actually breathe underwater. I mean, infantry that can run thirty miles an hour. I mean, think about jet pilots whose reflexes are as fast as that of a computer’s.

Billy looks from General Thiel, who takes his cigar out of his mouth, definitely interested now, to Senator Donner, who frowns.

BILLY: So where’s this technology coming from, huh? I mean, who’s working on these things, right? Well, we are. At H-I-T.

Billy has arrived at the opposite end of the conference table, next to Strickland, who rolls his eyes at Billy’s words.

BILLY: And at H.I.T...

Billy pauses for effect and glances at Dr. Momquist, who smiles a little.

BILLY: ...we do more of it than anyone else in the world.

General Thiel puts his cigar back in his mouth, looking sold.

BILLY: [quietly, praising himself:] Pretty good.

Secretary rushes in.


Billy looks over at her.

SECRETARY: H.I.T.... hit the fan.

========== 15:18 to 18:15 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – Humanidyne grounds:

6 techs and workers are fleeing in panic and yelling as they rush through the roll-up door leading to H.I.T.



4 more techs run down the hallway to escape toward the outer door. El is in the middle of the lab, trying to calm Beef.

EL: [to Beef, while backing up:] Oh, easy. Eaaasy does it.

BEEF: [angrily:] Aaah!

EL: Okay, no-one’s gonna hurt you, pal. Okay, nice and easy. Whoa, whoa. Whoa, now c-c’mon, Beef, be cool.

BEEF: [angrily:] Aaarrgh!

Beef rips the (hopefully not fixed yet) scanner from its base in the ceiling - sparks fly and El jumps back.

EL: Holy scanner.

Beef prepares to swing the scanner.

EL: Wh—whoa. Whoa, whoa!

BEEF: [angrily:] Aaarrgh!

Beef throws the scanner against its controls - more sparks fly.

EL: Holy—

El looks around in panic, but there's nobody there to help him.

EL: Where’d everybody go?

BEEF: [demanding:] Ameliaaaa!


Billy comes through the door and into the hallway, followed by Dr. Momquist, Strickland, General Thiel, and the "big guns" from the conference room. Miss Nance joins the crowd as they head toward the lab.

MISS NANCE: [to Billy:] There were some calls while you were out.

STRICKLAND: What’s going on down here? It’s freezing!


Billy and the others see the damage through the lab windows and stop.

BEEF: [angrily:] Argh!

BILLY: Aw, no!

Beef rips a beaker stand from its table and throws it against the wall, then tips over the table.

BILLY: Cripes!

Billy hurries into the lab; the others follow and stop in the doorway.

BILLY: El, man, how’d he get out?

EL: Uh, he broke the door wide open. The cold seems to recharge his strength.

BEEF: [demanding:] Ameliaaaa!

EL: He keeps calling for ‘Amelia’.

Beef sweeps some stuff off a shelf area. General Thiel watches Beef’s destructiveness with interest.

MISS NANCE: [unfazed:] First call was from a man who says he sprouts fish scales every time he goes swimming.

STRICKLAND: [to Billy:] Who is he?

MISS NANCE: [assuming question was meant for her:] He didn’t leave his name.

BILLY: [to Strickland:] He’s a cryogenic guy we got this morning.

EL: He freezes everything he touches.

Beef studies a beaker he picked up, watching the orange liquid inside freeze solid.

BILLY: [to himself:] Wait a minute, wait a minute. [to El:] What year was he frozen?

EL: Thirty-seven. July.

BEEF: [demanding:] Ameliaaaa!

BILLY: [realizing:] Earhart.

Beef throws the frozen beaker against the wall in frustration - it smashes and El flinches.

EL: [to Billy:] What?

BILLY: That was the year Amelia Earhart disappeared. Maybe that’s the only thing he remembers.

Beef lumbers toward more beakers and El backs out of his way; General Thiel watches.

MISS NANCE: [to Billy:] Your landlord called at two fifteen to say your check bounced.

Beef’s attention is attracted by the row of cages at the back of the lab, where the tiny bunny is moving around in its cage. El follows Beef’s gaze; Beef heads toward the cages.

EL: [worriedly:] My bunnies. Ohh.

El scrambles over a desk chair and across some debris to get to the cages first – he has to save his bunnies!

BILLY: [trying to distract Beef:] Hey, Beef.

El grabs a stool and stands protectively in front of the cages, holding the stool up like a lion tamer.

EL: [to Beef:] Okay, back off, Biefneiter.

Beef continues forward.

EL: Okay? These bunnies are mine.

BILLY: El, get out of there, man! He’ll freeze ya.

Coming to El’s rescue, Billy dodges behind Beef, jumps onto a desk – grabbing his insulated gloves on the way – then hops off to stand in front of El.

BEEF: [angrily:] Aaarrgh!

BILLY: [putting on the gloves:] Biefneiter. Beef, listen to me.

BEEF: [angrily:] Ameliaaaa!

Beef picks up a nearby chair and throws it.

BILLY: Beef, don’t—

The chair crashes against the far wall. Beef starts advancing again.

BILLY: Whoa. [to Beef, trying to placate him:] Look, see the door? Look at the door.

Beef turns and looks toward the door.

BILLY: See the generals? Okay, they’re trying to find Amelia. I mean— And they’re trying really hard. And if anyone’s gonna find ‘em, it’s them.

Strickland and Dr. Momquist look on, a little apprehensive. One of the crowd waves. Beef turns back to Billy and El.

BILLY: They’ll find her, Beef. Okay? Trust me on this.

Beef looks at Billy suspiciously.

BILLY: Okay. [swallows and backs up toward El] What do you think, El? Maybe—maybe just one little bunny, huh?

EL: [scandalized:] No!

Beef walks forward angrily. Billy looks around for something, anything, to give Beef instead of a bunny. He spots a frozen Snickers, grabs it, unwraps it partway, and holds it out to Beef.

BILLY: How ‘bout a frozen candy bar, huh? Huh, Beef?

Beef stops and contemplates the offer. Everyone watches intently – even Miss Nance looks up from her memo pad. Beef takes the Snickers from Billy and takes a bite of it.

BEEF: [enjoying it:] Ummm.

Billy and El watch and wait. Unexpectedly, the Snickers knocks Beef out and he falls backwards to the floor with a thud. Billy and El react. General Thiel puts his cigar back in his mouth, impressed.

BILLY: [to El, as if he’d known it would work:] Piece o’ cake.

========== 18:15 to 20:04 ==========



Beef is unconscious on a gurney and clean-up is going on. Billy, El, Strickland, General Thiel, Dr. Momquist, and 3 techs are grouped around the gurney.

GENERAL THIEL: Now that was one whale of a display of destruction. You say he was cryogenically frozen?

BILLY: We like to think of him as a giant popsicle. You know, two or three hours at normal temperature and he melts. You wanna recharge him, you just throw him back in the fridge.

GENERAL THIEL: And he can freeze anything he touches?

EL: We call it "contact temperature transference". CTT.

General Thiel laughs and enthuses to Strickland.

GENERAL THIEL: The military applications are tremendous. Imagine, freezing an enemy harbor. What the hey, the whole Black Sea! Huh!

BILLY: [concerned:] Wait a minute here. General, Dr. S., you don’t seem to understand something here, okay?

Billy tries to impress on them the consequences this would have for Beef; Strickland and General Thiel listen (tough military man that he is, General Thiel eats his cigar while doing so).

BILLY: [concerned:] I mean, this whole temperature transference thing. It really takes a lot out of the big guy, you know?

Strickland nods.

BILLY: [concerned:] I mean, you have him freeze a whole harbor – or even a small lake or something – and you could drive his temperature up enough to send him to the big icebox in the sky, ya know?

Strickland and General Thiel just stare at Billy for a second, unmoved.

STRICKLAND: Yeah, you let us worry about that, Hayes.

Strickland turns to one of the techs and indicates Beef.

STRICKLAND: Take him to the level one lab in the military bunker.

The tech nods and he and the other 2 techs push Beef’s gurney toward the door; Strickland, General Thiel, and Dr. Momquist follow.

BILLY: Hey, wai— [glances at El] Hey, wait a minute, Dr. S.


Billy trails after Strickland; El follows.

BILLY: You’re not serious are you? I mean, he’s our baby, you can’t give him to the Military Division. [appeals to Dr. Momquist:] D—Dr. Mom.

DR. MOMQUIST: He and El are more experienced.

STRICKLAND: I’m not interested in their experience, Momquist. [to Billy:] Something in this program finally stands a chance to make a profit. You should feel good about it.

Billy and El slow to a stop as Strickland and the others continue down the hallway.

BILLY: And we do! We do. It’s just, me and my gang—

STRICKLAND: [turning back briefly:] Don’t have the facility.

Billy and El start forward again.

BILLY: Exactly, boss. Just think what we could do with a new building, more equipment, paid vacations, maybe a little more funding.

Strickland stops and faces Billy and El; Everyone else leaves except Dr. Momquist, who joins Strickland.

STRICKLAND: [scoffs:] Funding? You don’t think we’re gonna put more money into this program do you?

BILLY: I know. I—it probably sounds a little crazy. I know.

STRICKLAND: Yes it does. And now that I’ve seen this operation down here, I think we should quit while we’re ahead.

El reacts with a disappointed "Here it comes" expression, but Billy is unsure what Strickland is getting at.

BILLY: What are you trying to say here, boss?

STRICKLAND: Termination, Hayes.

Billy's face falls and El sighs as Strickland spells it out.

STRICKLAND: You, ‘Wilt the Stilt’, this entire flaky program are out the door.

Strickland leaves and Dr. Momquist looks at Billy and El sympathetically. Billy looks up at El as it sinks in.

========== 20:04 to 21:51 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – basketball court:

Billy is dribbling a basketball.

BILLY: [to El, glumly:] We’re dead meat, ya know.

El listens, looking glum as well.

BILLY: I mean, once Humanidyne gives you the boot, it’s adios time. I mean, we’re gone. There’s not another researcher in the country that’s gonna take us.

El shrugs.

BILLY: Some leader I turned out to be, huh?

Billy tosses the basketball and it goes through the hoop; El reaches to catch the ball as it comes out, but misses and catches it on the rebound. Ballplayer comes over.

BALLPLAYER: [to El:] Hey, Stretch, gotta game of full quarter over here. Could use a good center.

EL: [trying to cover for his lack of basketball skills:] Hey, uh, thanks, but no. I’m giving a few pointers to my little brother here.

El laughs and quickly bounces the ball toward Billy, who tries to catch it on the first bounce, but can’t since it was a wild throw.

EL: [to Billy, pretending to be the one better at basketball:] Hey, no, no, man. You gotta anticipate. Come on, Billy, loosen up. Anticipate. Come on, Billy.

Billy says nothing – choosing to play along rather than embarrass El. Ballplayer gives El a funny look.

EL: [with put-on casualness:] Check ya next time.


Ballplayer rolls his eyes and walks off; Billy waves after him.

EL: Billy. Can we get outta here?

BILLY: Not till you take some shots, El.

Billy bounces the ball toward El, who knocks it back.

EL: [firmly:] No, man. I’m not takin’ no shots.

BILLY: Listen, my friend. Let me explain a little something to you, okay? [indicates his Misfits of Science jersey] I’ve got ten uniforms just like the one I’m wearing, sitting on a shelf, at home.

El’s probably heard something like this before, but he only rolls his eyes and crosses his arms as Billy continues.

BILLY: Now—now that’s ten uniforms at fifteen ninety-five a pop, sitting on a shelf, waiting for a seven-foot-f-four [overcome by the irony for a second] star center to learn to play ball. Shoot, Stretch.

Billy holds the ball out but El doesn’t take it.

EL: Come on, Billy. You promised you wouldn’t make me.

BILLY: It’s for your own good, bud.

Billy leads El by the arm out to a position to take a shot.

BILLY: Listen, your life as a scientist is over, okay? I mean, it’s gone, kiss it goodbye.

El finally takes the ball as Billy turns him to face the basket.

BILLY: [looking El in the eye:] Listen, face it, the only shot you got left now, is the NBA. [puts El’s arms in the correct position] Okay, man? Alright, El? Loosen up, loosen up, okay?

El loosens up as Billy steps back.

BILLY: Take your shot. You can do it. Just—

El glances toward Ballplayer’s game – luckily nobody there is watching.

BILLY: You got it. Just take your shot. Loose, loose. Take your shot.

El dribbles twice, resigned to his fate.

BILLY: There ya go. There ya go.

El throws the ball.

BILLY: There we go.

The ball sails way over the top of the hoop and lands about four feet from it. Billy turns away with an “Okay, maybe there we don’t go” expression.

========== 21:51 to 22:25 ==========

Exterior (daytime) - boulevard:

("Teamwork - prelude" plays.)

Billy and El are walking down a crowded boulevard.

BILLY: Okay, NBA’s out. Look, maybe he’d take us back if I got down on my hands and knees and, like, licked his 'Wegians, or something. I mean, Strickland’s into humiliation, isn’t he? I—

Billy is distracted by a blonde in a swimsuit who’s rollerskating toward him and El.

BILLY: [to blonde:] Excuse me, would you happen to be seeking representation?

Billy stays turned to face the blonde as she skates between him and El, and he ends up walking backwards.

BILLY: [trailing off as he realizes she’s ignoring him:] Of any type...

EL: Billy. Billy.

BILLY: [only half listening] Huh? What?

EL: I think I got something that’ll get us back in.

BILLY: Look, it’s not worth doing anything kinky, okay? I’m telling ya.

El stops walking and so does Billy.

EL: I’m serious.

BILLY: [laughs] So am I.

EL: Look, you know that glandular serum I gave the little bunnies?

BILLY: Yeah, that shrinking stuff, right?

EL: Yeah. Well I gave a large dose of that to something else.

========== 22:25 to 25:15 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – beach house:

back patio:

Billy is standing facing El, who’s sitting at a table with an umbrella covering.

BILLY: [incredulous:] Huh—wha— Are you kidding? You gave yourself a dose of that poison?

EL: Billy, you gotta understand—

BILLY: Understand, hell. You just started preliminary testing on the bunnies!

EL: How would you feel? Growing up in Watts, seven-foot-four and not being able to play basketball? Do you have any idea of the humiliation—

BILLY: Humili— El, you’re a scientist, man!

EL: [annoyed:] I’m a scientist because I hate being tall!

El stands up and his head disappears inside the umbrella. He ducks out of it and whacks it in irritation.

EL: [sighs:] Why do you think I spend all my free time on growth research?

El walks over to the edge of the patio while listing his troubles.

EL: I wanna be able to buy my clothes in normal people shops. Drive a car without kinking my neck.

Billy waits, letting El get it off his chest.

EL: Sleep in a bed with my feet in it. [sighs] I wanna be able to go out on a basketball court without feeling so much pressure.

Billy reacts (he’s partly guilty for some of said pressure).

EL: I wanted to get little, Billy. I took the serum... to get little.

El turns away with a 'Judge my actions as you will' expression and looks out over the Santa Monica beach. Billy studies El for a second - he can see now how hard it is for El, so he leaves his objections behind and joins El at the edge of the patio.

BILLY: El? ... How little?

El looks sideways at Billy, then checks to see that nobody is watching. Billy waits, watching and wondering. El reaches up and presses the back of his neck. He shrinks out of sight in one quick motion. Billy stares in amazement as El's clothes fall to the ground where El was just standing.

BILLY: That’s little. [glances around, then looks back down at the pile of clothes] Hey, El, where are ya? You in there?

El, now only the height of a Barbie doll, stands up inside the pile of his way-too-large-for-him-now clothes and waves at Billy.

EL: Hi.

Billy stares; El wraps the edge of his shirt closer around himself.

EL: Billy. There’re some clothes in my pocket. Do you think you could...

BILLY: [amused:] What’re you kidding? You got clothes?

EL: You don’t expect me to run around naked, do you?

Billy kneels down and reaches for the clothes.

EL: Thanks.

Billy takes a tiny beige jacket and tiny beige pants out of said pocket and looks at them.

BILLY: [with a “What gives?” look:] Ken’s jogging suit, El?

EL: [impatiently:] What do you want: Giorgio Armani? Come on, come on, give ‘em to me.

BILLY: [joking:] You always were into designer labels, it's weird.

Billy hands El the jogging suit and El starts getting dressed.

BILLY: [clears throat] So, El, will you answer a question for me?

EL: Sure, sure. What?

BILLY: Look, how long do you stay like that?

EL: It takes about fourteen minutes for the hormone to wear off.

BILLY: [trying to get it straight:] Wh-what do you… You press [indicates his own neck] the stuff into your system when you—when you hit the back of your head?

EL: Something like that. We call it a “neurological reflex”. I can only do it once an hour.

Billy kneels down and puts out both his hands as a step for El. El climbs onto Billy’s hands and Billy lifts him up to eye level.

BILLY: [thinking of the possibilities:] This is incredible, El. Think what this could mean to medical science.

EL: [solemnly:] Think what this could mean to an army.

Billy stares at him, thinking of it.

========== 25:15 to 27:01 ==========



GENERAL THIEL: Well, whaddaya say? Do you think the committee bought it?

Dr. Momquist slowly peeks into the conference room and sees Strickland and General Thiel, who are rewatching the Neutron Beam footage

STRICKLAND: [gives a short laugh] Does the army buy seven-hundred dollar screwdrivers? They swallowed it hook, line, and sinker.

Dr. Momquist steps into the room unnoticed, watching the footage as well. He comes closer, staring in shocked silence as the footage gets to the part where the island is vaporized. Strickland and General Thiel are just as pleased as before, but Dr. Momquist can't believe his eyes - this is terrible!

