Transcript 6

Transcript – 06

========== 00:00 to 01:30 ==========

exterior (daytime) – museum grounds:

At the Los Angeles Maritime Museum, preparations are going on for the upcoming brigantine Antoinette exhibit. A banner is being put up on the museum: “Antoinette’s sunken treasure. Here ‘live’ in L.A. Presented by the Humanidyne Corp.” Beside a sewer grate out front of the museum is a ‘Men Working’ sign.

[prelap:] DWP 1: Is that why they need more juice? The treasure?

[prelap:] DWP 2: Yeah, they got some kinda laser security system to guard it. Newspaper said it’s worth over thirty million.

DWP 1 whistles.

[prelap:] DWP 2: Huh, I’d guard it, too.

interior – sewer tunnels:

Climbing into the sewers below the museum are 2 Department of Water and Power employees.

DWP 1: I hate it down here. Whosever idea it was to put cable underground oughta–

He stops as a noise issues forth. They both look around.

DWP 1: What’s going on down here?

DWP 2: Looks like one of the other teams already got this.

DWP 1: Nah, the guy in the museum said we were it.

DWP 2: Yeah?

They head off down a tunnel.

DWP 2: Wait a minute.

They both stop and DWP 2 turns and calls down the tunnel going the opposite way.

DWP 2: [calls:] Hello!

They wait, but nobody – or nothing – answers.

DWP 2: [taps DWP 1] C’mon.

DWP 1: Yeah.

They continue on their way. The tunnels further in are darker.

DWP 2: Looks like somebody’s forgettin’ to change the bulbs. [in a funny voice:] C’mon, darling.

DWP 1: You know, there are stories. I heard a couple-a guys last month, said they saw–

DWP 2: What, you believe that monster stuff?

DWP 1: Hey, I’m just saying that I heard some–

They both stop as another noise issues forth. They move forward a little and stop at a junction.

DWP 1: [calls:] Anybody out there?

No answer.

DWP 1: Must be a leaky pipe. I didn’t bring a wrench. You got a wrench?

DWP 2: I don’t have a wrench.

DWP 2 pulls out a matchbook.

DWP 1: Maybe we oughta go back up and get a wrench.

DWP 2: Now, wait a minute.

DWP 2 lights a match.

DWP 1: C’mon, Smitty, I’m feeling kinda queasy about the–

DWP 2: [interrupts, calling:] If anybody’s down there, come on out where we can see ya!

They look around nervously. DWP 2 tosses the match away as it burns his fingers and a fireball explodes almost on top of them. The DWP’s yell in fright – through the flames they see 2 strange-looking figures!

========== 01:30 to 02:51 ==========


========== 02:51 to 04:51 ==========

exterior (daytime) – city:

Hudson street:

In the garage at the Fidelity Warehouse Co., Johnny B and his band are practicing “Hard-headed Woman”.

Meanwhile, Gina is approaching the garage just as Johnny B starts the lyrics.

JOHNNY B: [singing:] Well a hard-headed woman, a soft-hearted man. Been the cause of trouble since the world began, uh-huh. Ever since the world began, la-hah. A hard-headed woman been a thorn in the side of man, uh-huh. Well Adam told Eve, “Listen here to me. Don’t you let me catch you messin’ round the apple tree”, oh yeah.

Gina gets to the open doorway of the garage. Johnny B notices and lifts his sunglasses to look at her.

JOHNNY B: Ever since the world began, ya-hah. A hard-headed woman been a thorn in the hide of man. Hey!

Johnny B starts playing it up. Gina smiles, then starts to dance.

JOHNNY B: Oh yeah! Ever since the world began, uh-huh. A hard-headed woman been a thorn in the side of man!

Johnny B and Gina dance in sync as he and the band play the instrumental break. Johnny B is getting really into his guitar playing when suddenly his guitar sparks. Everybody stops playing.

“STRETCH”: Whoa!

Gina looks on, shocked; “Stretch” runs over and unplugs Johnny B’s guitar.

“STRETCH”: I thought those doctor brothers of yours took care of that juice problem, B-Man.

JOHNNY B: Maybe it needs a little more insulation.

“Stretch” gives him a “Ya think?” look.

JOHNNY B: Better go to acoustic.

“STRETCH”: ’Kay.

“Stretch” reaches for the acoustic guitar; Johnny B puts his guitar down and glances back toward Gina – she’s gone!

JOHNNY B: Not again.

Johnny B jogs out of the garage and looks around – Gina is some distance away and hurriedly turning a corner. He jogs up to the corner (Why not use a speedrun? Still too frazzed by the guitar mishap?), but when he gets there Gina is nowhere in sight. Confused as to how someone could have disappeared so fast, Johnny B spots a manhole cover that's not fully closed and looks at it in thought.

========== 04:51 to 07:12 ==========

interior – humanidyne:


Miss Nance is at her desk, reading material on Hawaii and drinking out of a coconut with a straw. Billy, El, and Dick arrive – Billy and El are pulling a gurney with a sheet-covered body.

BILLY: Flaming mole monsters under the city? Richard, are you listening to yourself?

DICK: I’m listening and it has me terrified. Hayes–

But Billy isn’t any longer listening – he pulls a stack of tickets out of his pocket and wags them at Miss Nance.

BILLY: [competitively:] Twelve more, Miss Nance. Twelve more.

Miss Nance follows Billy as he goes to a chalkboard on the wall. At the top, it says: “Humanidyne Picnic Ticket Sales”; underneath is a poster that says “Win! A trip for two to… Hawaii” and names with the amount of tickets each person sold. (Some of the names are people who work on the show!)

BILLY: [chuckles] But don’t worry, there’s lots of time. [singing:] ???.

DICK: [to El:] This man you’re pushing. He wouldn’t happen to be dead, would he?

Billy writes “12” after his name on the board and sees next to “Nance” that it says “83”. (“Lincoln” has 3 tickets sold.)

BILLY: [incredulously:] Eighty-three?

Miss Nance is still reading her material on Hawaii as she stands there.

MISS NANCE: [confirming, somewhat smugly:] Eighty-three.

BILLY: [still amazed:] You sold eighty-three tickets to the company picnic? Who to?

MISS NANCE: Friends.

Billy starts toward the lab; Miss Nance follows; El (pushing the gurney) and Dick follow as well.

BILLY: [mostly to himself:] Eighty-three friends? I don’t even know eighty-three people.

MISS NANCE: [to Billy:] Oh, The Invisible Man was here today, for x-rays. Um, they came out blank, but we’re not sure he was standing in the right spot.

Billy gives her a look as they both go into the lab.

DICK: [to Billy:] I’m very glad to see you taking an interest in company activities, Hayes, but...

EL: [scoffing:] Company activities? All he’s interested in is winning that free trip to Hawaii.

H.I.T. lab:

El and Dick come into the lab – El pushes the gurney into the middle of the room and Dick joins Billy, who’s checking on an experiment. The “2 volunteers” are both in wetsuits – one sitting underwater in an aquarium with a face mask, breathing tube and oxygen tank, the other standing and watching.

DICK: [to Billy:] Could I interest you in mole monsters in the sewer?

BILLY: Yeah, if they hula.

Billy puts his finger in the water to test it, then gives the tech running the experiment a “Good job” sign and heads to his desk; Dick follows. El heads over to the experiment now.

DICK: Billy, this, uh, brigantine Antoinette exhibit’s very important to, uh, to the board.

Billy picks up a folder then looks for a pen.

DICK: You, uh, you understand that it was the Humanidyne diving bell that recovered the–the treasure. It’s more than a special project for me. Billy, this is more than a job!

Billy, writing, has the pen cap in his mouth. He takes it out to talk.

BILLY: Well, it sounds like a job for the police, Richard. Why don’t you give them a call?

Dick waves that idea away.

DICK: My party. Billy, the reception’ll be ruined tonight.

Billy listens as he goes back to what he was doing (pen cap back in his mouth), shaking his head at Dick sympathetically.

DICK: I–I’ll have insurance underwriters all–all–all–all over me! The papers’ll make a field day of it. Ho–how will that look?

El hands a clipboard over to the tech and heads toward Billy and Dick.

EL: I love it. [quoting an imaginary headline, the last word sounding spooky:] “Sunken treasure, jewel exhibit, monsters!”

El heads off as Billy follows suit with his own headline.

BILLY: “Mole monsters hold Humanidyne by the throat”. This is monstrous stuff. It’s horrendous stuff. It really is.

Behind Billy, the body on the gurney sits up. Dick gasps and points – Billy turns around – the ‘body’ is a guy in pajamas, yawning and wiping his eyes.

BILLY: Oh, hey, guys, the narcoleptic’s up. See if he wants to brush his teeth.

Dick covers his eyes in relief as 2 techs come to check on the narcoleptic. Billy heads off to check on stuff on the shelves; Dick follows.

DICK: It is horrendous. It’s horrendous. When the board nominated me for liaison with the museum, they were counting on me.

Billy nods.

DICK: Billy, they’re counting on me. If anything happens tonight – if anything spoils this exhibit – it’ll–it’ll–this’ll mean my career.

Dick stops, too choked up to continue.

BILLY: [placatingly:] Richard, Richard. Come on, stop talkin’ like that now. Come on, you know you’re our guy, huh?

DICK: Well…

Billy puts his arm around Dick and leads him to the door as he talks.

BILLY: Look, I’ll tell you what, tell you what. We’ll help you out under three conditions, okay?

DICK: [perking up:] Yeah?

BILLY: One is that you buy a couple picnic tickets from me.

DICK: [grumbling:] That’s blackmail.

But Dick pulls out his wallet anyway as Billy hurries on with condition 2.

BILLY: And two is that you bring someone else in here who has seen–

Billy is cut off by Johnny B arriving in the doorway.

JOHNNY B: Hayes, I think I just saw a girl run into a sewer. Could someone possibly be living underneath the city, or is that too wild?

Billy and Dick look at each other – that’s condition 2 taken care of. Billy puts his arm chummily around Dick’s shoulders and pats his back.

BILLY: And three, invite us to the big party tonight, huh?

Dick has some bills out, counting off what he’ll use for tickets. Not waiting, Billy takes 2 of them as Dick replies.

DICK: Oh no, I–I can’t. You have to have the invitations strictly come from [points upward] the board–the bo–

Johnny B takes a bill too (if Dick’s just giving it away…), but Dick snatches it back – only to have Billy take it.

BILLY: Thank you, Richard.

Billy heads out the door. Johnny B smiles at Dick, then follows. Dick looks at the money left in his wallet and frowns, counting through it.

========== 07:12 to 08:33 ==========

exterior (daytime) – museum grounds:

At the Los Angeles Maritime Museum, the Misfits have arrived in the Fundae; Dick and Al Buchre are also here. Billy is trying to sell more tickets as he, Dick, and Buchre head for the museum’s front door; El gathers his equipment from the Fundae and follows.

BILLY: I’m really hurt here, Richard. I–I am. I tell ya what, um, Mr. Buchre here buys a couple picnic tickets and we’ll call it a deal. I mean, it–it–it’s great. They’re two-fifty apiece, and that includes the keg race in the potato sack. It’s a crazy deal.

DICK: Billy, I’m sure if Mr. Buchre were interested in raffle tickets, he would certainly buy a ticket. He would certainly–

BILLY: [interrupts:] No, I think, I think a guy here with, you know, a thirty million dollar treasure can afford to buy a few tickets, don’t you think?

BUCHRE: Do ya? You should talk to my accountant. I just spent eight years and five hundred grand to find this stuff, now the state won’t let me sell it. [bitterly:] “Historical artifacts”.

EL: [disbelievingly:] Are you telling me you haven’t seen a cent, from all that work?

BUCHRE: You believe it? All I get is the money I charge to see the treasure, and the stupid headaches like this that come from exhibiting it. “Flaming mole monsters”. Frankly, if I were you blokes, I’d forget it.

Buchre heads into the museum; Billy tries to appeal to Dick again as Dick follows Buchre, but when Dick ignores him Billy turns to El.

BILLY: [to El:] So I guess that’s a “No” on the tickets?

El gives Billy a look and goes into the museum. Billy pulls out and counts the stack of tickets he has left, shrugs, then goes into the museum.

By the Fundae, Johnny B and Gloria are walking and talking.

GLORIA: [smiling:] Is this the same girl you were talkin’ about last week?

JOHNNY B: Yeah, she’s driving me crazy. I mean, she flirts, she listens to our music, she dances. It’s not like she’s shy or anything. But then when I try to talk to her, she brooms it, she’s gone.

GLORIA: [skeptically:] Down into a manhole?

JOHNNY B: It’s the only place I can figure.

GLORIA: [shivering:] I could never get near a place like that.

========== 08:33 to 12:52 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

In the sewer, Billy waits for Gloria, who's coming down the ladder; El and Johnny B start looking around.

GLORIA: [annoyed:] You said it was a tunnel, Billy!

BILLY: It is a tunnel. This is a tunnel.

GLORIA: It’s a sewer and I’m not staying!

Gloria starts back up the ladder.

BILLY: Hey, Glo, babe.

Gloria stops at the top of the ladder.

BILLY: I think you’re really limiting yourself here, okay? I mean, just think of this as a new life experience.

GLORIA: Okay. [comes down a step] I’ve seen it. [comes down another step] I’ve smelled it. [stops at the bottom and wags her finger in Billy’s face] And I don’t need it!

Gloria starts back up the ladder to leave, but Dick is coming down it now.

DICK: No, no, Gloria. No passing on this ladder.

BILLY: Alright. See? If Richard can–can make the effort, I think we all can, you know.

Gloria climbs down off the ladder and hugs her arms against herself; Dick climbs down (he’s wearing a safety hard hat).

DICK: [grumbling:] I certainly hope the board appreciates what I’m doing. [firmly:] There are no monsters down here. We will verify the fact that there are no monsters and I will get back to my...

BILLY: Look, Gloria, just take Richard’s hand and if there are any monsters or rats, he’ll take care of it.

Dick starts nodding in agreement, but then realizes what Billy said and takes a surprised step back.

GLORIA: Rats?!

Billy takes out his flashlight and tests it as he quickly changes the subject.

BILLY: Okay, everybody ready?

El and Johnny B head off.

GLORIA: Rats?!

BILLY: Misfits, Ho!

Billy heads off.

GLORIA: [holding her head and moaning:] Rats.

Dick takes Gloria’s arms and leads her forward gently.

DICK: [reassuringly:] No, Gloria, no. It’s–it’s perfectly al–

Dick breaks off with a jump and looks behind him. Gloria turns as well, but Dick turns her back, making an excuse for his jump.

DICK: I–I thought I left my keys– [breaks off and hurries Gloria forward] Oh! Let’s keep with the others.

In a branching tunnel, the Misfits and Dick’s approaching footsteps can be heard – perhaps the mole monsters are listening…

Now further down the tunnel, Billy has his headset on and is listening for sounds.

BILLY: Glo, come on, it’s alright. Forget what I said about the rats. This place is clean.

They all turn a corner into a branching tunnel and head forward.

BILLY: Aw now, she’s got nothing to worry about. This is–this is fine down here.

Suddenly 2 rats scurry by. Gloria screams and leaps into Dick’s arms (Dick gives an ‘Oof!’). Gloria covers her face with her hand; Dick holds his hard hat from falling off; Billy quickly removes the headset – ouch!

BILLY: You think you guys could maybe hold it down a little?

The rats have renewed Gloria's hatred of the sewer.

GLORIA: [to Billy, firmly:] I’m going back! [to Dick:] Put me down!

Gloria scrambles down out of Dick’s arms and heads off around the corner. Billy knows just what to say.

BILLY: Okay, if you wanna go up that looong hallway all by yourself, that’s fine with me.

Everyone waits. A few seconds later, Gloria comes slowly back, hugging her arms to herself again. Dick holds his hands out to her.

DICK: [reassuringly:] It’ll be alright. C’ mere.

That solved, Billy moves to the next problem.

BILLY: B-Man, can you help me out with this flashlight? It’s history, I think.

JOHNNY B: I think so.

Gloria goes to Dick and he puts his arm around her shoulders.

DICK: You know, we find them in nature and we’ve seen them in the Museum of Natural History. Uh, they’re God’s creatures and, just– Even though they’re filthy…

As Dick comforts Gloria, Billy removes the flashlight’s battery cover and holds the flashlight out. Johnny B dumps the battery out into his hand and gives it a quick recharge from his own electricity.

JOHNNY B: [dryly:] Another life saved.

Johnny B hands the battery back to Billy, who puts it back in and screws the cover back on.

BILLY: Great. I think that we’re ready to go, here. Let’s just see if this works.

The flashlight turns on.

BILLY: “Eveready good”. Alright.

They all head off – Dick still comforting Gloria. Once they leave, an eerie silence descends on the maybe-not-so-empty tunnel…

Coming around a corner, Billy has the headset back on and Gloria is clutching Dick’s arm.

DICK: Gosh, I hate to ask this, but, does anyone else have the feeling that we’re being watched?

BILLY: You’re sounding a little freaky, Richard. Let’s just keep moving, okay?

EL: Uh oh. Smells like something was burning here.

BILLY: Look.

Billy shines his flashlight on the wall: there are scorch marks.

BILLY: [takes off headset] Well, here’s the flaming part of what those guys saw.

Dick comes over and looks.

DICK: [quietly:] Well. What about the monster part?

Billy tries not to look nervous.

BILLY: It can’t be, uh, too much further away. [weakly:] Misfits, ho.

Some of the others nervously say it with him. Billy steps forward and suddenly a figure falls down to hang in his path.

BILLY: Whoa!

Everyone jumps back – Gloria squeals and uses her TK defensively on the figure, which busts apart with a bang. Pieces of clothes and wig settle to the floor – it was only a dummy. Dick removes his hard hat and wipes away the sweat.

DICK: Uh, thank you, Gloria.

BILLY: Whoa, Glo! Remind me not to jump out at your surprise party.

El picks up a piece of the dummy from the ground, examines it, and shows Billy a wire attached to it.

EL: You tripped it when you walked by.

BILLY: [in a quoting voice:] Ooh, really scary, kids.

GLORIA: Well, so much for the mole monsters. Now can we get out of here?

JOHNNY B: Wait a minute. This means there’s somebody down here and personally I’d like to find out who.

Johnny B pushes past Billy and heads forward; El follows.

EL: B-Man’s right. I mean, as long as we’re down here, we might as well see what we can find.

Dick looks at his watch.

DICK: [making an excuse:] It’s getting late.

Dick turns to leave, but Billy grabs his arm and leads him forward. Gloria is left standing there by herself.

GLORIA: [accusingly:] I’m gonna remember this! [glances around] As a matter of fact, I’m never gonna forget it.

Gloria hurries after the others. As they head down another tunnel, Johnny B coughs.

BILLY: Anyone feeling lightheaded?

JOHNNY B: I’m having a little trouble breathin’. Hey, look, there’s a light up ahead.

Johnny B jogs forward around the next corner. Billy follows more slowly; the other 3 hang back.

BILLY: Aw, B-Man, I think we’ve seen enough. I mean, it’s –the air down here is getting a little hanky.

EL: I think I’ll take an air sample.

GLORIA: And I think I should go back.

DICK: Fine with me.

Gloria and Dick start retreating backwards, but El grabs them both and leads them forward.

JOHNNY B: [calling:] Hayes, over here!

Billy and the others catch up to Johnny B – he’s found a corner with a makeshift room! There’s a bed, a lantern standing in for a lamp, and a couple posters on the wall. A boy, Zack, is resting in the bed. El and Dick stare; Gloria shakes her head; Johnny B bends down to check on Zack. Zack wakes, sees them, and quickly gets up to run off.

BILLY: Hey, kid!

JOHNNY B: Wait a minute!

But Zack pushes past them and hurries around a corner nearby. He tries to run, but he’s weak and stumbling, which causes him to trip. He catches himself against the wall and slides down into a sitting position. Billy and the others come around the corner and see Zack on the ground. Zack struggles to get up as they come closer.

BILLY: [reassuringly:] It’s okay, kid. It’s okay. No one’s gonna hurt you. Just take it easy. Just take it easy. [kneels by Zack] You’ re gonna be alright.

Zack faints into Billy’s arms. Gloria gasps.

GLORIA: Oh my gosh, is he okay?

BILLY: Yeah. [angrily:] It’s this damn air. Okay, that’s it! Everyone’s out of here.

Billy stands with Zack in his arms and heads for the exit.