GENERAL THIEL: Now that sure beats skinnydipping on a hot summer day. What a thrill! If those suits in Washington could see this!

Dr. Momquist finally finds his voice and speaks his outrage.

DR. MOMQUIST: They’d throw you in jail so fast it’d make your head spin.

Strickland and General Thiel turn around quickly.

STRICKLAND: [demanding:] How did you get in here, Momquist?

DR. MOMQUIST: [angrily:] In building this weapon, you violated every AEC* statute. Every nuclear arms regulation—

(*Atomic Energy Commission)

STRICKLAND: [interrupts calmly:] On the face of the earth, Doctor. That’s the difference between you and me. Congress drags its heels.

Strickland walks over to a table and gets some coffee as he continues.

STRICKLAND: By the time they approve this thing, we’ll all be dead and buried. The General wants to buy the weapon. I want to sell it to him. That’s how business gets done.

DR. MOMQUIST: The Beam sets up a chain reaction we can’t control! The computer simulations—

STRICKLAND: [interrupts dismissively:] Were only computer simulations.

DR. MOMQUIST: [angrily:] I just saw an island disappear! Next time it could be the entire ocean! [imploring General Thiel:] It is dangerous!

GENERAL THIEL: [laughs] The atomic bomb is dangerous, Doctor. Is that any reason to get rid of it? Hmm?

Secretary comes in, followed by 2 guards.

SECRETARY: I’m sorry, Dr. Strickland. He just slipped by.

STRICKLAND: [to guards:] Take him to the lab in the Military Division.

The 2 guards grab Dr. Momquist and drag him away while he tries to appeal to Strickland.

DR. MOMQUIST: [desperately:] No, no. Wait a minute. Wait a minute! This is dangerous. It’s dangerous! It could finish the world!

The 2 guards get Dr. Momquist out of the room. Strickland rejoins General Thiel.

STRICKLAND: [unfeelingly:] I think we just found someone to test with the ice man.

General Thiel nods.

========== 27:01 to 27:11 ==========


Military Division lab and hallway:

A tech and 2 MP’s escort Dr. Momquist down the hallway and into the lab, per Strickland’s instructions. Beef is there, already being tested on in a portable sauna.

BEEF: [wailing:] Ameliaaa!

========== 27:11 to 29:06 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – beach house:

back patio:

Billy is cooking burgers at the barbecue; El is sitting down in front of the TV.

BILLY: You know what they’d do to you, don’t you?

EL: The same thing they’re doing to Biefneiter.

BILLY: Exactly. We’re talking inhumane here. Why do you think we never showed ‘em Mr. Electricity?

EL: Johnny Bukowski?

BILLY: Yeah. And that—that—that, uh, telekinetic girl. The one with the, um, nice—

EL: Probation officer. You couldn’t keep your hands off of her.

BILLY: [impatiently:] Alright, look, so the kid was a delinquent, and she had a probation officer that was cute. My point is, that it’s always been our policy to protect weird people from the warmongers, right?

El nods in agreement.

BILLY: So now that you’re weird, why should we change our policy?

EL: Because it’s the only way we can get our jobs back.

BILLY: Huh. Whoa, big fella.

Billy gets the hose for the barbecue and brings it back as he continues.

BILLY: You don’t think there’s anyone else interested in tiny people? I mean, uh, think of the business applications you got here. Okay? I mean, you got your, uh... You got your hotels, your hospitals. You got your airlines. You got, uh, you got… Disneyland.

Billy hoses down the barbecue.

EL: [as if Billy should know better:] And you don’t think the government’s gonna buy them out? Look, if I work for anybody, me and my work is gonna end up top secret and in the army.

Billy walks over to El with the plate of dark burgers and holds it out to him.

BILLY: Dinner.

EL: You know what’s really depressing?

BILLY: Hey, these Billyburgers are not too rare.

EL: [answering his own question:] What’s really depressing, is that, [sighs] from now on, weird people got no place to go.

El picks his drink off the top of the TV.

EL: We were it, Billy. We were it.

News story starts up on the TV – Billy and El watch.

CINDY: [from TV:] The Joint Chiefs of Staff...

BILLY: [off what’s showing on TV:] Hey.

TV shows Cindy reporting out front of Humanidyne (her microphone reads “KHB 3”).

CINDY: [from TV:] ...met today with Humanidyne officials to discuss the construction of what’s believed to be a breakthrough in nuclear arms.

TV shows Strickland, General Thiel, and Senator Donner at a press conference table.

STRICKLAND: [from TV:] The Neutron Beam is portable, clean, and has no residual radiation.

SENATOR: [from TV:] But, I wanna emphasize that Congress will not authorize the construction – or the testing – of this weapon, until the safety and the security of the weapon’s storage site have been approved.

BILLY: Neutron Beam? Are they serious?

EL: Dr. Momquist said it was so dangerous, they’d never build it. Lost the big enchilada twice in computer simulations.

CINDY: [from TV:] ...nuclear arms. Senator Donner plans to keep a tight rein on this project.

BILLY: Big enchilada? Wh-what, Los Angeles?

EL looks at Billy and answers gravely.

EL: The world.

BILLY: Whoa.

CINDY: [from TV:] ...personally walk it through every step of the way.

BILLY: Wonder where Dr. Mom was during this?

========== 29:06 to 29:56 ==========


Military Division lab:

Dr. Momquist is on a table, drugged and mostly unconscious, with a tech standing over him; Beef is strapped to an upright table. The tech takes the blood sample he’s just gotten from Dr. Momquist and leaves the lab. Dr. Momquist wakes further and spots a phone across the room (“Who you gonna call? Ghostbusters!”). He shakily gets off the table and falls to his knees. He gets up and struggles across the room, knocking into things, and finally arrives at the phone. He dials.

========== 29:56 to 30:46 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – beach house:

back patio:

2 women are riding by on bikes. Billy, using the hose to clean the dishes, “accidentally” squirts water on the women, causing them to squeal.

BILLY: I’m sorry. Ca—can I dry those for you? I— No? [calling after them:] Nice bikes.

Behind Billy, El is cleaning the umbrella table. The phone rings and Billy picks it up.

BILLY: [into phone:] K-I-N-K hotline, topic is ‘favorite fetishes’. You’re on the air.


Military Division lab:

Dr. Momquist is on the floor, holding the phone – because he's drugged he’s unable to make full sentences.

DR. MOMQUIST: [into phone, breathing heavily:] B-Billy.

Back patio:

BILLY: [into phone, with concern:] Dr. Mom? You sound horrible. Where are ya?

El, who’s now sitting down, gets up at Billy’s words and heads to join him, looking concerned as well.

Military Division lab:

DR. MOMQUIST: [into phone, breathing heavily:] Neutron. Neu-neutron Beam.

Back patio:

BILLY: [into phone:] Yeah, Neutron Beam. We saw it. What’s going on, Doc?

Military Division lab:

DR. MOMQUIST: [into phone, breathing heavily:] S-S-Strickland.

Back patio:

BILLY: [into phone:] Strickland what? Where are you?

Military Division lab:

DR. MOMQUIST: [into phone, breathing heavily:] Military lab. With— With— Wi—with Bief— Biefnei—

Dr. Momquist starts to slip into unconsciousness again, sliding further onto the floor.

Back patio:

BILLY: [into phone:] Dr. Mom?

Military Division lab:

A tech and an MP who are outside the lab finally notice what’s going on. They run up as Dr. Momquist gasps out the last word he has strength for.

DR. MOMQUIST: [into phone:] H—hurry.

Back patio:

BILLY: [into phone:] Dr. Momquist?

Military Division lab:

Dr. Momquist falls fully unconscious, dropping the phone.

========== 30:46 to 35:38 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert:

Billy (driving) and El are in Billy’s convertible, driving down a desert road.

EL: [sighs] This is a scheme, Billy. You’re getting me into another one of your schemes.

BILLY: It’s not a scheme, El. This is a rescue operation. We gotta move fast, cause Dr. Mom did not sound good.

EL: You know, the thing to do here is just to pick up the phone and call the police.

BILLY: El, Strickland eats senators for breakfast. You don’t think he can handle the police?

EL: You don’t think he can handle us?

BILLY: Yes. You and me, yes. The population of Santa Monica, California, maybe. But we’re talking weird here, El. What we’re talking here is weird.

Billy parks at the bottom of a dirt road that leads up a ridge to Johnny B’s trailer.

EL: [suddenly suspicious:] Why are we parking down here?

Billy gets out, not answering.

EL: Billy. [gets out] You did call him?

BILLY: I told you I called him, okay?

Billy and El start walking up the dirt road.

EL: Well what’d he say?

BILLY: He said, uh, you know, that he would talk.

EL: He said we’d talk?

BILLY: Right. Sorta.

EL: ‘Sorta’? What’s ‘sorta’, Billy?

BILLY: Will you relax? He said he’d see us, okay?

EL: He said he’d see us?

BILLY: Yeah. In a manner of speaking.

EL: Are you listening to yourself?

El stops walking and Billy stops and turns to face him.

EL: Do you realize what you’re saying? Because he [gestures up toward the trailer, causing Billy to glance there, too] hated your guts when he left the lab.

BILLY: [defensively:] I can only take so much Chuck Berry, okay, El? I mean, he was pushing me to the limit.

Billy resumes walking, El follows.

EL: Yeah, but, did you have to terrorize him with the water gun?

BILLY: [dismissively:] That was a joke. That was a joke, El. Look, you’re blowing this way out of proportion, believe me.

EL: The water could have electrocuted him, so forgive me if I’m a little skeptical that he’s gonna welcome us with open arms.

BILLY: No. No, see, that’s—

Billy stops walking to explain; El waits.

BILLY: That’s not what I— [laughs] That’s not what he said.

EL: [sighs] What did he say, Billy?

BILLY: [takes a deep breath] Well, he—

Billy isn’t given the time to finish - a large blue bolt shoots straight toward him and El from the direction of the trailer. Billy and El notice in time and drop for cover as the bolt hits the ground right in front of them, leaving behind a small smoking crater. Billy and El stay on the ground. Billy looks over at El, who glares at him over the top of the smoking crater - El's question is moot now, but Billy goes ahead and comes clean.

BILLY: Well, he said that if he ever saw us again, that, uh... he’d blow our heads off.

Billy gets back to his feet; El slowly gets to his knees.

BILLY: [calling up the ridge:] Okay, hey. Heyyy, B-Man, that was a heck of a welcoming shot there-here. Your aim’s improving, fella.

Up on top of the ridge, Johnny B is nowhere in sight.

BILLY: [calling up the ridge:] Li—listen, uh, Johnny, you gotta be pretty tapped out after a blast like that. Um… Why’n’t ya come on out and we’ll talk.

Up on top of the ridge, Johnny B finally shows, walking out from behind the trailer. Encouraged that Johnny B seems to be willing to listen to him, Billy opens with a little flattery.

BILLY: Heyyy, B-Man. You’re lookin’ great.

Johnny B stops at the edge of the ridge, imposing and silent.

BILLY: [to El:] Does he look great or what? [prompting:] Huh?

EL: Great.

Johnny B puts his arms akimbo – Billy’s flattery isn’t working, so Billy tries to smooth things over.

BILLY: Listen, Johnny, ya know, I-I know the last time that we saw each other we left a couple things unsettled, and w—

Johnny B puts his hands together and fires another bolt. Billy has no time to move as the bolt hits in front of him, causing him to somersault backwards. El hugs the ground till the blast is over. Johnny B stays with his arms raised in a firing position. Billy gets quickly to his feet and El raises to his knees.

BILLY: Okay. Look. I apologize for the squirt gun. It wasn’t funny, okay? I admit that.

Johnny B doesn’t change position.

BILLY: But, B-Man. I mean, forty-six straight hours of—of C the B is—is a little intense, don’tcha— Johnny, can you just lower your arms, [demonstrates] so we can talk. I just want to talk to you a minute. Okay?

Johnny B lowers his arms.

BILLY: Look, I even brought you a peace offering.

Billy pulls a cassette out of his pocket and holds it up.

BILLY: It’s— Look, it’s—it’s Chuck’s greatest hits. Is that cool or what?

Johnny B does a speedrun down the ridge, stops next to Billy, and takes the cassette out of Billy's hand. Billy and El both react with amazement while Johnny B casually checks the back of the cassette.

JOHNNY B: I already have it.

Billy continues to stare at Johnny B as El joins them.

EL: [impressed:] Whoa! That’s incredible. You shot off two bolts and you could still move that fast?

JOHNNY B: Yeah, it’s gotten worse. I’m pretty tapped right now, but just from the static in the air, I’ll have a full charge in a couple of hours.

Johnny B illustrates by snapping to make his fingers spark. Billy and El exchange glances.

JOHNNY B: [brusquely:] So whaddaya want, Hayes? I’m busy.

BILLY: [as if Johnny B should think it’s the coolest thing:] I wanna make you a hero, Johnny. [prompting:] Huh?

Johnny B puts the cassette back into Billy’s hand.

JOHNNY B: Not interested.

Johnny B walks off; Billy glances at El in disbelief as they follow.

BILLY: [as if he can’t imagine:] Whaddaya mean ‘Not interested’? I mean, we’re talking network news here, a-a household name—

JOHNNY B: [cutting Billy off:] Don’t try to snow me. What, does Humanidyne need some new kind of secret weapon?

BILLY: No, we don’t even work for them anymore.

EL: He’s telling the truth, Johnny B. We just got fired.

JOHNNY B: [moodily:] Oh, so you need me for a freak show.

Billy reacts - it’s so not true!

JOHNNY B: [moodily:] Or maybe the Department of Water and Power needs a little more juice.

EL: That’s not it.

Johnny B stops and turns impatiently toward Billy and El.

JOHNNY B: Look, I don’t care. This place is all I need or want.

Billy and El listen.

JOHNNY B: No thunderstorms, very little water, and enough health and welfare from the Musician’s Guild to buy me groceries. I’m happy, alright?

Johnny B turns away and starts off.

EL: [perceptively:] And alone?

Billy looks at El, then Johnny B for his reaction. Johnny B stops, still turned away.

JOHNNY B: [intensely:] I got fried by twenty-thousand volts at my last rock concert, or don’t you remember? [turns back] I attract electricity now.

Billy and El listen – they do feel for him.

JOHNNY B: [intensely:] Lights dim when I walk into a room. My fingers spark. [holds up his fingers to remind them, then takes off his sunglasses:] My eyes glow. [stating it openly:] I’m a freak, huh? Do either of you know how that feels?

Billy looks up sharply at Johnny B's words; El frowns. Johnny B gives them a "Well?" expression. Billy and El share a look, then Billy gives El a “Yeah, you do, big guy” nod and moves out of the way. El sizes up Johnny B, wondering how he'll take what they're about to show him, then looks at Billy, who gives him a “Go ahead” smile. Johnny B waits, confused.

El presses the back of his neck and Johnny B watches as El shrinks out of sight. Johnny B is shocked - he was totally not expecting this. El stands inside his pile of clothes and waves up at Johnny B. Johnny B stares down at El, then over at Billy, trying to form words. Billy realizes Johnny B must be wondering about him now and holds up both hands with a quick chuckle.

BILLY: No. Whoa, no. No, no, no. This dude’s a regular guy.

Johnny B continues to look shocked.

========== 35:38 to 36:55 ==========

Interior – mall:

Chaos reigns. People are running to escape the destructiveness of Gloria’s TK – she’s sitting on the floor in a corner, damp and upset.

WOMAN'S VOICE: It’s the girl in the corner. Run!

MAN'S VOICE: Somebody stop her! She’s tearing the place apart!

Gloria uses her TK to make a chandelier swing back and forth – it comes loose and crashes to the ground. More people run. Ceiling debris rains down on the counter near Gloria.

Prelap: JOHNNY B: And you think this girl can help us spring Dr. Mom?

Prelap: EL: Her name’s Gloria Dinallo. She’s seventeen years old and telekinetic as all get out.

Gloria uses her TK to collapse a nearby booth. More people flee from the mall.

Exterior (daytime) – street:

Billy (driving), El, and Johnny B (lounging lengthwise in backseat) are in Billy’s convertible, driving down a street.

EL: No-one knows who her father is. But her mother says she’s from outer space, but she’s locked up in a mental ward in Camarillo.

The convertible acts funny as Billy parks it out front of the County Juvenile Correction Facility.

BILLY: What’s wrong with my car?

EL: Your generator light’s on.

BILLY: Generator light? I just put a new battery in last week. Wha—what’s sucking all the juice here?

Billy realizes and turns to look accusingly at Johnny B; El does the same. Johnny B understands their looks and lifts up his sunglasses – his eyes are glowing with electrical power.

JOHNNY B: [suspecting the answer is going to be ‘yes’:] Are they glowin’?

Billy turns away with an “I was right” expression.

EL: Regular sparklers.

Johnny B grimaces and puts his sunglasses back down.

EL: You sound funny too.

BILLY: Look, I don’t think we oughta risk taking Mr. Fourth of July inside, ya know?

Billy gets out and turns back.

BILLY: Why’n’t you guys stay here and see if you can recharge my battery, okay? [to Johnny B:] See if you can figure out which hand’s positive.

Johnny B points his hand warningly at Billy, but doesn't charge up.

BILLY: [with his hands raised defensively] Whoa! You wouldn’t pick on a guy that’s normal?

========== 36:55 to 37:46 ==========

Interior – County Juvenile Correction Facility:

Scanlon’s office:

Jane is defending Gloria’s actions.

JANE: [with feeling:] She’s as normal as we’re allowing her to be!