BILLY: We gotta get him where he can breathe.

The others follow – Dick using his handkerchief to cover his mouth. After they’ve all gone, two figures with gas masks on step out of the shadows – they're the same 2 figures the DWP’s saw! One figure bends down and turns the valve all the way open on a tank on the ground.

========== 12:52 to 14:18 ==========

exterior (daytime) – museum grounds:

Back outside the museum, an ambulance has been called – the Misfits, Dick, Buchre, and a crowd are all gathered around it. Zack, in a stretcher with an oxygen mask on, is getting his pulse taken by an EMT. Gloria rubs Zack’s hair, then glances up at Johnny B, who’s standing in the Fundae cab, watching. 2 EMT’s lift the stretcher into the ambulance. El joins Billy, Dick, and Buchre, who are all standing at the side of the ambulance.

DICK: [to El, with concern:] Is he gonna be okay?

EL: He’s gonna be fine. He has a little pulmonary distress. Probably from breathing the bad air down there.

BILLY: Pretty soupy stuff, ya know?

BUCHRE: Did he see anything, or mention anything, about mole monsters?

BILLY: Well, Al, you know, I–I think you’re clear on that.

Dick smiles at this.

DICK: [happily:] Well, I for one am relived. I’m relieved, I’m grateful. I want to thank you all for coming on down here, and I wanna tell you that when someone does Dick Stetmeyer a favor, well, then–

BILLY: [jumping in:] They get invitations to the big party, right? [claps Dick on the shoulder] Yeah?

DICK: [unmoved by this chumminess:] No.

Billy reacts to each “No” as Dick emphasizes his position.

DICK: No. No, no, no, no.

Dick claps his hands in a stopping motion and raises his finger at Billy warningly.

At the ambulance’s back door, Gloria leans out to talk to Johnny B.

GLORIA: Johnny B, I’m just gonna ride with him. Jane’s gonna meet us down there.

JOHNNY B: Alright, I’ll see you later.

Gloria leans back inside the ambulance and an EMT closes the door.

GLORIA: [to Zack:] I brought your Walkman.

The ambulance pulls away, past a picnic table on the museum grounds, where Gina is sitting – she's been watching the proceedings. Billy and El join Johnny B at the Fundae as the crowd disperses.

BILLY: [to Johnny B:] What do ya figure, a runaway?

Johnny B steps down out of the cab and leans against it.

JOHNNY B: What else? Kid had the tunnel set up pretty well.

EL: Except for the air. Better hope nobody else is holed up down there.

Johnny B suddenly leans up – he’s spotted Gina. Gina sees that he’s seen her, grabs her purse and stands.

BILLY: [to Johnny B:] What?

Billy and El look where Johnny B is staring – Gina is hurrying off.

BILLY: Yeah, she’s pretty cute. She’s probably been watching me. I–I went over there.

Johnny B runs off after Gina.

BILLY: B-Man! B-Man, I don’t think that’s the right approach. [to El:] The man’s an animal.

========== 14:18 to 15:07 ==========

exterior (daytime) – pathway:

On a pathway (near the museum and beside the water), Gina is striding purposefully along. Johnny B catches up with Gina and starts walking backward, in step with her.

JOHNNY B: What is it with you, huh? Have I got some kind of disease, or something?

GINA: [curtly:] You play nice music, but you’re not in my plans.

JOHNNY B: Not in your plans? You don’t even know me!

GINA: Right.

JOHNNY B: [starting afresh:] Alright. My name’s Johnny–

Gina interrupts, brushing past Johnny B.

GINA: [shortly:] Johnny Bukowski, Johnny B, used to play with the Ray Bans, does a fair Bo Diddley imitation, and now has electrical problems with his amps.

Gina walks on with finality – implying that she doesn’t need to know anything more about him. Though slightly taken aback by Gina’s attitude, Johnny B is undeterred and follows after her.

JOHNNY B: [frustrated:] Wait a minute, huh?

GINA: Sorry, gotta go.

JOHNNY B: Well, what’s your name?

GINA: [flippantly:] Don’t have one.

Johnny B bolts the ground in front of Gina – she stops midstride, but doesn’t turn around.

JOHNNY B: Would you cut the bull and give me a straight answer?

GINA: [musing:] You have a strange way of getting a girl’s attention.

Johnny B waits – at least this is progress.

(“Walk of Life” starts.)

Gina finally turns and looks at Johnny B.

GINA: Gina. [smiling flirtingly:] Pay the bus fare and I’ll let you sit next to me.

Johnny B smiles back – this is more like it.

========== 15:07 to 16:17 ==========

exterior (daytime) – shopping district:

(“Walk of Life” plays.)

On a street in the shopping district, Johnny B and Gina get off the city transit bus. They jog across the street to Ray’s, a small clothing store with racks of clothes and accessories displayed outside. Gina smiles when she sees a sheer pink scarf on a jewelry stand. She grabs it up and drapes it around her neck glamorously as she looks at Johnny B.

GINA: Wanna help me find somethin’ classy? I’m goin’ to a party tonight.

Johnny B smiles at her exuberant attitude. Gina steps over to a rack of clothes. Johnny B trails with her and is about to lounge on a parking meter when Gina shoves her purse in to his arms.

GINA: Here, hold this.

Johnny B is surprised at the weight of the purse.

JOHNNY B: What d’ya have in here? The London Philharmonic?

GINA: [wounded:] Hey, that’s my life.

JOHNNY B: [mumbling, putting the purse over his shoulder:] Jeez.

Gina takes a bold, black, flowered skirt off the hanger and starts putting it on.

JOHNNY B: What are you doin’?

GINA: [cheerfully:] Well, I gotta try it on.

JOHNNY B: Out here?

GINA: [teasing:] Do you see a dressing room?

Johnny B turns away as Gina finishes putting the skirt on.

GINA: I like it. It’s fabulous!

Johnny B turns back and Gina models the skirt briefly. Johnny B reads the price tag on the skirt and steps over to a saleslady standing nearby. He pays for the scarf and skirt; Gina wraps the scarf around her hair and ties it on, smiling.

========== 16:17 to 16:51 ==========

interior – museum:

(“Walk of Life” plays.)

Inside the brigantine Antoinette exhibit room, Dick and Buchre are walking among the displays – Dick is almost giddy; Buchre looks preoccupied.

DICK: [smiling:] Aren’t you thrilled?

BUCHRE: Oh yeah.

DICK: [lowering his voice:] Does it make you nervous?

BUCHRE: Naw. Not at all, Richard.

DICK: You mustn’t let it. You know, the security here is tremendous. Absolutely bomb proof.

They arrive at a tall display cabinet, where a staff member finishes adjusting a tiara on a mannequin head.

DICK: [tsking:] Ah!

Dick does a tweak to the tiara himself, then nods to the staff member.

DICK: Thank you.

The staff member nods back and leaves.

BUCHRE: Listen, Richard. Can I ask you to do me a favor, mate?

DICK: Of course.

BUCHRE: Can I ask you to hold down the fort for a while? I’ve got a few things to check on.

Dick salutes smartly and grins.

DICK: Leave it to me, Al.

Buchre stares for a second, then leaves, rolling his eyes. Dick tweaks the tiara again, then looks around with a satisfied smile.

========== 16:51 to 17:33 ==========

interior – H.I.T. lab:

(“Walk of Life” plays.)

A patient is floating about 3 feet in the air, in a standing position. A tech hands him a heavy metal ball and the patient lowers slowly to the floor.

BILLY: [to El:] I’m telling ya, the poor guy’s up in the air.

Billy and El are at a desk together – Billy is doing calculations with his picnic tickets (pen cap in his mouth); El is working on a machine in parts around him.

EL: [patiently:] Of course he is. He’s floating.

Behind Billy and El, the tech takes back the metal ball and the patient floats back up.

BILLY: [takes pen cap out] Nah, not MacGreve. I’m talking about Buchre. The guy’s got thirty million in treasure he can’t sell. It’s just sittin’ there in front of ‘im. [annoyed:] Sort of like me and these picnic tickets.

Miss Nance arrives (wearing a Hawaiian dress and holding her stack of reading material) and stands beside the tech and the patient, who are repeating their experiment.

MISS NANCE: I’m leaving early, Dr. Hayes. [happily:] Herb just called and bought eighteen tickets.

El glances at Billy – he knows how Billy will take this.

MISS NANCE: I’m taking him bowling.

Miss Nance heads out.

BILLY: [critically:] Miss Nance, don’t you think bribing the ticket buyers is a little out of line? Miss Nance?

Billy looks behind him and sees that Miss Nance has gone. He turns back to El with a slight frown.

BILLY: Do I know a Herb?

EL: [reminding:] The Invisible Man.

BILLY: Oh. [musingly:] Bowling. Could be interesting.

========== 17:33 to 18:10 ==========

exterior (daytime) – shopping district:

(“Walk of Life” plays.)

Johnny B and Gina are walking along the sidewalk in front of the shops – Gina is wearing the pink scarf around her neck, but doesn’t have the skirt on; Johnny B is still carrying Gina’s purse.

JOHNNY B: Look, I know it’s none of my business. I mean, I don’t care where you live. I just think you should know that it’s dangerous down there.

GINA: [innocently:] What are you talking about? Where?

JOHNNY B: [pointedly:] In the tunnels.

GINA: [deflecting:] Bukowski, what is it with you and this tunnel fixation?

They approach a store that says “Used records and tapes” and has racks of records displayed outside.

JOHNNY B: We just pulled a kid out. I mean–

GINA: [interrupts:] And I told you I don’t know ‘im. Now, couldn’t we stop talkin’ tunnels and start talkin’ records?

Gina goes to a rack and starts flipping through. Johnny B joins her, going directly for a specific section.

JOHNNY B: Records...

Johnny B pulls out a copy of his album with the Ray Bans, ‘A Dangerous Man’, and shows it to Gina with a mischievous look.

JOHNNY B: An antique. Want one?

Gina dutifully looks, but then purposely counters Johnny B's tease by pulling out Police’s ‘Outlandos d’Amour’.

GINA: Could you buy me Sting instead?

JOHNNY B: Aww. You’re a killer.

Gina laughs.

========== 18:10 to 19:03 ==========

interior – Doctor’s Hospital, zack’s room:

(“Walk of Life” fades off.)

Inside the Doctor’s Hospital, Zack is in a hospital bed, wearing headphones and bopping to the music. Jane, standing by the bed, lifts one of the headphone ears (the song he's listening to is ‘Every Breath You Take’) and tries to talk to him.

JANE: Do you think that you could give me just a little hint of where you’re from? No words. Just nod your head. Okay?

Zack ignores her and continues bopping.

JANE: Los Angeles?

Zack glances up at Jane briefly, with a small glare.

JANE: San Fernando Valley?

Zack gives no response.

JANE: Northern California?

Zack rolls his eyes. Jane lets go of the headphone ear with a sigh, then heads to the other side of the room. Gloria, who’s been watching, stands up from leaning on a bureau and joins Jane.

GLORIA: Bit too hard to get through Sting, huh?

Jane gives into her frustration briefly, then decides not to be discouraged.

JANE: He’s been out on his own for a while. He just doesn’t wanna trust anybody.

GLORIA: Well, I didn’t wanna trust anyone either when they sent me to you.

JANE: Do you remember how I broke the ice?

Gloria thinks for a second, then smiles when she remembers.


Jane jabs her thumb toward the doorway in a ‘Well then, get on it’ motion. Gloria agreeably allows Jane to push her toward the door.

========== 19:03 to 20:17 ==========

exterior (daytime) – shopping district:

Johnny B and Gina are walking along the sidewalk among the crowd – Johnny B has his arm around Gina’s shoulders and is holding a hot dog in his other hand; Gina has her purse back and is holding a soft drink cup with a straw.

GINA: After I ran away from home at seven, I figured that was it. Since they’d had their chance, I had to take mine. It was ‘no relationships’ from then on. [ruefully:] Trust went out the window, and Gina went solo.

JOHNNY B: [sympathetically:] Doesn’t it get a little lonely?

They stop and face each other.

GINA: [realistically:] Yeah, but you don’t get hurt.

JOHNNY B: [protesting frankly:] Uh. I’m not here to hurt you.

Gina stares softly at him – is he going to kiss her? Johnny B returns her look, both of them feeling the moment of closeness. Johnny B leans in, Gina tilts her head up consentingly, and they kiss tenderly. When Johnny B pulls away he’s smiling, but Gina looks overwhelmed and uncertain and she glances away.

GINA: [overbrightly:] Hey. How ‘bout an ice cream sandwich?

Johnny B is slightly puzzled and disappointed, but decides to go with her request.

JOHNNY B: Yeah. Okay.

Johnny B heads off to get them; Gina looks troubled by how her heart is feeling, and gives an unhappy sigh. Johnny B arrives at the ice cream cart Gina saw and pulls out a small wad of money.

JOHNNY B: Let me get two ice cream sandwiches.

The vendor pulls out the order. Johnny B hands him his partly eaten hotdog and flips through the money, then hands over the amount. The vendor gives Johnny B the 2 ice cream sandwiches.

JOHNNY B: Thanks.

Johnny B turns around to rejoin Gina – but she’s run off on him again! Johnny B sags, upset at being left in the lurch.

========== 20:17 to 20:28 ==========


Inside the practice garage, “Stretch” is reading a newspaper and the other bandmembers are at their instruments when Johnny B comes in.

JOHNNY B: Hey, Stretch, if Hayes calls, tell him I went looking for that girl.

“STRETCH”: There’s a million miles of tunnels down there, man. How ya gonna find out where she lives?

JOHNNY B: I have a hunch it’s somewhere near the museum.

Johnny B heads off.

“STRETCH”: [scoffingly to the others:] ‘The Museum’. [calling after Johnny B, sarcastically:] I thought the Museum was in New York.

========== 20:28 to 20:44 ==========

interior – museum:

Inside the exhibit room, Dick is overseeing the food arrangements for the party.

DICK: Oh, this pâté is wonderful. It’s like velvet.

A staff member setting the table smiles at the compliment.

DICK: Like mole velvet. I’m gonna take a piece of this for Al. [takes a piece and looks around] Has anybody seen Al Buchre?

No one answers – the room seems empty but for Dick and the staff member. Dick heads off to look for Buchre.

DICK: He’s gotta taste this. [calling:] Al?

========== 20:44 to 20:54 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Down in the sewer tunnels, Buchre is walking with intent, carrying a flashlight. He stops and looks at his watch.

========== 20:54 to 21:31 ==========

interior – Doctor’s Hospital, hallway:

Inside the Doctor’s Hospital, Gloria is walking down the hallway with a pizza box. She's unaware that Gina (carrying the now giftwrapped record) is following, keeping her distance. Soon, Gloria turns and goes through a doorway toward Zack's room, but Gina stops and steps over to the nurse’s station, with a glance in the direction Gloria went.

GINA: Excuse me. I’m looking for the kid who was brought in from the Museum today.

The nurse smiles and points to the doorway Gloria went through.

NURSE: Just follow the girl with the pizza box.

GINA: [making up an excuse:] Um, I don’t wanna crowd ‘im. Could you just give him this, and tell him it’s from Gina?

Gina hands over the giftwrapped record and the nurse takes it with a smile.

NURSE: Sure.

GINA: Oh! And one more thing. My mother’s checking in soon for an operation. Do you have any rooms on this floor with a shower?

The nurse consults her clipboard.

NURSE: Three-forty-one’s empty [points the way] if you’d like to check it out.

GINA: [smiling:] Oh, thank you.

Gina heads off.

========== 21:31 to 22:03 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Down in the sewer tunnels, Buchre picks up a gas mask that’s resting on one of a stack of 4 large methane tanks. One of the “mole monsters” joins him and removes its own gas mask – revealing that he’s really Syl, a member of Buchre’s salvage team. Behind them, a few other henchmen are placing more methane tanks.

SYL: Gonna need that, mate. How many guards?

BUCHRE: Ten. Maybe twelve.

SYL: [confidently:] Scamper like the rest when the tunnels go.

Buchre puts on the gas mask and tests breathing through it; Syl turns and calls to one of the other members.

SYL: Here, make sure those valves are all the way open.

The other member makes an affirmative gesture and reaches to do so; Syl turns back to Buchre, who takes the gas mask back off.

BUCHRE: How are they holding the gas?

Syl examines the ceiling with his flashlight as he answers.

SYL: Well enough to panic five or ten city blocks. Providing some Jacks from maintenance don’t set off another tunnel on their own.

Buchre grimaces at this.

BUCHRE: We should be okay as long as there are no more surprises like that bloody kid.

========== 22:03 to 22:53 ==========

interior – Doctor’s Hospital, zack’s room:

In his hospital room, Zack has his headphones around his neck (Johnny B’s version of ‘Hard- headed Woman’ is playing from them) and is eating the pizza Gloria brought; Jane and Gloria are at the side of the bed, listening.

ZACK: My name is Zack, but don’t bother checkin’ it out with juvie hall or foster homes. I made it up.

Jane’s not thrown by this.

JANE: I like it. Do you live down there, Zack?

Zack looks down at his pizza and doesn’t respond.

JANE: Zack, I asked you if you lived down there.

ZACK: [sighs] Will you broom the questions? I don’t need your help, okay?

GLORIA: Hey, you do need our help if you live down there. The air’s bad. Really bad.

ZACK: Just the last day or so. We can handle it.

Jane and Gloria exchange looks.

GLORIA: ‘We’? Who’s ‘we’?

Zack looks away – he shouldn’t have said that.

JANE: Zack, are there more of you living down there?

Zack puts the headphones back on and ignores them. Gloria hangs her head – looks like they’re back to getting the silent treatment. Jane tries once again to be friendly.

JANE: Hey, you don’t have to be afraid of us. [as Dracula:] I don’t bite.

GLORIA: [playfully:] Yes, she does.

Jane gives Gloria a “Hey, where’d that come from?” look, which Gloria returns with a “Well, it’s kinda true, isn’t it?” look. Just then, the nurse (same one Gina talked to) arrives behind them.

NURSE: [cheerfully:] Excuse me, ladies.

Gloria and Jane part for her.

NURSE: [to Zack:] First pizza, now this.

Nurse holds out the giftwrapped record. Zack looks over and takes off his headphones.

NURSE: Supposed to say it’s from Gina.

Zack smiles.

========== 22:53 to 23:00 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Johnny B climbs down the ladder into the sewer tunnels. At the bottom, he looks around and turns on his flashlight, then heads forward.

JOHNNY B: [calling:] Gina!

========== 23:00 to 23:12 ==========

interior – Doctor’s Hospital, hallway:

Gina comes out of room 341 – she has a different hairdo (using the pink scarf), and is wearing different clothes, including the black flowered skirt. She walks over to an elevator and pushes the button. She glances over toward the nurse’s station and puts on a pair of white sunglasses, then heads purposefully into the elevator.

========== 23:12 to 23:19 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Down in the sewer tunnels, Johnny B continues his search for Gina.

JOHNNY B: [calling:] Gina!

========== 23:19 to 23:52 ==========

interior – humanidyne:


Billy, Jane, and Gloria are coming downstairs into the H.I.T. lab hallway – Billy is carrying a desk lamp.

BILLY: Jane, do you really think there are other people down there?


GLORIA: [in disagreement:] Yes!

Billy halts them.

BILLY: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait a minute. Let’s pick one.

Jane and Gloria both give him a sighing look, then Gloria turns Jane toward her.

GLORIA: [seriously:] I can tell when a kid’s lying.

Jane looks down at her stomach as her baby kicks.

JANE: I can tell when a kid’s kicking.

Billy waves his hand in a giving-up motion and starts back on his way; Jane and Gloria follow.

GLORIA: [worried, trying to convince them:] Hey, it could just be this Gina girl, or there might be more. As long as there’s gas down there, we gotta do something.

H.I.T. lab:

Billy opens the door to the lab and the 3 of them enter, just as a loud bang and flash come from a chemical test El is conducting.

BILLY: Whoa. Jeez, El, are you okay?

El looks over with a happy laugh.

EL: Yeah, yeah, couldn’t be better.

Billy, Jane, and Gloria join El.

BILLY: Well, what was that?

EL: Great. I finally isolated the gas that’s in those tunnels.

JANE: What is it?

EL: Methane.

Billy and El share a concerned look.

BILLY: Girls? How’d you like to crash a party?