SCANLON: And you call what she did in that shopping mall normal?

JANE: Some girls dumped a bottle of perfume on her head. They teased her.

SCANLON: And that’s a normal response?

JANE: [angrily:] It sure as hell isn’t criminal!

Scanlon sighs; Jane tries to be calmer.

JANE: [appealing:] Look, Scanlon, all I know is that if you lock that kid up, everything I’ve done for her in the last three years is gonna be wasted.

Billy steps into the office unannounced and adds his two cents.

BILLY: And I think that’s the last thing any of us wants to see, huh?

Scanlon smiles and stands up; Jane stays where she is, not even turning toward Billy.

SCANLON: Dr. Hayes.

BILLY: Hey, Mr. Scanlon, how ya doin’?

Billy steps forward and shakes Scanlon’s proffered hand.

SCANLON: [reminding:] Bob.

BILLY: Bob, Bob, of course. [laughs] I knew that.

Jane rolls her eyes – she looks annoyed at Billy being here.

SCANLON: [to Billy:] And of course you know Gloria’s probation officer, Ms. Miller.

BILLY: Jane, Jane, Jane.

Jane holds up her hand to prevent Billy continuing, still refusing to look at him.

JANE: Forget it, Hayes.

Jane steps over to Scanlon’s inside window, shaking her head, as Billy protests.

BILLY: Jane, after everything we’ve been through, I—

SCANLON: [interrupts:] Excuse me, Doctor, but this visit wouldn’t have anything to do with Gloria, would it?

Jane turns from the window to look at Billy – the mention of Gloria overturning her wish to ignore Billy.

BILLY: Bob, you read my mind.

========== 37:46 to 38:20 ==========

Interior – County Juvenile Correction Facility:


A policewoman is leading Billy, Jane, and Scanlon to Gloria’s cell.

BILLY: It’s our standard thirty-thousand mile check-up. We give it to everyone we’ve tested.

JANE: Not with Gloria, you’re not. I want her to feel like a human being, not like some sort of a freak.

Billy, busy looking around as they walk, looks forward just in time to narrowly avoid “Caution: wet floor” sign.

JANE: [mostly to herself:] More tests at Humanidyne.

BILLY: It helped her last time, didn’t it?

Billy goes back to looking around (apparently having learned nothing from his narrow escape!).

JANE: This time it may set her back.

SCANLON: Three years? Ms. Miller, isn’t that a lot better than keeping her in here?

They reach Gloria’s cell and the policewoman unlocks it. Gloria looks up from where she’s sitting on her bed, looking miserable. Billy steps up and casually leans on the cell door.

BILLY: Hey, Glo. What’s the skinny, babe?

Gloria glares at Billy then looks over at a sink on the wall beside her. Billy follows her gaze, then looks quickly back at Gloria, wide-eyed. Gloria uses her TK to pull the sink free from the wall and send it straight for Billy, who reacts.

========== 38:20 to 38:41 ==========


Military Division lab and hallway:

BEEF: [in distress:] Aaaah!

Beef and Dr. Momquist are strapped to upright tables, both suffering; Strickland and General Thiel are outside the lab looking in, neither feeling for their victims in the least.

STRICKLAND: We’re using temperature extremes on him to test his limits.

GENERAL THIEL: Just make sure you don’t kill ‘im. Looks like you’re getting pretty close with Momquist.

Strickland and General Thiel turn away and start down the hallway.

GENERAL THIEL: You boys figure out who he tried to call yesterday?

STRICKLAND: [unconcerned:] Doesn’t matter, he was too drugged to talk.

In the lab, Beef and Dr. Momquist continue to suffer.

========== 38:41 to 39:39 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – street by beach:

Billy, El, and Jane are walking – Billy has an icepack held to his head.

JANE: [to Billy:] What’re you, crazy?! Where is your mind?!

BILLY: Under this icepack, screaming in pain. Haven’t you taught that girl any manners?

JANE: [angrily:] Hayes, this is a violation of her probation. If Scanlon finds out, she’s in jail and I’m out of a job!

BILLY: [sensibly:] She’d be in jail right this second if we hadn’t come along.

Jane stops and holds up her hands in surrender.

JANE: Alright. Alright!

Billy and El, a few paces ahead, stop and turn back.

JANE: I can’t fight you on that one.

Billy lowers the icepack in surprise - did he persuade her already?

JANE: Billy, look. She’s seventeen years old.

Billy and El listen.

JANE: [needing Billy to understand:] She’s a baby, and what you’re asking her to do is dangerous, and I’m just worried, that’s all.

Billy walks back to stand in front of Jane - she does need more persuading.

BILLY: Jane. This is Billy talking. Now look, I know what we’re asking is a lot here.

Jane crosses her arms.

BILLY: [earnestly:] But you’ve got to try to think of what an experience like this could do to help Gloria, too. Help her to use her powers constructively. To build her confidence, her self—her self esteem. To show her that being weird is… is special. That weird is okay.

Billy’s speech has an effect on Jane and she gives him an “I guess you’re right” smile. Billy and Jane turn and look off toward the beach.

========== 39:39 to 42:00 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – beach:

Johnny B and Gloria are walking barefoot, carrying their shoes - Johnny B is also carrying Gloria’s hat (how cute!). Gloria is just smiling shyly, not really looking at Johnny B.

JOHNNY B: So, Gloria, when did Hayes and Lincoln do their research number on you?

GLORIA: [mumbling:] A while ago.

Johnny B reacts with amusement.

JOHNNY B: [playfully:] I think you just answered the question, but I wouldn’t put money on it.

Gloria finally looks directly at Johnny B and does her answer over.

GLORIA: [clearly:] A year and a half ago.

JOHNNY B: [playfully:] Ah, she can talk. Terrific.

Gloria smiles at this.

JOHNNY B: [playfully:] Now I’m gonna talk back to you, and if we keep this going we’ll have a real conversation, okay?

Gloria nods her okay.

JOHNNY B: A year and a half ago, huh?

Gloria nods again.

JOHNNY B: [reflecting:] Yeah, they worked on me two years ago last July.

GLORIA: [looking at Johnny B with a wry smile:] I know.

JOHNNY B: [surprised:] You know?

Gloria nods.

JOHNNY B: You wanna tell me how?

GLORIA: [okay with admitting it:] I was at the concert when it happened. Jane took me there to see you.

Gloria gives Johnny B a smile, which he returns.

JOHNNY B: [surprised but pleased:] To see me?

Gloria nods, still smiling.

JOHNNY B: You’re kidding, right?

Gloria shakes her head - she doesn't think it's surprising, she thinks he's good enough to deserve it.

GLORIA: I like listening to your music. Still do.

JOHNNY B: [laughs slightly in disbelief] You mean you actually have one of our albums?

GLORIA: [nods, then admits with a shrug:] All three.

JOHNNY B: [grinning:] Ah, a collector.

GLORIA: [shrugs again] Guess so.

Johnny B and Gloria walk in silence for a moment.

GLORIA: [eagerly:] Are you ever going to make another one?

Johnny B looks down, reflecting on it before answering.


Gloria looks disappointed.

JOHNNY B: After the accident, I, uh... [looks out over the water before starting over] I don’t play much anymore.

Gloria feels sad for him.

At the water's edge behind Johnny B and Gloria, a surfer drops his board down and uses it to slide up onto the beach right beside them. They jump back as spray from the move splashes toward them. They tumble backwards onto the sand and Johnny B reaches for his foot in pain.

GLORIA: [to surfer, angrily:] Hey, watch it, buddy!

The surfer looks back like “What?” before continuing his surfing. Johnny B looks at his foot: there's a steaming burn where the water hit him.

GLORIA: [concerned:] Are you okay?

JOHNNY B: It’s the water.

GLORIA: Water did that?


Gloria glares in the direction of the surfer; Johnny B looks up from his foot and sees her glare. Gloria uses her TK to lift the surfer off his board. Johnny B reacts to this with surprise. Gloria lets the surfer fall and he lands heavily at the water's edge. Johnny B looks back at Gloria, who’s smiling in satisfaction. The surfer gets up, rubbing his backside, and looks around for his board in bewilderment.

JOHNNY B: Did you do that?

Gloria doesn’t answer, but it’s obvious from her smile that she was responsible. Johnny B watches the surfer retrieve his board, then looks back at Gloria with a laugh and a smile.

JOHNNY B: Guess you really are a delinquent.

Gloria smiles back.

========== 42:00 to 42:13 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – street by beach:

Billy and Jane watch Johnny B and Gloria run down the beach toward them. Jane, who looks happy at Gloria’s rapport with Johnny B, turns to Billy, ready to go ahead.

JANE: When do you wanna do it, Hayes?

Billy turns to look behind him at El, who grins.

========== 42:13 to 44:13 ==========

exterior (nighttime) - road:

The Misfits and Jane are ready for their rescue mission - they're heading for Humanidyne in an ice cream truck, the Fundae Sundae; the Fundae's jingle is playing merrily.

BILLY: Okay, gang, ready? Let’s run it down.

JANE: Check.

BILLY: Temperature monitoring?

EL: Yeah, we got it.

BILLY: Okay. Frozen candy bars?

JOHNNY B: [with mouth full:] Uh. Check.

BILLY: You’re not supposed to eat ‘em, B-Man.

JOHNNY B: I’m hungry.


Billy drives past the Humanidyne sign and stops at the main gate. Gate Guard walks up to the driver’s side as the Fundae’s jingle reaches the end of a run and Billy shuts it off.

BILLY: [to Gate Guard, as if it's just another day at work:] Hi, Tobie, how ya doin’? Running a nice special on Bingo Balls tonight.

GATE GUARD (TOBIE): Does this have somethin’ to do with another one of your experiments?

BILLY: No. Just like the tune.

GATE GUARD (TOBIE): [smiles, satisfied with this explanation] Oh. Well I heard they closed your division down.

BILLY: [laughs] Somebody better tell me, huh?

Gate Guard laughs, then waves to the other guard in the gatehouse that it’s okay to let the Fundae through.

BILLY: See ya later, Tobe.

Billy starts driving forward, then stops.

BILLY: Oh, hey, Tobie!

Gate Guard stops and waits; Billy leans out the window.

BILLY: Listen, I mean, what’s the deal here? Are they, uh, are they serious about all that “Shoot on sight” stuff at the Military Complex?

GATE GUARD (TOBIE): [laughs] Are you serious? Man, set foot near that place at night, buddy, you’ll be shaking hands with the undertaker.

BILLY: [still trying to sound casual:] Is that right? [reflects briefly on what this will mean to the plan] Okay! Just, uh... just curious.

Billy drives forward again and parks at the gate leading to the Military Complex. 2 armed MP’s step forward to block the way. Billy and El get out and approach the gate.

BILLY: [nonchalantly:] Evening.

MP #1: This area’s off limits at night, sir.

BILLY: [indicates his Misfits of Science jersey:] Well. Not for the company basketball team.

Billy turns to El, who smiles nervously and shows off his jersey; the MP’s wait for a further explanation

BILLY: Oh, wait. Didn’t anyone tell you guys?

The MP’s listen critically.

BILLY: Well, we’re having our first team meeting in the conference room, in the Military Complex. Level one.

El nods; the MP’s exchange glances, unconvinced.

BILLY: By the way, we’re looking for a new forward if you’ve got the right moves, ya know? [forces a laugh]

One of the MP's raises his gun.

MP #1: I’m going to need to see some ID.

BILLY: Sure. [turns to El] I—ID’s.

EL: ID’s.

BILLY: He needs to see some ID’s.

Billy pulls out his wallet, smiles quickly at the MP's, then flips through it.

BILLY: Okayyy. Um... Listen, what do you think about a— Will a Tina Turner Fan Club card do?

Both MP’s cock their guns. El closes his eyes; Billy raises his hands quickly.

BILLY: I guess not.

Suddenly both MP’s guns are telekinetically pulled out of their hands and dropped to Billy and El. Billy and El awkwardly catch the guns, then point them at the MP’s, who blink and raise their hands.

BILLY: Nice work, Glo.

Johnny B, Gloria, and Jane come from around the back of the Fundae and join Billy and El - they’re also wearing Misfits of Science uniforms and Johnny B is holding some rope for tying up the MP's.

JOHNNY B: [complaining:] Hayes, I feel ridiculous wearing this thing! [takes off his sunglasses:] I mean, just because you had ‘em lyin' around.

BILLY: [a little annoyed to be the only one who gets what the uniforms are about:] We’re a team, B-Man. The uniforms, they help us think like a team. [admitting:] Besides, I had ‘em lying around.

========== 44:13 to 45:06 ==========



Strickland and General Thiel are in another meeting with the Joint Chiefs of Staff.

SENATOR DONNER: There is a huge groundswell – both in this country and abroad – that opposes this weapon.

GENERAL THIEL: [laughs] We hear the Russkies are shakin’ in their boots.

SENATOR DONNER: Seems everyone is, General. Now, [laughs] you know – and I know – that we—we don’t actually use nuclear weapons. What we do, is we stockpile them. At least, that’s the theory here. Isn’t it?

Strickland and General Thiel wait without answering.

SENATOR DONNER: [answering his own question:] Course it is. [laughs nervously] And, uh— [clears his throat] Now, if we’re going to sell this theory to the people, what we’ve got to do is, we’ve got to show that this stockpile – this—this bunker, where you’re going to actually keep this thing, is secure. See that’s—that’s your basic PR there.

General Thiel rolls his eyes.

========== 45:06 to 47:11 ==========

Exterior (nighttime) – Humanidyne grounds:

outside Military Division:

The Fundae backs up to the Military Division building. As it parks, Johnny B raises the Fundae’s back door from the inside. He and the others get out and collect at the back of the Fundae. Billy rubs his hands together in anticipation, looking toward the doors of the building they need to break into.

BILLY: Okay, alright. [turns to face the others] ‘Kay, you guys ready?

The others shuffle their feet instead of answering.

BILLY: [chiding:] You know, I was hoping for a little bit more enthusiasm here. Okay?

The others exchange looks.

BILLY: ‘Cause, I’m pretty darn excited about this plan.

Billy starts walking backwards to the doors while explaining why.

BILLY: Okay? ‘Cause we—we’re ready. We’re a team. And we’re organized.

Billy arrives at the doors, turns and pulls on them – they don’t budge.

BILLY: [adds his final point, with less enthusiasm:] And we’ve covered all the bases.

JOHNNY B: It’s locked?!

BILLY: [to himself, with a grimace:] It’s locked!

The others lose what little enthusiasm they didn’t have. But Billy bounces back - rejoins them, improvising a new plan.

BILLY: That’s okay! That’s okay. We’ll blast through it.

EL: That’s gonna set the alarm off, Billy.

BILLY: [dismissively:] We’ll just move that much faster. B-Man, you got any juice?

Johnny B swaggers forward and lifts his sunglasses to reveal his eyes are glowing.

JOHNNY B: Is Springsteen ‘The Boss’?

BILLY: [smiles] Okay.

Billy puts his hand on Johnny B’s shoulder as Johnny B drops his sunglasses back down.

BILLY: Look, just try to keep the thunder down, okay, babe?

Billy joins the others; Johnny B gets ready to blast the doors.

EL: Okay, everybody get back.

Everybody but Johnny B collects at the side of the Fundae, out of the way but still watching. Johnny B clasps his hands together in his firing position and they start to glow. He fires off a bolt, which blasts the doors – loudly and spectacularly, with sparks and white smoke. The others react and an alarm starts sounding – also loudly and accompanied by flashing lights.

JOHNNY B: [awed by his own power:] Wow.

BILLY: [calls:] B-Man, you okay?

The smoke clears as Johnny B lowers his arms and turns to the others.

JOHNNY B: [grinning] I had a little trouble with the thunder.

Billy shakes his head; Gloria smiles.

EL: [sighs:] Let’s go.

Everyone heads for the doors, Jane last in line.

BILLY: [calls:] Jane, get Beef’s stuff.

Jane grabs the stuff from the back of the Fundae, then runs to where the others are standing. El looks through the blasted-open doors to the lobby inside.

EL: Oh no.

JANE: What’s wrong?

El gestures inside: the sprinklers are going like crazy and the floor is already covered in water.

EL: The heat from the door meltdown set off the sprinklers.


JOHNNY B: So I walk in there, I’m a french fry.

EL: That’s right, it’ll completely short out his system.

JANE: So, how do we get in the lab?

BILLY: We’ll improvise. Come on, let’s go.

Billy heads into the lobby.

EL: Improvise. Uh, Johnny B, pull the truck into the lobby, we’ll be back in a couple of minutes.

El and Jane follow Billy, who’s heading through an inner door marked “West Wing”. Jane turns back to wait for Gloria. Gloria hangs back, looking worriedly at Johnny B.

JOHNNY B: [giving Gloria an assuring nod:] It’ll be okay.

JANE: Gloria.

JOHNNY B: Go on.

Gloria glances at Jane.

JANE: Come on, come on.

Gloria does so, with one last glance toward Johnny B, and Jane pulls her toward the West Wing door. Johnny B waits.

========== 47:11 to 47:35 ==========



The meeting is still going on.

STRICKLAND: Senator Donner, we understand your concerns. And I can assure you that the name “Humanidyne” and the word “security” are synonymous.

A phone rings in front of Strickland and he picks it up.

STRICKLAND: [into phone:] Yes? ... What? ... Oh.

Strickland hangs up.

SENATOR DONNER: Something wrong, Doctor?

STRICKLAND: [not able to believe it:] There’s just been a break-in in the Military Division.

General Thiel stands up quickly.

========== 47:35 to 48:00 ==========


military division guard area:

Billy, El, Gloria, and Jane (all of them soaking wet) arrive at the guard area, running. 2 MP’s run up to block their path.

MP #2: Hold it!

The group screeches to a halt.

EL: Glo?

BILLY: Great idea. [turns to Gloria] Glo, got a minute?

Gloria smiles and steps forward. She uses her TK to lift the 2 surprised MP’s to the ceiling, then starts them spinning in circles.

MP's: Aaahh! What’re you doing?!

BILLY: [to Gloria, while looking up at MP’s:] Nice move. You gonna do this at parties?

EL: Keep ‘em breaking, Glo. We’ll be right back.

Billy, El, and Jane head for the lab; Gloria stays and keeps the MP’s spinning in circles.

MP's: Hey, wait a minute. Get back here. Get us down!

========== 48:00 to 48:43 ==========


Military Division lab and hallway:

Billy, El, and Jane run up and stop outside the lab where Beef is being held prisoner. Beef is strapped to an upright table - he's wearing a silver suit that covers him from head to toe.

JANE: Is that him?

BILLY: [trying the keypad for opening the lab door:] Yeah.

JANE: What’s he wearing?

EL: We call it a refrigeration suit.

BILLY: [trying the keypad again:] It’s gonna make our job a whole lot easier.

El notices Dr. Momquist is inside the lab, too – unconscious on a table.

EL: Billy.

BILLY: [still busy with the keypad:] Yeah?

EL: That’s Dr. Mom.

Billy looks then turns to El, who spots a button marked “door” on the inside of the lab.

EL: There’s a door button inside.

Billy and Jane look at it.

JANE: [shrugs] Yeah? So who’s gonna push it?

El reaches up to a small window above the lab door.

EL: I am.

Jane gives El a “What do you mean?” look; Billy looks at El, too. El reaches behind his head, squeezing his eyes shut as he presses the back of his neck. Jane watches El shrink, so shocked she drops Beef's stuff. Billy looks at Jane, who turns a “Something you forgot to tell me, maybe?” glare on him.

BILLY: I told you about that, right? [decides he must have and turns quickly back to the keypad] Yeah, I told you.

========== 48:43 to 49:02 ==========

Exterior (nighttime) – humanidyne grounds:

Soldiers in jeeps are on their way to the Military Division; up above on a catwalk, Strickland, General Thiel, Senator Donner, and a few others from the conference room are also heading to the site of the break-in.

STRICKLAND: This is just what we needed.

GENERAL THIEL: [to MP following him:] How the deuce did they get in?

MP: The MP’s who met them are pretty shaken up, sir. I mean, they’re talkin’ lightning bolts and guns that fly.

GENERAL THIEL: Did they get a description of the aggressor?

MP: Yes, sir.

Everyone present stops to look at MP.


MP: [looking at each man in turn] Three men, one woman, and a teenage girl. In an ice cream truck.

General Thiel gives MP a hard, disbelieving look.


========== 49:02 to 49:20 ==========


Military Division lab and hallway:

Billy uses a mop to knock off the covering over the small window above the lab door - it falls to the floor inside the lab. Billy hands the mop to Jane then reaches down for El.

BILLY: [reassuringly:] Alright, El. Now look, heights are no problem as long as you don’t think about it.

Billy lifts El up to the window ledge.

BILLY: Alright, just— Alright ta-take it— Be careful.

El turns to look down inside the lab: the floor is a long way down!

EL: Whoa!

BILLY: [to Jane:] Alright, hand me the yarn.

JANE: Okay.

========== 49:20 to 49:23 ==========


military division guard area:

Gloria is still guarding the MP’s, who are still spinning on the ceiling.

MP’s: Whoa! Aaah!

Gloria looks at her watch.

========== 49:23 to 49:28 ==========

Exterior (nighttime) – Humanidyne grounds:

outside Military Division:

Johnny B waits in the driver’s seat of the Fundae, which is parked inside the blasted door frame. He leans forward to look into the lobby: the West Wing door is still closed and the sprinklers are still pouring down. He leans back in the seat, impatiently frustrated.

========== 49:26 to 50:45 ==========


Military Division lab and hallway:

Jane is holding onto the end of the yarn that's hanging down from the window ledge; Billy looks up toward El.

BILLY: Just jump right off there, El.

EL: Jump?! What’re you, crazy?! [tightens the knot on the yarn around his waist] Jump. No, no jumping. J-Jane, you’re going to lower me down, slowly. Got that?

BILLY: [impatiently:] Go, El. Jump, will ya?

El inches backwards to the edge.

EL: Okay. Okay. I’m going.

El puts one leg over the side.

EL: Okay. Hold on!

El puts his other leg over the side and starts down.

EL: Okay, that’s good. Be real easy now.

BILLY: Okay, there you go.

Jane starts lowering El down slowly.

BILLY: You got it. Just a little lower now.

Billy and Jane watch through the lab door as Jane lowers El further.

BILLY: That’s it.

EL: [mostly to himself:] All the things I let you talk me into...

BILLY: See? You’re doing fine, El. Go. Oka— Go. Okay. Alright, a little bit more. Alright sw-swing. [demonstrating:] Just sw-swing. Swing. Come on, just like in grade school now.

El starts swinging back and forth, with his feet aimed at the door button.

BILLY: [still demonstrating:] You got it.

El continues to swing back and forth, gathering momentum.

EL: [psyching himself up:] For the benefit of man... and science.

El keeps swinging until he has enough force built up, then he goes for it!

EL: Aaah!

Jane cringes as El's feet connect with the door button.

BILLY: Alright.

The lab door whooshes opens and Billy enters.

BILLY: Forget roundball, man. You got a career as a trapeze artist.

Jane keeps hold of the yarn as Billy takes hold of El.

JANE: [to Billy:] Alright, ya got it?

BILLY: [takes the yarn from Jane] Yeah, got it.

EL: Hey, Bill, buddy. Come on, get this thing off me, okay?

BILLY: I’m untying ya, I’m untying ya. Relax.

Jane sweeps El’s clothes into a corner with the mop.

BILLY: Jane, check out Dr. Mom here, get him unplugged.

Billy sets El down on the table that Dr. Momquist is on.

BILLY: El, you see if you can get ‘im to talk.

========== 50:45 to 50:51 ==========

Exterior (nighttime) – Humanidyne grounds:

Strickland, General Thiel, and MP are still heading to check on the break-in.

GENERAL THIEL: [to MP:] What kind of military detachment you boys got here?

MP: A full company, sir.

GENERAL THIEL: Well bring ‘em on out and surround the place.

========== 50:51 to 51:30 ==========


Military Division lab:

El is trying to wake Dr. Momquist.

EL: Dr. Momquist! Yo, Dr. Mom, can you hear me? Dr. Mom, it’s Lincoln. It’s El. Yo, hello. Over here.

Dr. Momquist stirs and opens his eyes.

DR. MOMQUIST: [groggily:] Lincoln?

EL: Wha-what are they doing to you? What’s happened?

DR. MOMQUIST: [struggling to speak:] Neutron Beam.

El looks around for said Neutron Beam.

DR. MOMQUIST: They built it. It’s real.

EL: [aghast:] The Neutron Beam is real?

DR. MOMQUIST: Save it, El. [breathing heavily:] Save the world.

Dr. Momquist lifts his head to look at El. His eyes bug when he sees El's tiny form standing at his shoulder, and he faints dead away.

EL: Dr. Mom! Dr. Mom!

========== 51:30 to 51:52 ==========

Exterior (nighttime) – Humanidyne grounds:

Amidst continued military activity, MP joins Strickland and General Thiel, who are awaiting his report.

MP: Front gate says the truck was driven in by Dr. Hayes and Dr. Lincoln.

MP leaves; Strickland and General Thiel look off toward where the Fundae is parked.

GENERAL THIEL: What do you suppose they’re after?

STRICKLAND: Biefneiter. And... Momquist.

Strickland and General Thiel exchange a look.

GENERAL THIEL: [simply:] Well, they’re not gettin’ out of here alive.

========== 51:52 to 52:13 ==========


Military Division lab:

Billy looks up from helping Jane to adjust Beef on a gurney for transport, to see how El is faring with Dr. Momquist.

BILLY: [with concern:] Hey, El, man wha— What’s the matter with him? He looks dead.

Billy joins El at Dr. Momquist's table.

EL: Took one look at me and he fainted.

Billy takes Dr. Momquist’s pulse.

EL: Bad news, Billy. The Neutron Beam? It’s real.

Billy looks at El in shock.

EL: Strickland’s hiding it in the desert bunker.

BILLY: [realizing:] And Dr. Mom found out about him.

EL: Listen to this: If we don’t get out of here, they’re going to do the same thing to us.

Billy holds open his partially-zipped sweatshirt and reaches for El.

BILLY: Say hello to my sweatshirt, man.

========== 52:13 to 52:18 ==========


military division guard area:

Gloria is still guarding the MP’s, who are still spinning on the ceiling.

MP’s: Ohhh! Ahhh! I don’t feel so good.

Gloria looks at her watch again, then around the corner toward the West Wing door.

========== 52:18 to 52:45 ==========

Exterior (nighttime) – Humanidyne grounds:

outside Military Division:

More jeeps arrive out front of the Military Division building. In the Fundae, Johnny B checks the lobby again, then looks over at the approaching jeeps. He gets out and walks to the front of the Fundae, watching the jeeps (filled with soldiers and big guns) form a battle line. He swallows nervously and glances back toward the lobby again, hoping the others come soon.

========== 52:45 to 52:58 ==========


Military Division lab:

Billy rejoins Jane at Beef's gurney.

BILLY: [directing:] Alright. Jane, you drive Dr. Mom. I’ll take Beef.

JANE: Okay.

Jane heads for Dr. Momquist but Beef suddenly raises his arm and groans loudly, making her jump back.

BILLY: [holds out his hand] Quick, get out the Snickers.

JANE: The Snickers?

BILLY: You forgot the Snickers?!

Billy gestures to Jane to forget it and keep moving.

BEEF: [angrily:] Amelia!

BILLY: [to Jane:] Go, go, go. Come on, let’s go!

Jane hurries to comply; Billy starts pushing the gurney with Beef toward the door.

BEEF: [angrily:] Amelia!

BILLY: [to himself:] Aww, great.

========== 52:58 to 54:21 ==========

Exterior (nighttime) – Humanidyne grounds:

outside Military Division:

The soldiers are exiting the jeeps and positioning themselves to fire at the intruders. Johnny B looks on nervously, then notices an electric generator nearby with a “DANGER: HIGH VOLTAGE” sign. He looks from it to the soldiers, an idea forming. He checks the lobby one last time. There’s no sign that the others are coming yet, so he turns back to the soldiers – it’s up to him to hold them off. He starts to sing, under his breath but with growing conviction.

JOHNNY B: [singing:] Maybe someday you will be a man. And you will be the leader of a rock ‘n’ roll band.

The soldiers continue positioning themselves.

JOHNNY B: [singing:] Many people comin’ from miles around, to hear you play your music till the sun goes down. [glances at the generator again] Maybe someday your name will be in lights. Saying, “Johnny B. Goode gonna play tonight”.

(“Johnny B. Goode” opening music bursts out.)

Johnny B removes his sunglasses and takes a couple of quick breaths, fully geared up for what he’s going to do. The soldiers fire some shots as Johnny B sprints over to the generator and pauses beside it to play a couple of air-guitar chords.

up on catwalk:

Strickland, General Thiel, Senator Donner, and MP arrive at a look-out post on the catwalk and look down at the action going on out front of the Military division building.

outside Military Division:

Johnny B jumps off the slanted side of the building, spinning around to land at the generator. He grabs onto the two leads that are attached to either side of the generator and starts absorbing the electricity into his body, singing with energy now.

JOHNNY B: [singing:] Deep down in Louisiana, down in New Orleans. Way back up in the woods among the evergreens.

The soldiers fire off more rounds as Johnny B continues to pull power from the generator.

JOHNNY B: [singing:] There stood an old cabin made of earth and wood. Where lived a country boy named Johnny B. Goode. Who never, ever learned to read and write so well, but he could play guitar so hard it’d ring your bell. Go, go!

Fully charged, his eyes looking different because of the electricity, Johnny B leaps sideways from the generator. He drops to one knee and fires a bolt, aiming for one of the jeeps where the soldiers are firing from. The bolt strikes, sending up sparks and a plume of white smoke.

JOHNNY B: [singing:] Go, Johnny, go, go, go!

Johnny B moves and fires again. The bolt hits the next jeep, creating more sparks and smoke.

JOHNNY B: [singing:] Go, Johnny, go, go, go! Go, Johnny, go, go, go!

up on catwalk:

Strickland, General Thiel, and Senator Donner look on.

SENATOR: [slowly, amazed:] My God.

outside Military Division:

Johnny B moves and fires again. The bolt hits another jeep.

JOHNNY B: [singing:] Go, go, go. Whoa, Johnny B. Goode.

========== 54:21 to 54:40 ==========


Military Division hallway:

(Instrumental to “Johnny B. Goode” still plays.)

Billy and Jane are pushing the 2 gurneys with Beef and Dr. Momquist.

BILLY: [still harping on Jane’s mistake:] I can’t believe you forgot the candy bars.

JANE: [annoyed:] I said I was sorry. Okay?

military division guard area:

Billy and Jane return to where Gloria is, and drive the 2 gurneys under the MP’s on the ceiling.

BILLY: Glo, you wanna release the Thompson Twins and let’s go?

Gloria releases the MP’s and follows Billy and Jane to the hallway that leads to the West Wing door. The MP's land on the floor, dropping their guns and sticks.

MP’s: Aaah. Unh. Ow. Whoa.

The MP’s try unsuccessfully to stand, calling after the retreating intruders.

MP’s: Hey, hey! You come back! Oof.

The MP’s fall dizzily to the ground.

========== 54:40 to 54:52 ==========

Exterior (nighttime) – Humanidyne grounds:

outside Military Division:

(Instrumental to “Johnny B. Goode” still plays.)

Johnny B is still busy! He leaps onto the slanted side of the building, turns around and fires a bolt. The bolt hits a jeep.

up on catwalk:

General Thiel watches with longing.

GENERAL THIEL: [shaking head:] What that boy could do for an army.

outside Military Division:

Johnny B dances back to the generator as the soldiers continue to fire. He grabs onto the smoking generator, readying for an electric encore.

========== 54:52 to 55:15 ==========


west wing hallway:

(Instrumental to “Johnny B. Goode” still plays.)

Billy, Gloria, and Jane (Billy and Jane pushing the 2 gurneys with Beef and Dr. Momquist) are almost at the West Wing door when suddenly Beef yells, stopping the procession.

BEEF: [angrily:] Aaargh!

Billy moves back quickly as Beef starts getting off the gurney.

BILLY: Whoa—whoa!

Billy reaches to stop Beef from getting up.

BILLY: Stay on the gurney, Beef, no. Beef—

Beef stands and shakes Billy off, pushing him against the wall.

BILLY: Okay, hey— Why’n’t you just get off there? You probably wanna stretch a little bit.

Beef starts walking back the way they’ve come as Billy heads the opposite way, gesturing for Beef to follow.

BILLY: We’ll go walk out to the truck. Beef, this way.

Beef ignores Billy and continues walking.

BILLY: No, no, no.

Jane and Gloria watch.

BILLY: No, no. Beef, this way.

Beef stops and starts to turn back.

BILLY: [still gesturing:] Here we— There ya go. Beef, we’re going to the truck.

But Beef is thinking about something else.

BEEF: [yells:] Ameliaaaa!

Jane flinches slightly at Beef’s yell.

JANE: [to Billy:] Who’s Amelia?

Billy looks at Jane, then at Beef, then back to Jane – and gets an idea!

BILLY: [pointing at Jane:] You are!

JANE: Huh?

========== 55:15 to 55:18 ==========

Exterior (nighttime) – Humanidyne grounds:

outside Military Division:

(Instrumental to “Johnny B. Goode” still plays.)

Johnny B runs along the slanted side of the building, turns around and fires a bolt. The bolt hits a jeep.

========== 55:18 to 55:41 ==========


west wing hallway:

(Instrumental to “Johnny B. Goode” still plays.)

Billy is putting his idea into play.

BILLY: Here she is, Beefy.

Beef listens.

BILLY: I brought her here for you.

Jane isn’t convinced it’s a good idea.

JANE: [demanding quickly:] For him? What are you doing, Hayes?

BILLY: [to Jane:] Lead him out to the truck, okay?

Jane looks away and shakes her head, quickly and firmly. Billy steps closer to her.

BILLY: Look, you forgot the candy bars, you play along, okay?

Billy steps back to Beef and gestures to Jane.

BILLY: Hey, w—we found her for you, Beef. It’s Amelia! Amelia, Beef.

Jane looks back, watching Beef warily.

BEEF: [to Jane:] Amelia?

Jane swallows nervously, but Billy is only focusing on the fact that his plan is working.

BILLY: [happily:] That’s it! That’s it, big guy. [to Jane:] Wave to him.

Jane shakes her head vigorously.

BILLY: [impatiently:] Wave to him.

Jane smiles quickly at Beef, then waves with another quick smile.


========== 55:41 to 55:48 ==========

Exterior (nighttime) – Humanidyne grounds:

outside Military Division:

(Instrumental to “Johnny B. Goode” still plays.)

The soldiers are trying to close in. Johnny B pushes off of the generator (having just recharged), does a spinning jump, lands, and fires a bolt at the soldiers. The bolt hits the ground near the soldiers, causing them to retreat.

========== 55:48 to 56:02 ==========


west wing hallway:

(Instrumental to “Johnny B. Goode” still plays.)