========== 23:52 to 25:07 ==========

exterior (nighttime) – museum grounds:

At the museum, Dick’s party has started. Out front, by the colorful, lit-up, multi-stream art fountain, a car arrives and some party guests exit it.

interior – museum:

In the exhibit room, there are many elegantly-dressed guests walking among the exhibits and food tables. At the door, Doorman is greeting still-arriving guests.

DOORMAN: [taking someone’s invitation:] Thank you.

Gina is the next to arrive, pausing at the sign (“Antoinette sunken treasure exhibit”). She puts on the air of an invited VIP and walks past Doorman as though she belongs there.

DOORMAN: [turning:] Excuse me, miss?

Gina pauses aloofly.

GINA: Yes?

DOORMAN: [reminding:] Your invitation.

Gina steps close to Doorman and coolly looks him in the eyes.

GINA: [lazily:] Do you mean we were supposed to bring them? How gauche.

Gina saunters off.

DOORMAN: [shaking his head:] Celebrities.

Elsewhere in the room, Dick is taking a few guests on a tour.

DICK: We were simply interested in the technology. We had no idea that Mr. Buchre would discover all this much. Come, come, come here and take a look at this.

Dick leads them to a display cabinet (the one where the tiara is) and points at a goblet.

DICK: Let’s take a look at this goblet. This goblet alone is worth over six thousand dollars. Uh, six hundred thousand dol– I’m not sure which, but, uh, Mr. Buchre would know. But, he’s not here. He jus–he keeps disappearing.

========== 25:07 to 25:18 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Down in the sewer tunnels, Johnny B comes to a junction. He looks between them, his vision blurring a little, then chooses one. He heads off down that tunnel, coughing.

========== 25:18 to 25:43 ==========

exterior (nighttime) – museum grounds:

Outside the museum, the Fundae drives up. Jane and Gloria exit the cab as El looks at Billy, who’s in the driver’s seat.

EL: [complaining:] Oh, couldn’t we have just called, Billy? I mean, if you’re doing all of this just for the hors d’oeuvres.

BILLY: El, this could be an emergency. I know– Look, this is not the right time to start worrying about not having an invitation, ya know?

Billy and El both exit. Valet arrives behind Billy and looks critically at the Fundae.

BILLY: I mean, pleeease, it’s not gonna be that snobby. I know what’s going on at these places.

Billy tosses the Fundae keys to Valet.

BILLY: Park it where I can see it, okay, bud?

Valet tosses the keys right back and jabs his thumb over his shoulder.

VALET: Hey, the service entrance is around the back.

BILLY: I don’t think you understand. We’re–

El cuts Billy off by grabbing him by the back of his jacket. He then pushes Billy into the Fundae and follows him inside.

========== 25:43 to 26:45 ==========

interior – museum:

Inside the museum, Billy peeks his head around the corner (that leads to the kitchen) to check out the party going on in the exhibit room. He looks both ways, deems it safe, and comes fully into view, acting nonchalant. A guest walks by and Billy quickly pretends to be examining a wall. After the guest leaves, Billy walks casually further into the room before looking back the way he came.

BILLY: Psst!

El, Jane, and Gloria all peek their heads around the corner.

BILLY: [mouths:] Come on.

The other 3 shake their heads vigorously.

BILLY: [hisses:] Come on!

The others give in and come single file around the corner, each grabbing a piece of food from the buffet table as they come and join Billy.

BILLY: Just cool it, alright? I–I know coming through the kitchen isn’t the grand entrance, but it doesn’t mean these people don’t respect us. I mean, I’m telling you, these people need us.

Just then, Doorman comes up to the group.

DOORMAN: Oh, good. I’m so glad you’re here.

Billy smiles at the others, like “See, what did I tell ya?”. El pauses with the bite of food held up to his mouth and gives a half smile – maybe Billy wasn’t so wrong after all.

DOORMAN: The leaky toilet’s in the second-floor men’s room.

Doorman leaves and Billy blinks as the words hang in the air. The others glare at Billy.

JANE: Hayes.

Billy looks at all 3 of them glaring and raises a reminding finger.

BILLY: Dignity is something you wear inside, Jane.

Gloria rolls her eyes; Jane sighs.

BILLY: Look, let’s just spread out and see if we can find Stetmeyer, okay?

Billy heads off.

========== 26:45 to 26:53 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Johnny B shines his flashlight down a tunnel – he’s heard something.

JOHNNY B: [calls:] Gina, is that you?

There’s no answer, but he heads off down the tunnel anyway, coughing again.

========== 26:53 to 28:28 ==========

interior – museum:

In the exhibit room, at the party table, Gina is keeping out of view behind a flower arrangement and placing sandwiches from a platter into a napkin. She straightens, wrapping the napkin up and putting it in her purse, and calls to a passing waiter.

GINA: Waiter? Excuse me. Sir, we need some more sandwiches here.

In the background, El, walking through the crowd looking for Dick, spots Gina. The waiter takes the platter and Gina gives him a polite wave and smile as he heads off.

GINA: Thank you.

Gina takes a drink from a wine glass and heads off, putting on her act again. El watches her leave.

Elsewhere, Jane and Gloria are walking up a ramp, past 2 women walking the opposite direction. One of the women gives Jane’s outfit a sneering look.

WOMAN: [to her companion, loudly:] I know clothes are difficult to find when you’re pregnant, but isn’t that pushing it a bit?

Jane and Gloria stop and stare after the 2 women, then exchange a look. Gloria gets an angry look on her face and uses her TK to roll down the zipper on the back of the rude woman’s dress until part of her underclothes are showing. Gloria and Jane share a smile and laugh before heading back on their way.

Elsewhere, El has found Billy, who has 2 plates of hors d’oeuvres (so he did come for them…).

EL: Billy, psst!

BILLY: What?

El drags Billy away from the crowd.

EL: Come on.

BILLY: What? What is it?

They reach a quieter corner and El sets down the equipment bag he’s been carrying over his shoulder.

EL: You’re not gonna believe this. I couldn’t find Richard anywhere–

Billy hands El one of the plates, and starts adding a couple of pieces from his plate onto El’s plate.

EL: Thanks. But I did see that wannabe that was flirting with Johnny B.

El thinks this could be significant, but Billy is more interested in the food.

BILLY: Try one of these, they’re terrific. The ones with the little red balls on top.

El starts putting them back on Billy’s plate.

EL: I don’t like caviar. [insisting:] Don’t you think it’s a little strange that she’s here?

BILLY: [scoffs:] What caviar? The little balls on top of that are red. [unconcerned:] Oh look, I’ll have Glo call Johnny B, it’ll be all right.

Billy puts a piece back on El’s plate, but El puts it right back.

EL: [correcting:] Salmon caviar’s red.

El sets down his plate. Billy starts to put a piece in his mouth, then freezes as what El said sinks in. He sets down his plate with a thump.

BILLY: Sa–salmon eggs are for fishing, El. They use ‘em as bait.

Billy points at his plate, suddenly worried what the other things are.

BILLY: Wha–what’re–what’re these little rice cakes with the yellow gooey stuff on top? What is that?

Billy and El both lean down to look closer. The 2 women Jane and Gloria encountered earlier arrive, heading for the corner to fix the zipper that’s been “mysteriously” pulled down. Behind the women is Doorman, who spots Billy and El.

DOORMAN: [sternly:] There you are. I’ve been looking all over for you.

Doorman strides over to Billy and El.

DOORMAN: The bathroom is–

Doorman grabs them both by the collar, accidentally triggering El to shrink. The rude woman gives a small shriek; Doorman turns a stunned look on Billy, who waves his hand dismissively.

BILLY: It’s a long story.

Dick, walking by, spots Billy and immediately fears the worst.

DICK: [fretfully:] Hayes?

BILLY: Let’s talk, Richard.

Billy steps around behind Doorman and leaves. The 2 women head into the women’s bathroom behind them; Doorman stares after Billy then down where El went. El, shrunk, stands up behind the pile of his gear and clothes, and looks up at Doorman.

========== 28:28 to 28:40 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Down in the sewer tunnels, Johnny B is getting really dizzy and loopy now, but he’s continuing to push himself onward. He coughs some more and spots a tank of methane.

========== 28:40 to 29:07 ==========

interior – museum:

DICK: Methane? I told the bartenders only to serve–

EL: Richard. Methane. It’s a gas.

Billy and El have just explained about the methane to Dick (El isn’t shrunk, so it must’ve been fifteen minutes).

DICK: A what?

BILLY: It’s a flammable gas.

Dick’s mouth drops open in surprise.

BILLY: Do ya remember what happened in the Fairfax district? Well, the concentration built up so much, boom! The whole thing went.

DICK: That was methane?

EL: Right. And according to my calculations, the concentration under here could be higher than Fairfax was.

Dick’s mouth drops open again. He glances at Jane who also looks serious.

EL: This is something we should report right away.

DICK: First mole monsters, and now methane.

Dick crosses his arms, shaking his head at his plight.

========== 29:07 to 29:41 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Johnny B looks up dizzily from his discovery of the methane tank and sees 2 guys in gas masks coming toward him. He doesn’t have a chance to react before they grab him roughly and punch him in the midsection, pushing him back a few feet. Johnny B swings a left, which hits one of his attackers and sends the masked man sprawling. Johnny B swings his fist again, slugging the second man, who falls backward against the pipes. The first man regains his footing and comes after Johnny B again. He slams into Johnny B and shoves him up against the wall, then puts his arm across Johnny B’s throat, trying to choke him. Johnny B struggles against his attacker’s hold – he’s weakened by the bad air, but the two men aren’t because of their masks. He finally pushes the guy away, but falls forward himself – into the arms of the second man, who tries to hold him defenseless. But Johnny B breaks out of this hold as well – with a backwards elbow punch to the guy’s face. His attacker falls to the floor with a grunt. Johnny B tries to get his wind back as he readies himself for taking on the first man again. The first man steps forward menacingly, but not too worriedly – he can see that Johnny B is weaving dizzily. Johnny B raises his arms out in front of him and clasps his hands together, intending to use a bolt and finish this fight.

JOHNNY B: Who the hell are you?

Johnny B never fires off any electricity however, his hands just glow feebly once or twice, and then he’s overcome by the methane – his vision blurs and he just can’t remain on his feet any longer. The first man raises his fist, in case Johnny B needs some help going down, but Johnny B passes out completely, his last sight that of the ground rushing up to meet him.