Billy’s plan is in full swing.

BILLY: [to Beef:] Amelia is going out to the truck now.

Jane stares openmouthed, still unsure about this whole “Amelia” thing.

BILLY: [to Beef:] Why’n’t you come along? She, uh… [with a vague gesture at Beef and a glance at Jane:] You guys can talk. [starts for the West Wing door] And you can have a great time, so just keep— [lifts Jane's hand into a waving position as he passes her] Wave. Wave, Amelia.

Billy and Gloria leave, pushing gurney with Dr Momquist. Beef walks closer to Jane, a big smile on his face. Jane gives a high-pitched nervous laugh and moves backwards. Beef pushes his empty gurney out of the way with a crash, causing Jane to jump.

========== 56:02 to 58:54 ==========

Exterior (nighttime) – Humanidyne grounds:

outside Military Division:

(Instrumental to “Johnny B. Goode” still plays.)

Gloria rounds the back of the Fundae and looks into the cab, closely followed by Billy.

GLORIA: Johnny?

Johnny B isn’t in the Fundae, so Gloria and Billy step out front and see the shocking scene that's taking place: Johnny B taking on an army by himself!

GLORIA: Johnny!

Johnny B leaps off the slanted side of the building and fires a bolt in midair. The bolt hits between two jeeps.

BILLY: Whoa! This is serious. [calls:] B-Man, are you kidding?! Get in the truck!

Johnny B pulls more juice from the generator.

BILLY: [calls:] What are you doing, man? Come on!

Johnny B looks toward Billy and Gloria and answers matter-of-factly.

JOHNNY B: Givin’ the crewcuts a concert.

The soldiers fire another hail of bullets and Billy tugs on Gloria’s arm.

BILLY: Come on, come on, let’s get outta here.

Gloria complies by heading for the back of the Fundae while Billy calls impatiently to Johnny B.

BILLY: Come on!

Johnny B moves away from the generator and fires a bolt. The bolt hits a jeep. Johnny B runs toward the Fundae.


Billy and Jane are using Snickers to tempt Beef toward the Fundae.

BILLY: Look, Beef. Amelia’s got a candy bar for you, but if you want it, you gotta get in the truck. Okay? [to Jane:] Keep ‘im comin’.

Billy climbs in the back of the Fundae as Beef lumbers closer, reaching for the Snickers in Jane’s hand.

BEEF: [sweetly:] Amelia.

JANE: [rushed:] Come and get it, Beef, it’s in the freezer.

Jane quickly climbs in the back of the Fundae as well.

up on catwalk:

Strickland, General Thiel, Senator Donner and MP look on.

STRICKLAND: They’re coming out.


Billy holds a Snickers out the back of the Fundae.

BILLY: Here ya go, Beef. Here, it’s right here.

Billy drops the Snickers into the open freezer. Beef climbs in the Fundae, reaching for the Snickers, and goes headfirst into the freezer after it.

up on catwalk:

GENERAL THIEL: [to MP:] Give that truck a couple of mortars.

MP: [into radio:] Artillery, we need a mortar at the door.


Beef chews a bite of his Snickers blissfully, sitting up in the freezer. Seconds later, as before, the frozen candy bar knocks him out. He falls backward into the freezer – it’s a perfect fit – and Billy closes it.

BILLY: Great. We’re outta here.

JANE: [worriedly:] Hayes, what happens when he wakes up?

Billy hops outside and reaches up to close the back door of the Fundae.

BILLY: You’ll think of something.

JANE: I don’t like the sound of—

Billy closes the door, cutting Jane off, and leaves.

JANE: [yelling after Billy:] Hayes!

Jane drops her head against the back window in frustration.

Billy gets into the driver’s seat of the Fundae - Johnny B is already standing in passenger side.

BILLY: [muttering:] Oh boy.

Gloria and Jane come through the curtain that separates the back.

GLORIA: [glancing around:] Where’s El?

BILLY: Where’s El? [realizes:] Oh.

Billy reaches down inside his partially-zipped sweatshirt (where El's been stashed for the last few minutes) and pulls El out.

BILLY: [to El:] Sorry, bud.

Gloria gasps – she, like Jane, hadn’t known that El could shrink.

GLORIA: Oh my—

Billy lays El on the dashboard; El quickly stands up and faces Billy reproachfully.

EL: [miffed:] Well, it’s about time! Don’t you ever do that to me again. Now where are my clothes?

JANE: Your clothes?

Billy gives Jane a “You forgot those, too?” look, which Jane returns with a look of "Yes, okay?”. Suddenly the Fundae is lit up and rocked by the mortar exploding nearby – everybody jumps and looks outside.

JOHNNY B: Let’s bolt.

Billy starts the Fundae quickly and it lurches forward - the others catch their footing and Jane gives a short scream.

up on catwalk:

Those on the catwalk see the Fundae pulling out - the mortar hasn't deterred the intruders. General Thiel runs across the catwalk, followed closely by Strickland and Senator Donner.

GENERAL THIEL: [yells, pointing at escaping Fundae:] Block that truck!

Down below, the soldiers scramble to do so.

GENERAL THIEL: [yells:] Go! Set up a roadblock!

The Fundae drives on.


El, no longer shrunk, struggles in the confines of the crowded cab to get Johnny B's leather jacket wrapped around himself with Johnny B's help.

EL: [to Billy, annoyed:] I can’t believe you forgot my clothes.

BILLY: I’m sorry, okay?

(Substitute ‘clothes’ with ‘candy bars’ and it sounds a lot like the exchange between Billy and Jane earlier, wouldn’t you say?)

El squats down between Billy and Johnny B.

JOHNNY B: [glancing out the windshield:] They’re blockin’ the road, Hayes.

EL: [firmly:] I’m not getting out of this truck naked.

Billy doesn't comment - his focus is on getting his team out of the present danger.

BILLY: Jane, Glo, get in the back.

JANE: Yeah.

Jane and Gloria go back through the curtain.

BILLY: B-Man, you got enough for another blast?

Johnny B grins.

humanidyne grounds

A mortar explodes on the pavement in front of the Fundae, but Billy keeps on driving.


Johnny B leans out and fires a bolt.

humanidyne grounds

The bolt hits a jeep. The soldiers at the roadblock in the Fundae’s path fire as it comes closer. The Fundae doesn't slow down, so the soldiers are forced to scatter.


Gloria peeks back out between the curtain. Everyone hangs on for the bumpy ride.

humanidyne grounds:

The Fundae drives straight for the gate of the Military Complex; the soldiers in front leap aside. The Misfits and Jane brace themselves as the Fundae plows right through the gate.

up on catwalk:

Strickland, General Thiel, and Senator Donner watch the escaping Fundae, then turn away.

SENATOR DONNER: Well, gentlemen, I think you’re going to have to do a little face-saving tomorrow.


El gives an amazed “We actually did it?” laugh and looks at Billy, then laughs again. Jane smiles, but looks around in surprise.

JANE: That’s it?

Everyone realizes the significance: they’ve done it! The celebratory mood escalates and everyone starts smiling and laughing, except Billy, who's too worn out to join in fully. Jane pounds Billy on the back happily, and Billy allows himself a small "Yeah, we were great" smile. El slumps against Billy with relief as they continue driving on to the main gate. Johnny B and Gloria share a kiss and everybody congratulates each other with hugs and pats on the back.

humanidyne grounds:

(Instrumental to “Johnny B. Goode” fades off.)

Gate Guard comes out of the gatehouse as the Fundae approaches. The Fundae crashes through the gate without slowing down, Gate Guard waves after the disappearing Fundae in slight shock. The Fundae leaves Humanidyne grounds - its jingle playing and everyone inside laughing happily.

========== 58:54 to 1:00:05 ==========

TV is showing live footage of crowds in major cities as Newscaster talks.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] You’re viewing live pictures from Paris, New York, Moscow, and London. Of what has become the largest spontaneous protest against a new military weapon.

Footage shrinks and disappears into top right corner and Newscaster is now visible.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] The Neutron Beam has yet to be built, but the first step towards its construction will take place if its California storage bunker passes security testing today. Correspondent Cindy Saunders is there now.

TV cuts to show footage of the desert bunker site.

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

news crew area:

Cindy, reporting live, and Senator Donner are standing with a news crew. The site is aswarm with soldiers and military vehicles.

CINDY: [to news camera:] The riverside mesa that will house the Neutron Beam is currently under assault, as it has been all morning. So far, the Army Green Berets, a special squadron of the Air Force, and the Navy SEALS have been unable to make it past the bunker’s secret water barrier. And from the looks of the reinforcements going in now, the Marines are having the same kind of luck. Senator Donner.

Cindy holds her microphone out to Senator Donner.

SENATOR DONNER: Well. [clears throat] Obviously we’re impressed. Frankly, this morning I had my doubts.

CINDY: I think you’re referring to our other top news story today, which was the break-in of the high-security military complex at Humanidyne last night. Done by a group of subversives called the Misfits of Science.

Cindy holds her microphone back out to Senator Donner.

SENATOR DONNER: Uh, well, it was a bit of a, uh, how shall I say this? Uh, a shock, yes, a shock, to see five people in basketball uniforms get past all that manpower.

Senator Donner trails off with a slight laugh, then clears his throat in embarrassment; Cindy laughs, too.

========== 1:00:05 to 1:00:50 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – outside small convenience store:

A farmer gets out of his pickup and enters the store. Atop the parked Fundae, Johnny B is checking out the freezer unit. He calls down a damage report to El and Dr. Momquist. (El is barefoot and has on the white hospital shirt Dr. Momquist was in earlier and gray sweats from a Misfits of Science uniform; Dr. Momquist has had to borrow Jane’s pink Misfits of Science jacket.)

JOHNNY B: Looks like they used this freezer unit for target practice. There’s no way it’s gonna work now.

El sighs and turns to Dr. Momquist.

EL: How much further to the desert bunker?

DR. MOMQUIST: About five miles up the next dirt road.

EL: [holds up corners of hospital shirt:] I feel ridiculous in this.

Johnny B smiles at this (after all, he had the same complaint last night).

EL: Absolutely ridiculous. Well, Billy better find something.

Farmer exits the store, heading for its outside freezer.

EL: Johnny?


EL: Where’d Jane and Glo go?

JOHNNY B: They went to the ladies’ room. I told ‘em we’d keep an eye on—

Johnny B breaks off as he notices Farmer; El and Dr. Momquist follow Johnny B's gaze.

JOHNNY B: Aw, no.

Farmer opens the door of the store's freezer – this is where Beef has been put to keep him cool! Farmer bends down to get something and notices Beef’s feet. He slowly looks up, his mouth falling open in surprise, until he’s facing Beef. Beef smiles broadly. Farmer backs off slowly, pushing back his hat as he tries to take in this strange sight.

========== 1:00:50 to 1:01:54 ==========

Interior – small convenience store:

TV behind the counter is running the “other top news story” (about the Misfits' break-in at Humanidyne) while Billy shops - what bad timing!

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] …wearing basketball uniforms, proclaiming themselves to be the Misfits of Science. Where the name comes from isn’t known...

Billy sets a 48-count box of Snickers on the counter.

COUNTER WOMAN: [surprised:] You’re gonna eat the whole box?

BILLY: [thinks quickly] Uh, chocolate attack.

Counter Woman accepts this excuse and gets out a brown bag for Billy’s purchases.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] ...but an unnamed source in the Pentagon believes that the Misfits of Science pink and black uniforms tie them directly to the rose red and black colors of the dreaded Black September Organization.

Billy hears the TV and quickly zips up his sweatshirt to cover the “Misfits of Science” logo and turns away from the counter – but now the back of his sweatshirt is facing Counter Woman, with the “Misfits of Science” logo on it in big pink letters!

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] The source is quoted as saying that black is...

Counter Woman starts putting clothes in the bag.

COUNTER WOMAN: These are extra extra large.

Billy turns back to face Counter Woman and she holds up some other clothes.

COUNTER WOMAN: These are real small.

Counter Woman gives Billy a critical look as she puts the clothes in the bag.

COUNTER WOMAN: Don’t think you’re gonna get into ‘em.

BILLY: [thinks quickly again] Gifts. For friends.

Counter Woman gives Billy another critical look before putting a pair of shoes in the bag.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] There have, however, been speculations as to their political leanings, ranging from the Scouts to the DAR. The members of the group are believed to be led by a Dr. William Hayes.

Billy, holding a yo-yo in a package, looks toward the TV and freezes – a photo of him is filling the screen!

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] Formerly head of Humanidyne’s Human Investigation Team, Hayes is believed to have ties to subversive organizations.

Billy hands the yo-yo to Counter Woman, then takes a red cap from a rack and puts it on, pulling it low over his eyes.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] A spokesman for the F.B.I. reports that Hayes was known for his unconventional behavior in medical school in the Caribbean.

Counter Woman looks from the photo of Billy that's showing on the TV, over to Billy. She just gives him a look and then reads the price off the register.

COUNTER WOMAN: Sixty-eight seventy-two.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] Rumored to have taken numerous off-island boating expeditions, Hayes is thought to have taken part in terrorism, subversive trading, and…

Billy pulls out a bill and hands it to Counter Woman.

BILLY: Just— Keep the change. Thank you.

Billy takes a pair of sunglasses from a rack and puts them on (the tag still attached), then gathers his purchases: the bag with clothes and the yo-yo in it, the Snickers box, and a newspaper.

BILLY: Thank you. Very kind.

Billy leaves quickly.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] Speculation that the Misfits of Science are backed in part by Castro is apparently running rampant in Washington. Fueled by a photograph of Hayes in Ft. Lauderdale last April.

Counter Woman, wearing a crafty look, waits until Billy is fully gone before picking up the phone receiver.

========== 1:01:54 to 1:02:16 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – outside small convenience store:

Billy watches the pickup screeching away (poor Farmer!) as he returns to the others at the Fundae.

BILLY: [to El, subdued:] No shoes, but the rest of the stuff should fit okay.

EL: Great.

Billy hands the bag to El, but Dr. Momquist wants the bag, so El lets him take it. Dr. Momquist gets into the back of the Fundae as Johnny B leads Beef over.

BILLY: They’re calling us a subversive organization, El.

El helps Johnny B and Beef into the Fundae. Billy takes off his newly-bought sunglasses (tag still attached!) to stress his point.

BILLY: I’m serious.

El closes the back door of the Fundae, then turns toward Billy.

BILLY: They’re calling me a subversive. Do you have any idea what this is gonna do to my mother?

========== 1:02:16 to 1:02:52 ==========

interior – beauty salon:

A group of ladies are doing beauty salon stuff and watching a TV that's tuned to the same news broadcast as the TV in the small convenience store. One patron getting her hair done shrieks and faints – that would be Billy’s mother! Beautician doing Mrs. Hayes’ hair leans over her; the other ladies quickly crowd around in concern.

BEAUTICIAN: Oh god! Are you, like, alright?

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] In addition to Dr. William Hayes, other members of the group include:

Exterior (daytime) – tv store window:

Multiple TV’s are tuned to the same news broadcast, which is now showing a photo of Dr. Momquist.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] Dr. Telford Momquist.

A group of people with basketball gear are walking by the store as a photo of El replaces the photo of Dr. Momquist on the TV's.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] Dr. Elvin Lincoln.

Ballplayer (the guy who asked El to play center) stops and points at the TV’s; the others stop and look.

BALLPLAYER: Hey, that’s Stretch. I know that guy.

interior – scanlon's office:

Scanlon’s portable TV is tuned to the same news broadcast: a b&w photo of Gloria and Jane (her arm up to block the camera) replaces the photo of El.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] And a convicted juvenile delinquent who is reported to have been accompanied by her probation officer.

Scanlon is on the phone while watching his TV.

SCANLON: [into phone:] No, sir! [loosens his tie] Believe me, I had no idea!

(For some reason, the broadcast has made no mention of Johnny B!)

interior – humanidyne:

h.i.t. lab:

Miss Nance is in the lab, watching her portable TV – it’s tuned to the same news broadcast.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] If you have any idea of their whereabouts, call the F.B.I. at area code 213-555-2147.

Miss Nance looks at her watch then reaches for the TV.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] We repeat that number: area co—

Miss Nance switches channels, “Days of Our Lives” theme starts up, and she smiles.

MACDONALD CAREY: [from TV:] Like the sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our lives.

========== 1:02:52 to 1:04:54 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert:


(“Days of Our Lives” theme plays out.)

The Fundae is parked (back door up): Beef (with a Snickers) and Jane are sitting in the back, Gloria (playing with the yo-yo) is sitting on the freezer next to them; El (doing crossword in the newspaper and eating a Snickers), Johnny B, and Dr. Momquist are standing outside. Everyone has been brought up to speed about the threat of the Neutron Beam.

JOHNNY B: You realize this is crazy, Hayes. You think we can drive onto guarded property, and break into a bunker that the Army, [ticks off on his fingers] the Navy, and the Air Force haven’t been able to get into.

Billy, who’s standing near El, nods at Johnny B’s words.

BILLY: Exactly. Exactly. Cause if we don’t do it now, with the press out there to see it, I mean, it’s not going to get done.

GLORIA: Yeah. Well, I’ve been listening to the radio, and the Marines don’t even look like they can get in.

Billy turns away to think, doubt creeping in.

DR. MOMQUIST: Of course not. I helped design the bunker. Normal people and machines could never break through. You think Strickland would risk all these tests if he thought they could?

Billy turns back at Dr. Momquist’s words with a “See, I know we have a chance” expression.

DR. MOMQUIST: [encouragingly:] But all of you, with Mr. Biefneiter here...

Billy looks at Jane and Beef.

BILLY: [to Jane:] How’s he holding up?

Jane checks the temperature gauge on Beef’s refrigeration suit.

JANE: Just under twenty.

BEEF: [smiling at Jane] Amelia?

JOHNNY B: [concerned:] But you guys said thirty-two degrees was fatal.

Beef’s eyes widen.

BILLY: Alright, look. I know we’re taking chances here, okay? But, the way I see it, it’s the only way we’re gonna get out of this mess.

EL: [suddenly and adamantly:] Billy’s right. If we can get in there and expose the Neutron Beam to the press... to the world...

El looks over at Billy, who’s pacing, then back at the others with a sigh.

EL: Then we might be doing a big favor for everyone.

BILLY: [in agreement:] Right.

Johnny B and Gloria don’t look too sure - they look wussy in fact!

BILLY: [off their looks:] Huh. Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait. Wait a minute here. Wh— Are you guys kidding? What are these—what are these wussy looks I’m seeing here, huh? You guys got through an army last night. Don’t you realize what you’ve done?

Johnny B looks up from his feet to listen to Billy.

BILLY: No, I guess not. Okay, let me tell you something about last night. Okay? Last night I fel—

Billy breaks off, realizing he really means what he's about to say, and starts over with conviction.

BILLY: Last night I felt better about myself – about what I do – than I have in the past five years of my life. [looks the others in the eyes] I mean that. Now, if you guys wanna go round thinking of yourselves as, like, a bunch of weird losers or something, that’s okay with me.

El looks at the others as he takes in what Billy’s saying.

BILLY: I don’t—I don’t care. That’s fine. But when I see you— When I see you guys, I see something different. I see a team. I see a team that I know can make a difference in the world today.

Johnny B puts his sunglasses on with purpose; Gloria has a determined look; El smiles at Billy – they’ve come around to Billy's point of view.

BILLY: Now are you Misfits ready to kick a little bunny around here, or what?

Everyone exchanges smiles.

EL: I’d follow this man...

El steps over and puts his arm around Billy's shoulders.

EL: the ends of the earth.

BILLY: Thank you.

Gloria smiles at Billy and El.

JOHNNY B: [sardonically:] Or at least till the end of the day.

Gloria smiles at Johnny B; El laughs; Billy looks affronted, but then smiles as he realizes it was mostly a joke.

========== 1:04:54 to 1:05:02 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – outside small convenience store:

2 Highway Patrol cars (sirens wailing) drive up and park out front, where Counter Woman is waiting. She points emphatically in the direction the Misfits went.

========== 1:05:02 to 1:05:21 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert:


Johnny B is walking up a rise in the distance; Gloria watches him, then turns and calls to Jane.


Jane, at the Fundae, turns at Gloria's call.

JANE: Yeah?

Jane walks up to Gloria (past the back of the Fundae, where Beef is lying down). In the distance, El and Dr. Momquist are walking and talking.

GLORIA: Would it be okay if I borrowed your lipstick?

Jane looks past Gloria to Johnny B as if to ask “Because you’re gonna go talk to him?”. Gloria glances toward Johnny B with a smile, then turns back to Jane – answering “Yes” by her smile and a laugh.

JANE: Sure.

Jane gives the lipstick to Gloria.

GLORIA: Thank you.

Gloria goes over to the rear-view mirror of the Fundae to apply the lipstick. Jane watches with a smile and a shake of her head, happy for Gloria, then heads away.

========== 1:05:21 to 1:05:31 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – outside small convenience store:

Counter Woman gestures urgently for the 2 Highway Patrol cars to hurry - they do, driving off in the direction she indicated (sirens again wailing).

========== 1:05:31 to 1:07:24 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert:


Jane walks up to the driver’s side of the Fundae, where Billy is sitting (radio on, waiting for the news of how the Marines have fared at the desert bunker). Billy just glances at Jane, then goes back to fiddling with his newly-bought red cap and thinking. Jane watches him for a minute.

JANE: Psst.

Billy looks up. Jane indicates Gloria then waits for Billy’s reaction. Billy looks over at Gloria, who finishes with the lipstick and hurries off toward the rise. Billy looks back at Jane with a half-hearted smile then goes back to looking at his lap. Jane studies Billy.

JANE: You really meant that, didn’t you?

Billy looks up, unsure what she means, so Jane explains.

JANE: The part about this being the most worthwhile thing.

Billy looks back down, trying to decide how to answer.

BILLY: Jane... [puts the cap on] All my life I’ve been a goof. Ya know?

Jane smiles to indicate she knows.

BILLY: Comin’ up with screwy ideas. Leading people to do [raises his eyebrows in a “You know what I mean?” gesture:] really dumb things.

Jane listens.

BILLY: But I gotta tell ya. Last night I… I did okay.

Jane smiles in agreement.

BILLY: I-I was okay.

Jane waits as Billy realizes how what he’s saying must sound.

BILLY: Am I getting a little mushy here?

Jane looks down and giggles as an answer. Billy looks away and takes off the cap, taking Jane’s reaction badly. Jane makes a guilty face, then puts her arm up on Billy’s knee and changes the subject.

JANE: [sighs] You know, you should have called me, Hayes.

BILLY: I tried to! No, I did— I-I really did. I got your machine, you know? “If your first name starts with B and your last name starts with H, then…”

Jane grimaces guiltily, but without apology.

JANE: I know. “You can take your romantic evenings and—”

BILLY: [waving his hand to indicate he doesn’t need her to finish] I got the message. I got the message.

Billy gives her a wry smile; Jane studies him again.

JANE: Maybe you give up too easily.

BILLY: Naw. I was a jerk, I figured I deserved it.

JANE: [mischievously:] You were a jerk. And you did.

Billy isn't sure how to take Jane's confirmation, but before he can think of a response, an announcer interrupts the music on the radio.

ANNOUNCER: [from radio:] We interrupt the music for a KLCA newsbreak.

Billy grabs the radio from the dashboard and pulls it closer to listen.

ANNOUNCER: [from radio:] The Marines may have succeeded at Iwo Jima, but they have failed to breach the security at the military test site.

Billy and Jane exchange looks.

BILLY: [calls:] Hey, El, we gotta roll!

========== 1:07:24 to 1:07:51 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

news crew area:

Cindy is reporting as continued military activity is going on around her.

CINDY: [to news camera:] The Marines are starting to emerge from the bunker right now, looking tired and beaten. And as you can see behind me...

Cindy glances behind her, where Strickland and General Thiel are shaking hands with Senator Donner.

CINDY: [to news camera:] ...the people from the Pentagon and Humanidyne are just delighted.

interior – scanlon's office:

Scanlon is engrossed in the news broadcast. So are a few others who work at the Correction Facility – they’re watching Scanlon's TV through his inner office window.

CINDY: [from TV:] But, Tom, I suspect the reaction that you’re getting back in New York is something different.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV, solemnly:] Right you are, Cindy. The reaction from around the world is not a good one.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies are engrossed in the news broadcast – Mrs. Hayes is awake (glass of water in hand) and back getting her hair done by Beautician.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV, solemnly:] People are despondently wondering just who will be able to save them from the construction of this new and deadly weapon. Who will be their savior?

========== 1:07:51 to 1:08:00 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert:


BILLY: What’s the temp?

El is helping Beef into the Fundae.

EL: Twenty-four and rising.

BEEF: [calling for Jane:] Amelia?

Jane gives a quick sigh.

JANE: [to Billy:] I’d better ride in the back with Beef.

Jane climbs in the Fundae as Billy turns and calls up the rise.

BILLY: Hey, B-Man! Glo!

========== 1:08:00 to 1:09:38 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert:

up on rise:

Gloria approaches Johnny B.

GLORIA: Johnny B? I think they’re calling us.

Gloria joins Johnny B, who’s standing, arms folded, gazing out over the desert contemplatively.

JOHNNY B: Pretty quiet up here. It’s dry.

Gloria glances around and comments in agreement.

GLORIA: Things don’t grow too well without water.

Johnny B takes off his sunglasses and sighs.

JOHNNY B: I know. That's why I was thinkin’...

Johnny B turns and walks forward slowly. Gloria smiles and follows suit.

JOHNNY B: Maybe I found somethin’ that makes me wanna give up dry land.

GLORIA: I’ll come out and be with you till you make up your mind. [continues in a rush:] I graduate next year, and as long as I check in with Jane every couple-a weeks...

Johnny B slows to a stop.

JOHNNY B: Uh, no, Gloria, that’s not what I mean.

Gloria faces Johnny B, ignoring his protest, and presses her point.

GLORIA: Then I’ll be eighteen! I don’t mind the desert. I think it’s safer for me out here, really!

JOHNNY B: [firmly:] No.

Gloria is taken aback by what Johnny B's firmness implies, and looks at him in hurt confusion.


Johnny B hesitates, unsure how to put it without hurting Gloria’s feelings.

JOHNNY B: Look, you’re a terrific girl. I mean it. But what I didn’t mean for you to think was that—

GLORIA: [interrupts tearfully:] You kissed me last night!

JOHNNY B: Yeah, I kissed Jane, too. I mean, I even kissed Billy. We were happy, we were celebrating. We’re a team. We’re like a family.

GLORIA: [upset:] It’s just like at school isn’t it? They all pretend that they’re my friends, that they like me. [grabs some of her hair briefly] Hey, Glo, like your hair. Love the way you tore up the mall.

JOHNNY B: [insists with honesty:] I do like you. You’re like a sister to me.

GLORIA: [angrily:] I don’t wanna be a sister!

Gloria shakes her head - she should've known it wouldn’t be any different this time.

GLORIA: [accusingly:] You lied to me. You did just what they all do.

JOHNNY B: [bothered that she’s taking it like this:] I didn’t lie!

GLORIA: [upset:] Go ahead, laugh at me now. That’s what they all do.

JOHNNY B: No, Gloria.

GLORIA: [with emotion:] Laugh!

Gloria turns and starts running back down the rise. Johnny B calls after her, not wanting it to end like this.

JOHNNY B: Gloria!

Gloria doesn’t stop. Johnny B calls again.

JOHNNY B: Gloria!

Johnny B suddenly notices the 2 Highway Patrol cars in the distance, heading this way.

JOHNNY B: Aw, no.

========== 1:09:38 to 1:10:47 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert:


Billy and El are arguing with Dr. Momquist - Dr. Momquist wants to be left behind so he can give himself up to the Highway Patrol that's now almost upon them and buy the rest of them some time.

BILLY: [firmly:] No. No way!

EL: Mom, we can’t. Forget it.

DR. MOMQUIST: [insistent:] No, no, I’ll only slow you down. Now here I might be able to do some good. [taking charge:] Go on. You get out of here. Go on.

Dr. Momquist hurries around the side of the Fundae. Gloria comes running down the rise and stops next to Billy and El.

GLORIA: [still teary:] Where’s Jane?

BILLY: She’s in the back, with Beef. [glances up at the rise, confused] Hey, wh-where’s Johnny B?

Gloria gives Billy a fierce glare, then opens the back door of the Fundae and climbs in. El helps Gloria close the door, exchanging a quick look with Billy over this new development. There’s no time for discussion though.

BILLY: [to El, hurriedly:] Alright. Come on, come on, let’s go.

Billy hurries to get in the Fundae; El follows suit, calling to Johnny B, who's arriving.

EL: [impatiently:] Come on, Johnny B, let’s go!

Johnny B drops out of a speedrun and climbs in the Fundae. Billy glances over at him from the driver’s seat.

BILLY: [remarking:] Now’s the time you pick to have girl trouble?

Johnny B gives Billy a look as El climbs in.

JOHNNY B: [not amused:] Hit it, Hayes.

Billy “hits it” and the Fundae heads off.

(“Teamwork” starts up.)


Dr. Momquist turns from watching the Fundae drive off to look toward the 2 Highway Patrol cars, which aren’t very far away now. He hurries forward and stands in the middle of the road to block them. He raises his arms in surrender and calls to them as they come closer.

DR. MOMQUIST: [yells:] Stop! I’m the man you want! I give up!

The 2 Highway Patrol cars keep coming toward Dr. Momquist - he closes his eyes, but stands his ground.

DR. MOMQUIST: [yells:] I’m all yours!

The 2 Highway Patrol cars part and pass on either side of Dr. Momquist – more interested in pursuing the Fundae. After a second, Dr. Momquist notices they didn’t stop. He opens his eyes, then turns slowly to look behind him in confusion.

========== 1:10:47 to 1:12:02 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert:


(“Teamwork” still plays.)

The Fundae is driving down a desert road, the 2 Highway Patrol cars in hot pursuit.


EL: [to Johnny B, with a bit of a scold:] Man, don’t ever tell a woman you want her to be your sister!

Johnny B hangs his head - it's good advice, but he already knows it was dumb of him. Billy checks in the rearview mirror then asks El for an estimation.

BILLY: How far back are they?

El leans out to look.


The 2 Highway Patrol cars are catching up.


EL: They’re gaining on us. Come on, let’s go!

JOHNNY B: Come on, step on it.

BILLY: I am, I am. I’m pushing her as hard as she’ll go. This is it.


The Fundae drives at top speed, bouncing along the dirt road.


El’s head hits the ceiling as the Fundae goes over a bump.

EL: Ow! [to Billy:] Please.

Billy glances at El with a “What am I supposed to do about it?” expression.


More pursuit. More driving. More bouncing.


BILLY: [to no-one in particular:] Does this thing have any shocks?


The Fundae passes a barbed wire fence.


EL: [leaning out to look again] Oh, they’re coming up!


The 2 Highway Patrol cars pass the barbed wire fence.


JOHNNY B: Come on, step on it!


BILLY: I can’t find the turnoff!

JOHNNY B: Then pull through the fence.

The Fundae drives up to a chain-link fence with a sign that says: “PRIVATE PROPERTY. KEEP OUT. HUMANIDYNE TEST RANGE”.


Billy, El, and Johnny B brace themselves for impact.


The Fundae crashes through the fence. A few seconds later, one of the Highway Patrol cars follows it through the hole.

========== 1:12:02 to 1:12:26 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

news crew area:

(“Teamwork” still plays.)

Strickland, General Thiel, and Senator Donner are with Cindy, who’s still reporting.

CINDY: [to Senator Donner:] But the question the whole world is asking, Senator, is: “Do we really need another kind of nuclear weapon?”

GENERAL THIEL: Uh, let me answer that, if I may.

Cindy holds out the microphone to General Thiel.

GENERAL THIEL: [to news camera:] Now this country was founded on its strength, and its ability to keep ahead of the world. Now all I have to say to those people who don’t wish to keep ahead is: “Tough noogie.”

News Crew Guy and a soldier come running up from behind the news camera as General Thiel continues.

GENERAL THIEL: Now as long as we have a safe place to keep this “weapon” and—

General Thiel breaks off as News Crew Guy motions frantically for Cindy to look behind her, which she does (along with Senator Donner). Cindy then looks back at News Crew Guy for an explanation as General Thiel demands the same of the soldier.

GENERAL THIEL: Well, what’s the problem?

The soldier steps up and whispers to General Thiel and Strickland; News Crew Guy steps up and whispers to Cindy and Senator Donner.


========== 1:12:26 to 1:12:54 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – tv store window:

(“Teamwork” still plays.)

Ballplayer and his friends are engrossed in the news broadcast.

CINDY: [from TV:] We have word that it’s the Misfits! Again, that’s the group that broke into Humanidyne last night.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies are still engrossed in the news broadcast.

CINDY: [from TV:] I’m repeating, it appears to be the Misfits of Science. It looks like their ice cream truck.

Mrs. Hayes faints again (dropping her water glass, which smashes on the floor); Beautician and the other ladies react.

interior – scanlon's office:

Scanlon and the people at his window are still engrossed in the news broadcast – Scanlon pulls fretfully on his tie.

CINDY: [from TV:] Apparently— Yes, I can see them now. There are two Highway Patrol cars that are pursuing the truck. And it appears to be heading for the entrance to the bunker.

(“Teamwork” stops.)

interior – humanidyne:

h.i.t. lab:

Miss Nance is still watching “Days of Our Lives” – she now has her glasses off. She bites lovingly into a candy bar.

MACDONALD CAREY: [from TV:] This is Macdonald Carey and these are the days of our lives.

========== 1:12:54 to 1:13:13 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

bunker entrance:

The Fundae parks near the entrance to the desert bunker, the 2 Highway Patrol cars still hot on its tail.

BILLY: Let’s go!

Billy hops out of the Fundae and sees that the Highway Patrol is closing in – they need to do something, and quick!

BILLY: Johnny B.

Johnny B hurries over and Billy points to the 2 Highway Patrol cars. Johnny B quickly fires a bolt toward the 2 cars. The bolt hits in front of the cars and causes them to drive into a muddy ditch – effectively ending their pursuit.

EL: [urgently:] Come on, let’s go!

Billy, El, and Johnny B hurry toward the entrance.

========== 1:13:13 to 1:13:18 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

news crew area:

Over in the news area, everyone has seen what just happened at the bunker entrance.

CINDY: [to news camera, excitedly:] Did you see that? It’s incredible! It looked like a lightning bolt shot right out of his arm!

Senator Donner continues watching the bunker entrance; Cindy turns back to look.

========== 1:13:18 to 1:13:38 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

military area:

Strickland is walking with General Thiel and a soldier.

GENERAL THIEL: [to soldier:] I want that chopper on top of that mesa with a full platoon inside.

The soldier hurries off to comply.

STRICKLAND: Why the helicopter? They’ll never get past the water.