========== 29:41 to 29:52 ==========

interior – museum:

Gloria joins Billy, El, Jane, and Dick to report, having just called to try and reach Johnny B.

GLORIA: He wasn’t home. I talked to one of the guys in the band.

JANE: Yeah?

GLORIA: [worried:] Well, he went into the tunnels looking for that girl. Looking for Gina.

Billy and El exchange worried looks.

EL: Billy, if he even sparks

BILLY: [holds up his hand] Don’t tell me!

This is bad, they have to think of something…

========== 29:52 to 30:44 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Syl rolls Johnny B (who’s still passed out) onto his back as Buchre arrives and kneels beside them.

BUCHRE: Bukowski.

Syl takes off his gas mask.

SYL: [surprised:] You know ‘im?

BUCHRE: I met him. Damn, what’s he doing here?

SYL: [worried:] What are we going to do with him? That’s the question.

Buchre thinks for a second.

BUCHRE: Leave him.

SYL: Just a minute, Al. Now, blowin’ up some tunnels is one thing, but killin’ a fella…

Buchre looks at Syl coldly.

BUCHRE: That damn salvage kill a part of you, Syl? Thirty million dollars. Is he worth it?

Syl swallows nervously, still uncomfortable with the thought of what they’re about to do.

BUCHRE: Let’s just finish what we came here to do.

Buchre gets up and heads off. Syl angrily gives in to seeing it Buchre’s way.

SYL: [to himself:] Right.

Syl rolls Johnny B back onto his stomach and leaves him there.

SYL: [calling after Buchre:] I’ll set the rest of the timers, [stands, picking up his gas mask] and then get out of here.

Syl places a timer onto a methane tank and it starts counting down from 20 minutes!

========== 30:44 to 31:16 ==========

interior – museum:

At the party table, Gina is putting some fried chicken in her purse as Billy spots her.

BILLY: Gina!

Billy, El, Jane, and Gloria join Gina at the table.

BILLY: Hey, we’ve been looking all over for you.

GINA: Okay, okay, look. So I don’t have an invitation. You wanna throw me out?

JANE: [quickly:] No, no. Gina, we’re friends of Johnny B.

GLORIA: [getting to the point:] He went down into the tunnels looking for you. We gotta find him, fast.

EL: It’s very dangerous for him to be down there.

Gina shakes her head – she still doesn’t want to admit to living down in the tunnels.

GINA: Unh-uh. You are talking to the wrong person.

Jane clears her throat pointedly. Gloria glares at Billy, who looks up at El. El raises his eyebrows in a “Well, go on” look. Billy rolls his eyes.

========== 31:16 to 31:26 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

A figure wearing jeans and scuffed-up sneakers comes up to Johnny B (still unconscious) and starts dragging him away along the tunnel floor.

========== 31:26 to 31:40 ==========

interior – museum:

Billy launches into convincing mode.

BILLY: Look, Gina. Listen, you’ve gotta understand what we’re trying to tell ya here. Now, you’ve got to realize that if there’s anybody else down there, they’re in very grave danger, too.

JANE: Zack didn’t say anything, but we have a feeling there are more of you.

Gina thinks.

========== 31:40 to 32:09 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels, Gina’s place:

In a bed, Johnny B coughs once and wakes up.


Johnny B looks around: the room is well stocked with books, records, posters on the walls, and other things necessary for making it comfortable to live in. On a second bed beside him are 4 kids, all staring at him.

JOHNNY B: Who are you? Where’s Gina?

One of the 3 boys, a skinny, brown-haired teenager, Nick, speaks up – not answering Johnny B’s questions however.

NICK: The air’s better in here. You’ll be okay.

Johnny B gives this statement a frown and looks around his surroundings again. The curly-haired girl teenager, Hilly, speaks up next.

HILLY: You’re the guy in the band that plays in that garage on Hudson. Gina took me last week to listen to ya. You’re good.

Johnny B takes the compliment, but is more concerned about Gina’s whereabouts.

JOHNNY B: Thanks. Wher–do ya know where she is?

NICK: She’s at a party, I think.

Johnny B reacts.

========== 32:09 to 32:27 ==========

interior – museum:

Jane and Gloria watch as Billy continues his speech to Gina.

BILLY: Gina, look, they’re all swimming around in a sea of methane down there. With a human sparkler.

El, looking serious, glances at Jane and Gloria, who exchange a look.

BILLY: Don’t–you gotta understand something, I mean, one spark from Johnny B and we’re talkin’ the Fourth of July here!

GINA: [suddenly remembering:] Those guys in masks!

Billy looks at El – guys in masks?

GINA: I thought they were city guys, spraying for cockroaches or something.

EL: Whoa! What guys in masks?

========== 32:27 to 33:11 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels, Gina’s place:

Johnny B gets up heavily from the bed, coughing again. He walks a few feet and stands (still a little wobbly), facing the kids.

JOHNNY B: Does she live here?

HILLY: We all do. We’re her family sort of, you know? Mama Gina.

NICK: Yeah.

Nick gets up and stands by Johnny B.

NICK: Ya know, it’s a lot better than livin’ on the street. Or where the County put us.

Hilly joins them.

JOHNNY B: And that kid we pulled out this morning?

HILLY: Zack? Is he okay? We wondered what happened to ‘im.

JOHNNY B: Yeah, he’s fine.

Johnny B goes over to the headboard of the other bed and leans on it.

JOHNNY B: But, uh, we won’t be if we stay here very much longer.

NICK: [shrugs] Well, just forget about gettin’ out.

HILLY: We tried, but we can’t get far enough through the tunnels.

NICK: It’s too thick! This morning there were still some good air pockets, but they’re gone, so we just figured we’d ride it out.

Johnny B leans back against the wall, his breathing still a bit labored.

JOHNNY B: I don’t think that’s a very good idea. I mean, I can feel the gas comin’ in.

Nick and Hilly exchange looks.

========== 33:11 to 34:04 ==========

interior – museum:

Dick returns to the exhibit room, with Buchre.

DICK: Oh, here they are. Uh, right this way, please. Right this way.

Dick leads Buchre over to a corner of the room, where Billy, El, Jane, Gloria, and Gina are now gathered (Jane, Gloria, and Gina are all sitting down).

DICK: Billy, Billy, I–I found him. Here he is.

BUCHRE: Richard’s filled me in on this methane stuff and I think it’s ridiculous. You’re making a big deal out of nothing. You always have methane under the city.

BILLY: Methane that’s being pumped in?

Buchre keeps his face calm.

DICK: [frowning:] What?

BILLY: Gina said she saw men with gas masks on, bleeding tanks into the tunnels.

BUCHRE: [brushing it off:] They’re probably just city employees.

EL: [sighs] Are you willing to take that chance?

Gina – seeing that they’re all caught up in their discussion – quietly gets up and leaves, unnoticed.

EL: Because if the methane concentrations are high enough, and someone – or something – sparks…

BILLY: Boom!

DICK: Boom?

[together:] GLORIA: Boom! JANE: Boom!

Buchre sees that he can’t talk them out of their concern.

BUCHRE: Alright. Wait a minute. If you’re that concerned, let’s at least do it right and call the professionals. Would ya feel better if I called the fire department and had them check it out?

BILLY: That’s a start.


Buchre gives Dick a nod and leaves. Dick smiles, calmed by Buchre’s command of the situation.

DICK: Isn’t he terrific? He’s terrific.

Nobody else agrees with him. Gloria rolls her eyes; Jane squeezes Gloria’s shoulder with an amused smile.

========== 34:04 to 34:07 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

On the methane tank, one of the timers counts down further, from “10:14” to “10:11”.

========== 34:07 to 34:24 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels, Gina’s place:

Johnny B and the kids are crouched on the floor. Nick coughs – the air is definitely bad in here now also.

JOHNNY B: Okay, you guys stay down low, methane rises. I’ll be back with some help as soon as I can.

NICK: You’re not gonna make it, man. It’s eight blocks to the nearest grate.

Johnny B stands up, walks a few feet away, puts on his sunglasses, and turns back.

JOHNNY B: Watch me.

Johnny B zips off in a speedrun.

========== 34:24 to 34:48 ==========

interior – museum:

Preparing to go into the tunnels, El is showing Gloria how to use a gas mask and Billy is checking over his gas mask. Dick is standing by them.

DICK: [to Billy:] This is an order. You’re not going anywhere, you’re gonna stay right here until the authorities arrive. Do you understand?

Billy, not really listening, grabs some food off a passing waiter’s plate.

BILLY: Listen, Richard, could you save me a couple-a these, an–and some of the ones with the little squiggly Spam stuff on top.

DICK: [snaps:] That’s liver. Pâté.

Billy blinks at Dick’s anger.

DICK: [sternly:] Now look, there are hundreds of tunnels down there. How do you ever expect to find him, anyway?

BILLY: With Gina.

Billy looks toward where he last saw Gina – she’s gone!

BILLY: Hey. Hey, where’d she go?

El and Gloria exchange an “Uh-oh!” look.

========== 34:48 to 35:08 ==========

exterior (nighttime) – museum grounds:

Gina exits through the front door of the museum in a rush, but slows to an inconspicuous pace as she passes some incoming party guests. As soon as she’s out of their sight, she speeds up again and steps over to the sewer grate that’s out front. She looks around to see if the coast is clear, then pulls off the heavy grate with a grunt and climbs down inside.

========== 35:08 to 35:26 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Down in the sewer tunnels, Johnny B comes out of his speedrun to take a breather – right by a couple of the methane tanks. He leans on the wall and breathes heavily for a minute, then notices something on one of the sewer pipes. He shuffles closer: it’s a timer, counting down. He removes it from the pipe and hurries off.

========== 35:26 to 35:39 ==========

interior – museum:

Behind a desk at the door of the exhibit room, Buchre is on the phone to Syl.

SYL: [from phone, gleefully:] They told you to call the fire department? That’s great!

BUCHRE: [into phone:] Are you ready?

SYL: [from phone:] Yeah, we’re ready.

exterior (nighttime) – alley:

In an alley near the museum, Syl, now dressed like a fireman, is on a portable phone to Buchre. Behind him the rest of the henchmen are also dressed like firemen.

SYL: [into phone:] Will you be around soon?

BUCHRE: [from phone:] I’m leaving right now. They'll make the big bang in… ten minutes?