GENERAL THIEL: Well, they might. And then that Neutron Beam is gonna rise up that elevator and pop out of the top like a [???] in broad daylight.

Strickland and General Thiel get into a jeep.

GENERAL THIEL: I paid for that weapon, Strickland. And I’m telling you, it’s gonna be mine.

The jeep starts forward.

========== 1:13:38 to 1:13:47 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

bunker entrance:

Billy, Jane, and Gloria (looking sullen) hurry to the entrance. Gloria goes inside as Billy stops Jane for a second.

BILLY: Jane. How bad is it between them?

Jane just shakes her head wearily before following Gloria inside.

BILLY: That bad, huh?

Billy follows.

========== 1:13:47 to 1:13:54 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

military area:

The chopper takes off, per General Thiel’s orders.

========== 1:13:54 to 1:14:08 ==========

interior – desert bunker:


The Misfits, Jane, and Beef are running down a corridor. Billy, El, and Johnny B round a corner and turn back to wait for the other three.

EL: [urgently:] Come on, let’s go! Hurry!

JANE: He’s slowing down.

Jane reaches back for Gloria (who’s still looking sullen).

JANE: Gloria, come here.

BILLY: We’re all slowin’ down. What’s his temp?

Jane checks the temperature gauge on Beef's suit.

JANE: Uh. Twenty-five degrees and climbing.

Jane grabs Gloria’s arm and pulls her along.

========== 1:14:08 to 1:14:15 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

military area:

The chopper, the jeep with Strickland and General Thiel, and a tank full of soldiers head for the bunker.

========== 1:14:15 to 1:14:27 ==========

interior – desert bunker:


The Misfits, Jane, and Beef hurry down a corridor.

JANE: [to Billy:] If the water barrier’s as big as Dr. Mom said it was...

BILLY: Dr. Mom has been known to exaggerate, okay?

water barrier room:

The Misfits, Jane, and Beef arrive, running, in a room as large as an airplane hanger. They slow to a stop and stare across the room at the giant metal door that covers the infamous water barrier.

EL: Offhand, I’d say that’s not an exaggeration.

========== 1:14:27 to 1:14:35 ==========

interior – desert bunker:


Strickland, General Thiel and some soldiers are running down a corridor.

GENERAL THIEL: Alright, men! Let’s go!

They round a corner and hurry on.

========== 1:14:35 to 1:15:41 ==========

interior – desert bunker:

water barrier room:

Billy starts backing toward the water barrier door while looking at the others – he’s trying to be optimistic.

BILLY: Now, alright. So, it’s a big door. We all see that. I think we accept that. The door is… is really big.

The others listen as they start walking forward.

BILLY: But how do we know what’s really behind the door?

Jane nods at this, but nobody else seems to be buying it.

BILLY: And I think—I think that’s the question. You know, I mean, this water obstacle thing – it could be nothing. I mean, it could be like a little pond. A hot tub or something, you know?

The others continue to look unconvinced, so Billy gets more insistent.

BILLY: What’s the point of injecting something negative into this thing if we don’t really have to. And Dr. Mom said— And Dr. Mom, I mean, he designed this thing, you know?

Behind Billy, the water barrier door starts to open (activated by a pressure plate?). The others stop and stare as Billy finishes his pep talk without turning around.

BILLY: And if Dr. Mom says that Beef can handle it, then I’m sure it’s okay.

The door opens fully and the water barrier is revealed in all its glory. The others stare at it in shock.

BILLY: [off their looks:] Hey, come on. What’s the matter?

Nobody answers Billy, so he turns around to look and is equally struck by the massive size of the water barrier.

BILLY: On the other hand, Dr. Mom could be a bald-faced liar.

Billy continues to stare as Johnny B speaks the question on everyone’s mind.

JOHNNY B: So what do we do now, Hayes? Beef can’t handle that!

Across the room, Strickland, General Thiel, and the soldiers arrive - there's no time for Billy to answer the question (though the only answer would be 'Nothing', since getting past the water barrier was the only way to get to the Beam).

EL: [to the others, urgently:] Hey, let’s get outta here.

El and the others spring into action, running for a low wall in front of the water barrier door. Strickland, General Thiel, and the soldiers - who start firing - give chase.

GENERAL THIEL: [to soldiers:] Spread out! Spread out!

The Misfits, Jane, and Beef reach the low wall: El, Gloria, and Jane jump for cover behind it as Billy helps Beef climb over; Johnny B jumps on top of the wall and fires a bolt at the soldiers. The bolt hits between the soldiers, knocking them down and stopping their attack. Billy and Johnny B drop behind the wall, where Billy belatedly answers Johnny B's question.

BILLY: What do we do, B-Man? We die.

This is a dire assessment and they both know it.

========== 1:15:41 to 1:16:17 ==========

TV is showing a picture of drawn representations of the Misfits and Jane around the Fundae as Newscaster reports.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] A few hours ago, they were traitors. Now, they are the hope of the world.

The picture shrinks into the corner of the TV as Newscaster continues.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] The Misfits of Science – whether they be subversives, or merely disgruntled employees – are apparently...

interior – scanlon's office:

Scanlon and the people at his window (which are a whole group now) are watching the news broadcast in earnest now – having dropped what they were doing – and are invested in the outcome.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] ...all that stands between mankind and the construction of the Neutron Beam.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies are watching the news broadcast in earnest now – having dropped what they were doing – and are invested in the outcome.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] The Pope has blessed them, the people have cheered.

TV shows live footage of crowds around the world in the corner as Newscaster continues.

NEWSCASTER (TOM): [from TV:] And now – as you’re seeing in these live pictures – all the world can do is wait. Cindy?

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

news crew area:

The news camera turns from the chopper, now atop the mesa, to Cindy as she reports.

CINDY: [to news camera:] And wait is all we can do, Tom. It’s been some sixty-six minutes since the Misfits and the army entered the mesa. And we’ve had word that there’s some kind of a Mexican stand-off going on in there.

Cindy turns to look up at the top of the mesa.

========== 1:16:17 to 1:20:08 ==========

interior – water barrier room:

across the room:

Strickland, General Thiel and the soldiers have retreated far back from the low wall in front of the water barrier door, driven there by Johnny B’s occasional bolts - Strickland has a megaphone and is trying to appeal to Billy and El.

STRICKLAND: [into megaphone:] Hayes. Lincoln. Standing around down here for another hour isn’t going to do anyone any good.

Nobody appears at the low wall, so General Thiel takes the megaphone.

GENERAL THIEL: [into megaphone:] [laughs] Ya know, I don’t think any of you really wanna face that washing machine behind you. And even if you do get through there to the button...

behind low wall:

The Misfits and Jane are lying on their backs in a row and Beef is sitting in a corner. El looks over at Billy as General Thiel gloatingly states exactly why he has the upper hand – Billy fidgets as he listens.

GENERAL THIEL: [from megaphone:] ...I’ve got a chopper standing by at the top of this mesa to scoop up that Beam before anyone can see it.

across the room:

Strickland waits as General Thiel concludes his reasoning.

GENERAL THIEL: [into megaphone:] So why don’t you save yourselves some pain – and the heartache – by givin’ yourselves up, huh? Who knows? [laughs] We might even be able to work out something where you can work off your time in the army.

Strickland gives General Thiel a look.

behind low wall:

The Misfits and Jane exchange glances.

EL: It doesn’t look like we have much of a choice.

BILLY: [he knows] Yeah.

Billy stands up and the soldiers fire at him.

BILLY: [yells:] Suck eggs, General!

Billy quickly returns to lying down; the soldiers fire a last couple of shots.

EL: [to himself, with a sigh:] That was not my choice.

across the room:

The soldiers are ordered forward.

GENERAL THIEL: [into megaphone:] We’re comin’ in, Hayes!

behind low wall:

BILLY: [to Johnny B:] Go.

Johnny B scrambles onto the top of the low wall as the soldiers run forward and fire at him. He fires a bolt - which hits in front of the soldiers and knocks them back - then quickly returns to lying down. Gloria looks at him.

JOHNNY B: [breathing hard:] That’s it, Hayes.

Billy reacts – now what’ll they do?

JOHNNY B: Four in the last thirty minutes. I’m tapped.

BILLY: [to Jane:] What’s he reading now?

JANE: [leans up to look] Twenty-seven degrees.

Billy looks at the water barrier as if trying to decide something. El notices and shakes his head, reading Billy’s mind.

EL: [warningly:] Don’t even think about it, Billy.

Beef looks over at the water barrier as El continues.

EL: If Beef tries to freeze all that water, he’s a dead man.

BILLY: [sighs] Yeah, I know he can’t.

GENERAL THIEL: [from megaphone:] I don’t think you or any of your freaks have anything left, Dr. Hayes.

across the room:

GENERAL THIEL: [into megaphone:] So I’m gonna give ya thirty seconds before I send these men in again.

behind low wall:

GLORIA: [upset:] Freaks. Guess maybe he’s right, huh?

Johnny B feels bad to hear Gloria talk like this.

JOHNNY B: No, Gloria.

GLORIA: Oh, come on.

Beef looks over at the water barrier, then back at Gloria as she continues miserably.

GLORIA: We’re all rejects. It’s this family thing: “One for all and all for one”.

Beef starts taking off one of his insulated gloves, unbeknownst to the others.

GLORIA: I mean, who were we trying to kid?

BILLY: We weren’t trying to kid anyone. We—

GLORIA: [emotion creeping into her voice:] You guys were just out to get your jobs back. Jane wanted to see you and keep me out of jail. And Johnny B, “Mr. Rock and Roll”, you were just out to prove [tearfully:] how cool you are.

JOHNNY B: [wishing he had the time to explain:] You’re wrong, Gloria.

GLORIA: [tearfully:] Well I think I’m right! And I think that right now I’d just as soon be in jail.

Jane closes her eyes – it hurts to hear Gloria say that.

across the room:

General Thiel looks at his watch and so does Strickland.

behind low wall:

Billy is looking discouraged.

BILLY: [sadly:] Yeah. Yeah.

EL: [protesting:] Billy.

BILLY: Naw, she’s right, El.

El reacts, also becoming discouraged.

BILLY: I mean, maybe we did get carried away here trying to fit the Misfits together. Misfits don’t fit.

El sighs, not wanting it to be true.

EL: [protesting:] No.

Beef gets his glove off and flexes his icy hand. He looks over at the Misfits.

BILLY: Naw, it was stupid. [sighs] It was just another dumb scheme that lands us all in jail. I mean, I did it again, didn’t I?

EL: No, Billy. Come on!

BILLY: [mostly to himself:] Just the world’s worst leader.

Beef starts getting up.

GENERAL THIEL: [from megaphone:] That’s it, Hayes! Time’s up!

BILLY: [to others:] I’m sorry, guys. [calls:] Alright, Strickland, we’re comin’ out!

Beef stands and turns toward the water barrier as the Misfits and Jane start standing up with their arms raised.

across the room:

Strickland and General Thiel watch the Misfits and Jane stand up in surrender.

behind low wall:

Beef reaches for the water barrier with his ungloved hand. Jane turns around and realizes what Beef intends to do.

JANE: [alarmed:] Beef!

El turns as Jane reaches to stop Beef.


Heedless of the danger to him, Beef plunges his hand all the way into the water barrier. Billy, El, and Jane react.

across the room:

Strickland and General Thiel react - the water barrier has frozen solid into a tunnel of ice!

GENERAL THIEL: [impressed:] Son of a—

behind low wall:

JOHNNY B: [amazed:] Man, don’t ever take this dude to the beach.

Beef slumps to the ground – freezing the water barrier took a lot out of him - and Jane drops down with him to kneel beside him. Billy looks at the others - now that Beef has beaten the water barrier obstacle, there's a chance they can finish their mission.

BILLY: You guys wanna give it a try?

JOHNNY B: [nods] Let’s bolt.

El hurries to help Jane with Beef.

EL: [to Jane:] Quick, get his glove back on.

BILLY: What’s his temperature?

JANE: 30 degrees.

EL: I think he’ll make it. Come on, Beef, let’s get you up.

El and Jane help Beef to his feet and they, Billy, Johnny B, and Gloria all start toward the frozen tunnel.

across the room:

GENERAL THIEL: [ordering soldiers:] After ‘em! [to the soldier in command:] We’re going to the rooftop. Don’t let any of ‘em out of here alive.

Soldier nods and moves to follow orders as General Thiel turns to Strickland.


Strickland and General Thiel head for the rooftop.


The Misfits, Jane, and Beef head into the tunnel.

behind low wall:

Soldiers run forward and leap over the low wall.


The Misfits, Jane, and Beef head further into the tunnel. Soldiers enter the tunnel and follow in pursuit.

========== 1:20:08 to 1:20:17 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

news crew area:

Cindy turns from looking up at the mesa.

CINDY: [to news camera:] There’s something happening up there. I’m not quite sure what it is. About to get word.

News Crew Guy runs up and whispers something to Cindy.

Exterior (daytime) – tv store window:

CINDY: [from TV:] Yes, the Misfits are on the move!

Ballplayer and his friends react with excitement.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies clap and cheer - Beautician hugs Mrs. Hayes.

========== 1:20:17 to 1:22:56 ==========

interior – desert bunker:

Beam storage area:

Deeper into the bunker now, the Misfits, Jane, and Beef arrive, running, in the Beam storage area. They stop and stare across at the Neutron Beam, which is in an elevator that will send it to the roof.

EL: [solemnly:] There it is.

The soldiers aren’t far behind – they start firing.

BILLY: Let’s get out of here. Come on!

Billy and the others run forward and reach some large pipes as the soldiers give chase, continuing to fire.

BILLY: [to Jane:] Over there, take him over there!

Jane and Beef hide behind one pipe, Billy behind another, and El and Gloria behind another. Johnny B faces the soldiers and raises his arms as if he's about to fire a bolt - the soldiers stop in their tracks, ceasing fire and ducking for cover. Johnny B drops his arms and hides behind the pipe Billy is behind. Billy looks at him with surprise.

BILLY: You have enough for another bolt?

JOHNNY B: I’m tapped. Think I fooled them?

Billy doesn’t answer, he thinks instead.

BILLY: How ‘bout a run?

JOHNNY B: I’m pretty weak, but I’ll give it a try.

EL: [calls:] Johnny!

Billy and Johnny B look over and El indicates the elevator.

EL: The green button sends it to the roof.

JOHNNY B: ‘Kay, got it.

BILLY: [to Johnny B:] Come on, go ahead.

Johnny B looks over at Gloria as Billy gets behind him to give him room. Gloria is looking at Johnny B, upset and angry that he’s gonna take such a risk. She turns away as he moves to the edge of the pipe. Johnny B looks around the pipe as he prepares for what he's about to do: the soldiers are crouched and waiting.

JOHNNY B: [singing quietly:] Maybe some day your name will be in lights, saying: “Johnny B. Goode gonna play tonight”.

Johnny B launches into a speedrun – as soon as he’s in the open, the soldiers fire at him. Gloria watches anxiously, so does Billy. Unfortunately, with such a low charge, his speedrun only gets him halfway to the elevator. But he doesn't stop running, even as the soldiers advance, still firing. A bullet hits Johnny B on his arm, creating a spark, and he tumbles to the ground. Billy hits the pipe in frustration and worry. Johnny B looks to Gloria as the soldiers continue to fire at him.

JOHNNY B: Gloria!

Gloria’s emotions are in a turmoil as the soldiers advance further, but in the end, seeing Johnny B in danger outweighs her hurt feelings from earlier.

GLORIA: Johnny B!

Gloria runs forward into the line of fire; El tries to stop her. Jane reacts with alarm.

JANE: Gloria!

Gloria stops beside Johnny B and turns to face the soldiers. She unleashes her TK on the soldiers, forcefully throwing the first wave back. She keeps up the barrage until none of the soldiers are left standing; the second wave of soldiers turns tail and runs. Gloria smiles with triumphant relief (here's some of that confidence and self-esteem Billy told Jane that Gloria would find if she used her powers constructively), then turns her attention to Johnny B. She quickly removes her sleeveless Misfits of Science jacket and kneels by him, pressing it to his wound.

GLORIA: [worriedly:] You okay?

Johnny B takes a second to answer, glancing between Gloria and where the soldiers were – her display of power has taken him slightly aback.

JOHNNY B: Let’s just say that I’m glad that you’re my friend.

Gloria smiles happily, letting him know she's okay with that, and she's forgiven him.

GLORIA: One of the family.

Johnny B smiles at her wording, and they share the moment - everything is fine between them now. The others rush forward and Billy crouches by Johnny B.

BILLY: [with concern:] You okay, B-Man?

JOHNNY B: Oh yeah, I’ll make it.

BILLY: Alright. Come on, let me help you up there.

Billy and Gloria help Johnny B to stand. Gloria keeps her jacket held to Johnny B’s arm as they all look at the Neutron Beam, only a few feet away.

BILLY: Why don’t you do the honors, El.

El walks slowly toward the elevator.

BILLY: Send it to the roof, so the world can see it.

========== 1:22:56 to 1:23:06 ==========

interior – desert bunker:


Strickland and General Thiel walk purposefully to an elevator. Strickland presses the green ascend button and they get inside. He looks at General Thiel, a little unsure of the General's military over-exuberance.

(“Johnny Comes Marching Home” starts up.)

========== 1:23:06 to 1:23:18 ==========

interior – desert bunker:

Beam storage area:

El pushes the green button and he and the others watch as the elevator heads for the rooftop.

(“Johnny Comes Marching Home” plays out.)

El rejoins the others with a grin and everyone smiles, happy that their mission was a success.

========== 1:23:18 to 1:23:33 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

news crew area:

Cindy reports the news she's just gotten.