SYL: [into phone:] Right.

Syl hangs up.

========== 035:39 to 36:46 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Johnny B comes out of his speedrun by some more methane tanks. He plucks another timer off the pipe above him (it says “07:30”) and is about to head off again when suddenly Gina arrives.


GINA: They told me you were down here. I didn’t believe ‘em.

JOHNNY B: Gina, we gotta get out of here.

Johnny B takes Gina’s shoulder and starts to lead her away, but Gina resists.

GINA: [breathlessly:] I got some people I gotta see.

JOHNNY B: I was just there. You’ll never make it, there’s no air. We gotta get help.

GINA: [stubbornly:] I don’t need help.

Gina heads off but Johnny B grabs her arm and pulls her back.

JOHNNY B: [somewhat angrily:] What are you so afraid of? I mean, you can’t live your life solo.

GINA: That’s the way I do best, okay? [accusingly:] The minute you let people in, they start screwin’ up your life.

Johnny B is annoyed that Gina doesn’t seem to get it.

JOHNNY B: [angrily:] I’m not–I’m not talkin’ about a relationship here. I’m talkin’ about getting me out of this tunnel so I can get some help for your friends.

Gina just turns and heads off again, her face set determinedly, but she stops as Johnny B adds something else.

JOHNNY B: [angrily:] Look, maybe not giving a damn works for you, but it doesn’t for me.

Gina turns to face him and they stare at each other for a moment, while Gina thinks about Johnny B’s words. When Gina makes no move to co-operate, Johnny B gives up.

JOHNNY B: [taking on Gina’s attitude:] Forget it. I don’t need help either.

Gina takes a few deep breaths, making a tough decision, then comes back to stand in front of Johnny B.

GINA: I gotta get them out of there.

Gina looks Johnny B squarely in the eye and says something she hasn’t said to anybody in a long time.

GINA: Help me.

Johnny B gives a weak sigh of relief.

========== 36:46 to 37:21 ==========

interior – museum:

BILLY: Just get everyone outside, Richard.

Billy, El, Jane, Gloria, and Dick are hurrying along.

BILLY: The tunnel entrance in the basement’s filled with gas. We’ll say we got a big firecracker.

DICK: [stressed:] Well, what can I say?! How’m I gonna break it to everyone?

Billy has no chance to answer as suddenly Johnny B arrives and staggers into a waiter carrying a tray of glasses. Jane shrieks and the others react as the waiter and the tray go crashing to the floor.

JOHNNY B: [shouts:] Everybody get outta here! There’s gonna be an explosion! Get out!

El hurries over to Johnny B; Billy turns to an open-mouthed Dick.

BILLY: I think he just said it for ya, Richard.

The party guests start filing out of the exhibit room. Johnny B rests against a table with Gina beside him, her arms on his shoulders. El presses an oxygen mask to Johnny B’s mouth, but Johnny B pushes it away to speak.

JOHNNY B: [gasping:] There’s people down there, we gotta go back.

El presses the mask back over Johnny B’s mouth.

EL: [firmly:] You are not going anywhere.

BILLY: Well, we gotta do something. [looking pointedly at Gina:] We gotta get ‘em outta there.

Billy and Gina have a staring battle for a moment, then Gina gives in.

GINA: Okay. I’ll take ya.

Billy smiles – success! – then takes a timer Johnny B hands him. (Behind Billy, Dick is directing the evacuation procedure.)

JOHNNY B: Timers. I found ‘em. There hafta be more.

El’s been handed one also.

EL: Blasting caps.

BILLY: Does yours say the same as mine?

El looks at the timer in his hand: it says “05:30”.

EL: [solemnly:] Five and a half minutes.

Billy looks to Gina – is that enough time? – and Gina looks daunted.

========== 37:21 to 37:31 ==========

interior – museum:

DICK: Hurry! But, hurry, uh, slowly, if–if you would.

Dick is still directing the evacuation effort.

DICK: Say listen, I’m–we’re gonna do this again. Okay, everybody hurry right along.

========== 37:31 to 37:51 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Down in the sewer tunnels, Johnny B is climbing down the ladder to join Billy, El, Gloria, and Gina, who are already there. He coughs and trips off the last few rungs. Gina reaches to help him catch his balance.

BILLY: Aw, hell, B-Man, you can’t take another trip down there. Look at you.

JOHNNY B: Naw, I’m cool, let’s go.

Gina takes the oxygen mask El hands her.

JOHNNY B: Come on, Gina.

Johnny B takes Gina’s hand and they head forward, but Billy grabs Johnny B’s arm.

BILLY: Hey. You can’t take that kinda risk, B-Man. Come on.

JOHNNY B: I’m fine. Gimme a mask.

Johnny B takes the mask Billy is holding.

JOHNNY B: [taking Gina’s hand again] Gina, come on.

Johnny B and Gina head off. Billy sighs and follows, putting on his mask. El and Gloria bring up the rear, both wearing masks.

========== 37:51 to 38:02 ==========

interior – museum:

Inside the exhibit room, now vacated of all the staff and party guests, Dick pours himself a large glass of champagne, then holds it up in a toast.

DICK: [mournfully:] Here’s to the end of an otherwise fabulous career.

========== 38:02 to 38:44 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels, Gina’s place:

The Misfits and Gina turn a corner (The scene is actually a reverse of a later scene, at 39:08, with just Billy, El, and Gloria – you can tell since the “methane” label on the tanks is backwards!) and arrive at the room where the kids are.

JOHNNY B: This place is gonna blow up. We gotta get outta here, fast.

El and Johnny B hand masks out to the kids and help them toward the doorway. Gina puts her mask over Hilly’s mouth.

GINA: Here.

Billy sees a kid grabbing up some records.

BILLY: Hey, no, no. Forget those, there’s no time. Gina.

Billy goes over to Gina as Gloria helps the kid to hurry.

BILLY: Gina, look, is there any kind of large opening out of these tunnels? Something big enough to vent the gas, serve as a safety valve if it explodes.

GINA: Just sewer grates mostly, not very big.

Nick, on his way out, turns back.

NICK: Wait, wait, there’s a fountain! About a couple hundred yards from here.

GINA: [shaking her head:] He can’t get into it, it’s always locked up tight.

BILLY: Which way?

GINA: You won’t have time.

BILLY: [insisting:] Which way?

GINA: [points] Down that tunnel.

Billy turns to Johnny B.

BILLY: B-Man, you and Gina, you take them upstairs, okay? We’re gonna check out the fountain.

Billy and El head off; Johnny B takes Nick’s shoulder.

JOHNNY B: Let’s go, we’re running out of time.

Johnny B heads off with Nick. Gina looks around, touching her shoulder – she's realized she doesn't have her purse.

GINA: Wai–wait a minute. I– You go with them, I–I gotta find my bag. Go on.

Hilly (still holding the mask to her mouth) nods and leaves. Gina coughs.

========== 38:44 to 39:08 ==========

exterior (nighttime) – alley:

In the alley, Buchre is giving last-minute instructions to Syl and the other henchmen (still dressed as firemen).

BUCHRE: The explosion’ll take out the tunnels and bring real fire trucks so you’ll blend right in.

SYL: We go straight for the treasure?

BUCHRE: That’s right. No stalling, no looking around. And the alarm system will get knocked out?

SYL: Sure.

BUCHRE: Right. Get as much as you can and get out. Good luck, mate.

SYL: Piece o’ cake.

Buchre leaves; Syl turns to the others.

SYL: Hey, shake it up!

========== 39:08 to 39:57 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels, beneath the fountain:

Billy, El, and Gloria (all 3 wearing masks) turn a corner and come to a stop. (This is the scene that’s reversed earlier, at 38:02)

BILLY: [through mask:] This is it. This has to be the fountain entrance that Gina was talking about.

Billy tries the doors.

BILLY: [through mask:] Locked!

Billy turns to the others and lifts his mask.

BILLY: They’re always locked!

Gloria opens the slot in the doors and pulls her mask away from her face to look through: inside is a small maintenance room for the fountain above.

GLORIA: There’s no hole?! I thought we needed a hole?!

Billy looks through the slot.

BILLY: Well, if we can just get these doors open, that would just leave the floor of the fountain. And that oughta come off like a piece of paper when the thing explodes. That’s true, isn’t it, El?

EL: I don’t think we’re gonna live long enough to make the calculations. [answering anyway:] Maybe.

BILLY: Well, we gotta get inside. Can you do it?

Billy pulls back slightly and El (his mask lifted) bends down to size up the slot.

EL: I think I can fit through here.

El straightens back up and Billy starts helping him remove his equipment bag.

EL: My clothes are in the lunchbox.

Gloria retrieves the tiny clothes and hands them to El.

GLORIA: [through mask:] Here ya are.

EL: Here goes.

BILLY: Hit it.

El presses the back of his neck; Billy quickly reaches up and grabs hold of the mask still resting on El's head as El shrinks down.

========== 39:57 to 40:09 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Johnny B and the kids hurry through the tunnels – they’re coughing heavily and passing the oxygen masks between each other. They pass a timer, which has less than 2 minutes left!

========== 40:09 to 41:06 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels, beneath the fountain:

El, shrunk, is being lowered on a length of twine – through the slot in the doors – to the floor of the maintenance room.

EL: [looking around:] I think you’re right. If we can get the doors opened, the methane’ll blow right through the fountain. It’s the course of least resistance.

Outside the doors, Billy and Gloria are waiting. Billy looks at his watch, gives the doors a frustrated tug, then talks through the slot.

BILLY: [through mask:] El, what moves these doors?

EL: [from inside the fountain room:] What?

Billy lifts his mask and repeats the question.

BILLY: What moves these doors?

Inside the room, El, still on the twine, looks around.

EL: I’m still lookin’.

Outside the doors, Gloria shakes her head; Billy puts his mask back down then decides to say something else.

BILLY: [through mask:] Well, we’re getting a little short–

Billy breaks off and lifts his mask back up.

BILLY: [impatiently:] We’re getting a little short of time for the scenic tour, El.

Billy puts his mask back down.

Inside the room, El is now on the floor. He looks at the mechanisms above him.

EL: A couple of big motors – too big for me to start. The best I can do is short the locks.

El goes over to a pipe and leaps up to grab on.

Outside the doors, Billy slumps his forehead against the doors, impatient and feeling powerless.