CINDY: [to news camera, excitedly:] The Misfits have done it!

Exterior (daytime) – tv store window:

CINDY: [from TV, excitedly:] They’ve broken through!

TV shows live footage of crowds cheering in major cities. Ballplayer and the guy next to him exchange low-fives.

interior – beauty salon:

The other ladies cheer and congratulate Mrs. Hayes - Beautician hugs Mrs. Hayes, who frowns at the forwardness.

interior – humanidyne:

h.i.t. lab:

Miss Nance is still riveted to “Days of Our Lives” and eating her candy bar.

========== 1:23:33 to 1:23:39 ==========

interior – desert bunker:

Beam storage area:

The Misfits, Jane, and Beef have been celebrating. El puts Jane down from hugging her, he's just realized something.

EL: What’re we doing? We gotta get upstairs.

BILLY: You’re right. Come on everybody, let’s go.

EL: Come on, let’s go.

El and the others hurry back the way they came.

("The Second Time" starts up.)

========== 1:23:39 to 1:24:09 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

top of mesa:

("The Second Time" still plays.)

Strickland and General Thiel exit the elevator and look down the mesa.

news crew area:

Cindy is interviewing Senator Donner about the fact that the bunker can be breached.

SENATOR DONNER: Well, of course, construction of the Neutron Beam will now be postponed indefinitely.

CINDY: [to news camera:] I expect that’ll make a lot of people very happy.

Cindy turns back to Senator Donner, who nods. Something attracts Cindy’s attention and she points up at top of the mesa.

CINDY: Excuse me, Senator, but there seems to be some activity on top of the mesa right now.

Senator Donner turns to look up at top of the mesa, along with the news camera.

SENATOR DONNER: Oh, yes, yes, I can see that. Well, I’m not sure what that is, but that does look like Dr. Strickland, and, yes, General Thiel.

========== 1:24:09 to 1:24:19 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

top of mesa:

("The Second Time" still plays.)

Strickland and General Thiel lead 2 chopper pilots to the elevator where the Neutron Beam will arrive.

GENERAL THIEL: As soon as it comes up, load it in.

========== 1:24:19 to 1:24:33 ==========

interior – water barrier room:


(“The Second Time” still plays.)

The Misfits, Jane, and Beef are heading back through the frozen tunnel: El in the lead, then Billy, then Johnny B with Gloria, then Jane with Beef, lagging behind. Billy stops and waits for Johnny B and Gloria.

BILLY: Alright. Come on, come on.

Billy pushes them on past him and looks back at Jane and Beef.

BILLY: Jane.

JANE: I’ll walk Beef up, you guys go on.

BILLY: You sure?

JANE: We’ll be fine, Hayes, really. [gestures for him to hurry] Go, go on.

Billy joins the other 3 Misfits, who have stopped to wait for him, and the four of them continue on.

========== 1:24:33 to 1:25:03 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

top of mesa:

(“The Second Time” still plays.)

The elevator doors open – the Neutron Beam has arrived. Strickland and General Thiel look at it – General Thiel with pleasure (he likes his new toy!).

news crew area:

CINDY: [pointing:] It looks like there’s something coming out of the top of the mesa right now, Senator.

top of mesa:

The 2 chopper pilots pick up the Beam and start toward the chopper.

news crew area:

Senator Donner spots the Beam.

SENATOR DONNER: [stunned:] My god… They built it.

CINDY: Built what, Senator?

SENATOR: The Beam. [angrily:] They’ve already built the Beam.

========== 1:25:03 to 1:25:14 ==========

interior – desert bunker:


(“The Second Time” still plays.)

The Misfits are running down a corridor.

GLORIA: How do we get up there?

BILLY: There’s an elevator around the corner there.

They reach said elevator (the one Strickland and General Thiel just used) and Billy pushes green ascend button before getting inside.

BILLY: [to others:] Come on, come on.

The others hurry inside (Gloria checking on Johnny B's arm to be sure he's still okay).

BILLY: [to elevator, impatiently:] Come on!

========== 1:25:14 to 1:25:28 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

top of mesa:

(“The Second Time” still plays.)

Strickland and General Thiel help the 2 chopper pilots load the Beam into the chopper. Strickland gives General Thiel a look before getting into the chopper. One of the chopper pilots hands a helmet to General Thiel.

GENERAL THIEL: [scornfully:] You gotta be kidding.

General Thiel throws the helmet onto the ground in disgust and gets into the chopper.

========== 1:25:28 to 1:31:28 ==========

Exterior (daytime) – desert bunker site:

military area:

("The Second Time" still plays.)

Senator Donner hurries past a group of soldiers.

SENATOR DONNER: [calls:] Gunnery officer.

Senator Donner stops by a tank, where Army Officer is looking through binoculars at the top of the mesa.

SENATOR DONNER: Are you a gunnery officer?

ARMY OFFICER: [lowers binoculars] Yes, sir.

SENATOR DONNER: You got a radio there?


SENATOR DONNER: Okay. That chopper up there, that is not to leave that mesa.

Army Officer nods. The chopper lifts off from the top of the mesa.

SENATOR DONNER: Shoot it down.

Army Officer looks at Senator Donner in disbelief.

ARMY OFFICER: [laughs uncertainly] Sir, that’s one of ours.

SENATOR DONNER: [angrily:] I’m a U.S. Senator, dammit! I said shoot it down!


Army Officer gives Senator Donner a sideways glance, then raises his radio.

ARMY OFFICER: [into radio, quietly:] Uh, Firebase Delta, Firebase Delta. This is Red Dog. [glances at Senator Donner again] Listen, you fellas have a little safer angle on this thing. Why’n’t you lay a couple of warning shots across that chopper’s bow.

Senator Donner waits, intently watching the chopper. Firebase Delta (which is two soldiers at a defense post on a hill nearby) fires a warning shot - it grazes the chopper’s tailfin.


The chopper is rocked by the shot.

GENERAL THIEL: [angrily:] Who do they think they’re shooting at? [to Chopper Pilot:] Turn around and give me a shot at that mesa.

General Thiel leaves his seat and gets behind the Beam's controls.

GENERAL THIEL: Stupid gooses. I’ll show ‘em what a real weapon can do.

Strickland gets up in alarm - firing at someone other than the enemy was never in the plan.


General Thiel swings the Beam to aim at Firebase Delta.


Strickland struggles with General Thiel, trying to stop him from firing.

GENERAL THIEL: [angrily:] Strickland, get out of my way!

General Thiel pushes Strickland off roughly - Strickland hits his head and falls back to his seat, unconscious. General Thiel re-aims the Beam.

news crew area:

Cindy and the news crew watch and wait.

military area:

Senator Donner and Army Officer watch and wait.

top of mesa:

The elevator arrives, the doors open, and the Misfits step out. They look down the mesa, then over at the chopper.


General Thiel fires the Neutron Beam Cannon.

(“The Second Time” fades out momentarily.)

top of mesa:

The Misfits watch as the Cannon emits a large green beam that slices through the air and hits the hill on which Firebase Delta stands. The ensuing blast sends out both a shockwave - which knocks back 2 soldiers standing at the bottom of the hill - and a brilliant light that forces the Misfits to cover their eyes.

news crew area:

Cindy, the news crew, and some soldiers react.

interior – scanlon's office:

Scanlon and the people at his window stare at the TV in astonishment, the Beam’s green light flashing on their faces.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies stare at the TV in astonishment, the Beam’s green light flashing on their faces.

military area:

Senator Donner and Army Officer (who drops his radio) stare in astonishment.

SENATOR DONNER: [mouthing:] Oh my…

The light fades and it's revealed that Firebase Delta, and the entire hill it sat upon, are now completely gone! The 2 soldiers run away from the blast-site in fear.

top of mesa:

El and Johnny B stare in shock.

EL: [horrified:] My god.

news crew area:

Cindy, the news crew, and the soldiers stare in shock.

military area:

Senator Donner and Army Officer step back in shock.

ARMY OFFICER: Where’d—where’d they go?

top of mesa:

Billy and Gloria stare in shock. Billy turns to look at the chopper, then rallies his troops.

BILLY: Let’s go.

(“The Second Time” restarts.)

Billy leads the others to the edge of the mesa. They stand, facing the chopper, and Billy turns to Johnny B.

BILLY: Johnny B, you got a charge?

JOHNNY B: Naw, I’m pretty tapped.

Billy tries his other superpowered team member.


GLORIA: [objecting:] I can’t bring that down!

El tries to help - there's too much at stake, they can't give up now.

EL: [to Johnny B and Gloria:] Look, you both gotta work together.

El looks over at the chopper, which hovers forebodingly.

news crew area:

Cindy turns from staring at the absence of Firebase Delta, and notices who's on top of the mesa.

CINDY: Look! [points:] Up on the mesa!

The news camera turns to where Cindy is pointing.

CINDY: It’s the Misfits!

Exterior (daytime) – tv store window:

Ballplayer and his friends are glued to the news broadcast.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies are glued to the news broadcast.

interior – scanlon's office:

Scanlon and the people at his window are glued to the news broadcast – Scanlon twists a pencil tensely.

CINDY: [from TV:] Yes, it’s all of the Misfits. They’re all there together.


GENERAL THIEL: [to Chopper Pilot:] Swing around! Give me a shot at the top of the mesa!

top of mesa:

The chopper starts swinging around as ordered.

BILLY: B-Man, you ready?

Johnny B, his arms raised to fire (his wounded arm is doing fine now and no longer needs the jacket pressed to it), answers in the affirmative.

JOHNNY B: Ready.


GLORIA: I’ll try.

EL: Come on, let’s go. One, two, three. Hit it!

Gloria uses her TK to hold the chopper steady so Johnny B's bolt will count; Johnny B fires and the bolt hits the chopper’s tailfin.


General Thiel tries to keep the Beam aimed at the Misfits as the chopper is rocked by the shot.

top of mesa:

The chopper struggles to remain airborne. Gloria releases her telekinetic hold on the chopper as it slowly sinks down past the edge of the mesa, out of sight. The Misfits all smile, excited that it worked.

BILLY: [happily:] You got ‘em. Alright!

news crew area:

Senator Donner has rejoined Cindy – he, Cindy, the news crew, and the soldiers all cheer.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies cheer.

Exterior (daytime) – tv store window:

Ballplayer and his friends cheer.

top of mesa:

EL: [grinning:] Alright.

Billy, Johnny B, and Gloria grin with him. Suddenly, the chopper comes rising up above the mesa again – it’s not defeated! The Misfits stare at the hovering chopper in disbelief.

Exterior (daytime) – tv store window:

Ballplayer and his friends stare in disbelief.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies stare in disbelief.

interior – scanlon's office:

Scanlon and the people at his window stare in disbelief – Scanlon again twisting his pencil tensely.

news crew area:

The soldiers stare in disbelief. Cindy stares up at the top of the mesa.


GENERAL THIEL: [to Chopper Pilot:] Gimme that shot! Gimme that shot!

top of mesa:

The chopper comes closer and swings around.

BILLY: It’s up to you, Glo. Come on.

Gloria uses her TK to hold the chopper again, concentrating hard.

news crew area:

The news crew watches.

Exterior (daytime) – tv store window:

Ballplayer and his friends watch.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies watch.

interior – scanlon's office:

Scanlon and the people at his window watch.


GENERAL THIEL: [to Chopper Pilot:] Gimme that shot!

CHOPPER PILOT: I’m trying, sir.

news crew area:

Senator Donner, Cindy, the news crew, and the soldiers watch.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies watch.

Exterior (daytime) – tv store window:

Ballplayer and his friends watch.

interior – scanlon's office:

Scanlon and the people at his window watch – Scanlon reaches for another pencil (having cracked his previous one?).

top of mesa:

Gloria is still using her TK to hold the chopper, but to no avail.

BILLY: Now, hold ‘em, Glo. Come on, you gotta hold ‘em!

Gloria releases her telekinetic hold on the chopper and turns to Billy.

GLORIA: I can’t do it!

Billy looks at her.

GLORIA: [insists:] I can’t.


GENERAL THIEL: [to Chopper Pilot:] Bring it around.

top of mesa:

Billy looks from the chopper to Johnny B.

BILLY: Johnny B.

JOHNNY B: [reminding:] Naw, I’m tapped.

Billy turns back to Gloria.

BILLY: Keep ‘em from swinging around.

GLORIA: I’ll try.

Gloria uses her telekinetic hold on the chopper again while Billy thinks - they need something to bring the chopper down. El notices the helmet General Thiel discarded earlier.

EL: Billy, the helmet!

Billy turns to look – the helmet might just do it!

BILLY: [to El:] Get it!

El hurries to do so.

BILLY: [to El, urgently:] Pass it! Pass it to me!

El picks up the helmet; Billy glances at Gloria, who's looked away from the chopper to see what's going on.

BILLY: Hold ‘em, Glo. Don’t stop!

Gloria turns back to the chopper and strengthens her telekinetic hold on it.

BILLY: [to El, urgently:] Come on, toss it!

El just holds the helmet, hesitating, thinking of how terrible he is at passing to Billy when it's a basketball.

BILLY: [to El, urgently:] Don’t hold out on me now, big guy. Come on!

El goes for it, giving a hundred percent, and makes a perfect pass to Billy, who catches the helmet and gives El a quick “Good job” smile.

Exterior (daytime) – tv store window:

Ballplayer and his friends watch.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies watch.

interior – scanlon's office:

Scanlon and the people at his window watch – Scanlon is twisting his tie now (perhaps he ran out of pencils?).

top of mesa:

Billy throws the helmet toward the chopper while Gloria maintains her telekinetic hold.


Chopper Pilot struggles against Gloria’s TK; General Thiel reaches for the Beam's firing button. The helmet hits the rotors of the chopper and the chopper is thrown off balance. General Thiel is knocked sideways just as he’s pushing the firing button - the Beam is turned and points inside the chopper instead. The Beam fires and the chopper is engulfed in a dazzling flash!

(“The Second Time” ends.)

top of mesa:

The Misfits are pushed back by the Beam's shockwave.

news crew area:

Senator Donner, Cindy, the news crew, and the soldiers all stare up at the place where the chopper just was as light from the blast fades away.

top of mesa:

The Misfits stare at the place where the chopper just was - there's nothing left of it, its occupants, or the Neutron Beam Cannon itself.

news crew area:

Senator Donner, Cindy, the news crew, and the soldiers realize this means the danger is over and react excitedly. Senator Donner and Cindy hug.

Exterior (daytime) – tv store window:

TV shows live footage of crowds cheering around the world. Ballplayer and his friends cheer and high-five each other.

interior – beauty salon:

Mrs. Hayes and the other ladies cheer and clap. (Perhaps Mrs. Hayes will forgive Billy for not being a yuppie now that he’s a hero and all.)

interior – scanlon's office:

Scanlon pounds on his desk excitedly and the people at his window cheer and clap. Scanlon notices the others standing at his window and turns to glare at them – they quickly disperse back to work.

top of mesa:

Jane and Beef have just arrived in the elevator - they exit and look over at the Misfits, who are celebrating. El laughs and runs over to them. He lifts Jane into a quick hug; she claps him on the back excitedly as he sets her down.

EL: [happily:] We did it! We did it!

El turns to Beef to include him in the celebration - after all, they never could have succeeded without his help.

EL: Hey, Beef, I’m gonna buy you a snow cone.

Billy comes over and stands beside Jane. They look down the mesa, then at each other. Jane crosses her arms and gives Billy a raised eyebrow look, then shakes her head - everything they've done has made her rethink how she feels about him.

JANE: [mock chiding:] You know, you really shoulda called me, Hayes.

Billy smiles at this, but now that she's thinking of him differently, there’s a favor he'd like to ask.

BILLY: Hey, will ya... Will ya call me Billy?

JANE: [smiles and nods] Yeah. (She does remember to - until she’s annoyed with him, then it's back to 'Hayes'!)

Jane steps forward and Billy puts his hand under her chin, guiding her face up to his. They kiss and hug. Jane gives Billy an extra little peck on the cheek; Billy smiles happily and twirls Jane around in another hug.

news crew area:

Everyone present celebrates and cheers.

top of mesa:

Billy sets Jane down from their hug as Johnny B and Gloria hug. El gives Beef a high-five, then gives one to Billy. Johnny B and Beef do a high-five; Gloria jumps for joy. The team of heroes raise their arms in triumph, in response to the cheering and ovation at the bottom of the mesa.

news crew area:

Senator Donner and Cindy hug again. The soldiers clap – acknowledging the success 'Team Misfits' had at what they themselves hadn’t been able to do.

top of mesa:

Billy raises his arm in triumph again as the others go back to celebrating. Jane and Beef hug; Johnny B and Gloria hug again; Billy and El clasp arms briefly then do a leaping high-five.

(Screen freezes with credits.)

========== 1:31:28 to 1:31:45 ==========

interior – humanidyne:

h.i.t. lab:

Miss Nance shuts off her TV and gets ready to go home. She puts her glasses back on and walks to the door, where she turns out the lights.

MISS NANCE: Goodnight bunnies.

========== 1:31:45 to 1:33:29 ==========

(“Feels Like Science” plays and the rest of the credits roll, interspersed with shots of magazine covers)

The Misfits, Jane, and Beef are a new media sensation – they’ve gotten cover stories in various major magazines (a proud Dr. Momquist is with them in one). Johnny B has returned to the rock scene (a hero, like Billy said); H.I.T. has been reinstated (Billy and El got their jobs back!); Gloria is on probation (under Jane’s supervision); Beef remains free from military imprisonment.

=============== END ===============

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