Inside the room, El pulls himself up onto the pipe and then into a standing position, being careful to keep his balance. He leans over to the fusebox door and gives it a tug. It pops open with a quick snap and El almost loses his footing.

EL: Whoa!

========== 41:06 to 41:16 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

Johnny B and the kids are still hurrying through the tunnels to the exit.

JOHNNY B: Alright, shake it, we’re almost there.

Johnny B suddenly notices Gina’s absence.

JOHNNY B: Wait a minute, where’s Gina?

GIRL: [points behind them] Lookin’ for her bag.

JOHNNY B: You guys go ahead.

Johnny B heads back the way they came.

========== 41:16 to 41:23 ==========

exterior (nighttime) – city street:

2 fire trucks, sirens on, are heading for the museum.

========== 41:23 to 41:27 ==========

exterior (nighttime) – museum grounds:

At the sewer grate out front of the museum, the kids are climbing out. Nick helps Hilly up onto the ground.

NICK: [muttering:] Come on, let’s get outta here.

========== 41:27 to 42:09 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels, beneath the fountain:

At the fusebox, El lifts a pencil above his head and, using it like a pole to extend his reach, tries to flip the “door locks” switch. He misses on the first couple of tries but gets it on the third. With a grunt, he pushes it from “On” to “Off” – but the locks stay in place.

EL: [calls:] Give it a try, Glo, it won’t move.

Outside the doors, Billy tests them again – El’s right.

BILLY: [through mask:] They’re frozen.

Billy lifts his mask and turns to Gloria.

BILLY: It’s up to you, Glo.

Gloria nods and moves into position. Billy joins her, his mask back down. Gloria takes some deep breaths through her mask and tries her TK on the doors. When she doesn’t have any success at getting them to open, she quits, doubling over with the effort. Billy reacts with frustration – it has to work. He takes off his mask and helps Gloria stand back upright.

BILLY: Glo. Hey, don’t give up now.

Gloria nods, holding onto Billy for support.

BILLY: Okay? I know you can do it. Look, we’ll do it together, okay? Let’s give it a try. One more. Come on.

Billy puts his mask back on and heads back to the doors as Gloria prepares to try again.

========== 42:09 to 42:20 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

The timer counts down from “01:13” to “01:10”.

Johnny B, searching for Gina, coughs and turns a corner down another tunnel.

Meanwhile, in another area, Gina is semi-conscious on the floor.

========== 42:20 to 42:26 ==========

exterior (nighttime) – museum grounds:

The fire truck with Buchre and his henchmen arrives at the front entrance of the museum.

========== 42:26 to 42:53 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels, beneath the fountain:

Gloria pulls her mask off and concentrates her TK on the doors with fierce determination. Billy starts pushing on them with his shoulder, in tandem with Gloria’s pushing.

BILLY: [through mask:] Alright, they’re going.

Gloria keeps up her telekinetic push. With a long, reluctant screech, the doors finally, slowly, give way until they’re fully open. El waves from over by the fusebox.

EL: [calls:] Billy! Billy!

BILLY: [through mask:] Way to go, Glo.

Gloria smiles happily and she and Billy hurry through the doors. Billy grabs up El from off the pipe.

BILLY: [through mask:] Come on, let’s go.

Billy and Gloria sprint up some nearby stairs that lead outside to the fountain.

========== 42:53 to 43:09 ==========

exterior (nighttime) – museum grounds:

Buchre and his henchmen exit their fire truck and head into the museum.

Over by the fountain, a hatch opens and Billy pops his head out. He takes off his mask and looks around. Gloria climbs up and out, taking off her mask. Billy follows and catches her arm.

BILLY: Hang on, hang on. Look, I got one last little detail to take care of. You go on. [pushes Gloria to go] Take off, get outta here!

Gloria heads off and Billy hurries toward the entrance to the museum.

========== 43:09 to 44:09 ==========

interior – museum:

Arriving in the exhibit room, Buchre and his henchmen split up – Buchre going to the display cabinet with the tiara. Dick walks up, not suspecting the firemen he’s passing are imposters, and sees Buchre by the display cabinet. He stops and looks more closely, not sure what to make of this.

DICK: Wha–what are you doing, Al?

Buchre freezes in his attempt at forcing the lock.

BUCHRE: Richard.

Buchre lets his hands drop from the lock. Dick shakes his head in disgust as he realizes what Buchre is doing here.

DICK: [mostly to himself:] Foul play. Just what I needed.

Dick squeezes his eyes shut for a second, then looks back to Buchre.

DICK: Al, why? Why are you– Al, this belongs to you.

BUCHRE: As a matter of pure fact, my old darling, it belongs to the government for the next ninety-nine years, and I’m gonna be a little too frail to enjoy it by then.

Dick reacts.

BUCHRE: This way I get the jewels and the insurance now.

Buchre comes around the display cabinet, smoothly pulling a gun from his tux pocket. He stands in front of Dick, lazily brandishing the gun at him.

BUCHRE: You should have left with the others, Richard.

DICK: [wishing things hadn’t turned out like this] You’re going to regret this.

BUCHRE: Well, you’re gonna regret this more than I do.

DICK: Not really. [glances at his watch] I ju– I’ve called the police.

BUCHRE: [jeeringly:] And they’re gonna jump out of their hiding places and yell “Freeze”?

DICK: [weakly:] Hopefully.

Just then, Billy appears and levels a makeshift gun at Buchre.

BILLY: Freeze!

Dick reacts with a start; Buchre turns slowly to look at Billy, with the air of someone who can’t believe his scheme is sunk.

========== 44:09 to 45:53 ==========

interior – sewer tunnels:

The timer counts down from “00:13” to “00:11”.

Johnny B arrives where Gina is and sees her on the floor.

JOHNNY B: [with concern:] Gina!

Gina sits up groggily as Johnny B hurries over.

JOHNNY B: Gina, we gotta get outta here.

Johnny B helps Gina to stand.

JOHNNY B: Come on.

Gina clutches onto her purse (at least she was able to find it) as Johnny B picks her up in his arms. Not wasting even a second longer, Johnny B breaks into a speedrun, carrying Gina away from the danger.

The timer counts down from “00:02” to “00:00”.

An explosion goes off back in the tunnels where Johnny B and Gina just were. Johnny B pauses, hearing the sound, then goes right back into his speedrun. He zips through the tunnels at top speed, just ahead of the successive explosions that are occurring within the rest of the tunnels. Gina lets out a scream as Johnny B keeps up his speedrun – past the methane tanks, past the other timers – the flames from the explosions inches behind them.

exterior (nighttime) – museum grounds:

Outside the museum, Johnny B speedruns out of the hatch by the fountain. A split-second later, a giant fireball erupts out of the middle of the fountain, reaching high into the sky. Several explosions follow. Soon, the fireball calms down and the fountain is left on fire, with flaming pieces of debris around it.

Over by a picnic table, Johnny B and Gina stand up from crouching behind it. Gina clutches onto Johnny B and he puts his arm around her as they stare at the remains of the fountain – that was a narrow escape! Gloria joins them, and clutches onto Johnny B’s other arm. Billy, El (back to normal size), and Jane arrive next. Billy puts an arm around Jane as everybody absorbs the aftermath. After a moment, they all exchange amazed looks, laughing and hugging with relief. Billy reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out his remaining picnic tickets.

BILLY: Hey gang, you know, I think this is a good time to stop and–and reconsider the purchase of just a few more of these picnic tickets.

Billy, still talking, sits down at the picnic table; the others exchange “Not this again” glances and start leaving.

BILLY: You know, I think it would really help me out, and as I said, they’re only two-fifty apiece. And that does include the keg race in the–in the potato sack. And–and, you know, Billy’s been under a lot of pressure here, with this–this, uh, this mole monster thing, and I think Hawaii would be a great–would be a great release.

El is the last to go, throwing up his arms in a giving-up motion.

BILLY: And I got all Don Ho’s hits – I bought all of his greatest hits. And I love those–the–the drinks with the blue and yellow–the drinks with the little umbrella on top. And, I mean, uh, really, all considering, I–I–

Billy trails off, noticing how quiet it is, and looks behind him. Seeing that he’s been deserted, he throws the tickets on the table, gets up, grabs his gear, and trudges off with a last “Phooey” wave.

========== 45:53 to 47:46 ==========

interior – H.I.T lab:

In the lab, Johnny B tosses a basketball through the hoop on the wall, then walks over to El.

EL: [impatiently:] Come on, Billy, get with it!

El, wearing casual attire, is packing gear for the company picnic into a bag. Billy, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, is sitting down, looking glum.

BILLY: I just don’t understand it.

EL: Company picnic. Good times.

El tosses a ball at Billy, but it just bounces off of him because he’s too busy going over his woes to bother catching it.

BILLY: It just… seems so unfair. You know, I mean, I bought the shirt, you know, a–and I took the scuba lessons, and… I mean, I called everybody I know. I mean, everybody I ever heard of. And Miss Nance–

JOHNNY B: She’s got more friends than you, Hayes. Even I bought tickets from her.

Johnny B laughs as Billy looks confused.

BILLY: No, you bought tickets from me.

JOHNNY B: Yeah, only two.

Billy tries to reason this out, but El quickly steps in.

EL: Hey, hey, hey, uh… Where are the girls? [to Johnny B:] Uh, they’re late aren’t they?

JOHNNY B: They’re with my date.

EL: You have a date?

JOHNNY B: [proudly:] Yeaaah, Gina.

Billy gives a “What d’ya know?” expression. Just then, “the girls” (Jane and Gloria) arrive, making their excuses for being late – almost drowned out in the noise of Gina, Nick, Hilly, and Zack arriving with them.

GLORIA: We’re so sorry!

JANE: We would have been here sooner–

GLORIA: It’s been totally knockout crazy.

Gloria and Hilly are each carrying a picnic basket.

EL: We are ready.

JANE: Everybody, I would like you to meet our new director of Bounce Back, [points to Gina] an experimental project for street kids sponsored by [indicates herself] Social Services.

Jane claps and so do Gloria and Zack.

GLORIA: Alright.

El smiles as he and Johnny B clap also.

GINA: [smiling:] Hey, but you can broom the idea they’re sitting on us or anything. They gave us a house, a few more kids, and a fancy new name.

Billy nods, happy even through his glumness.

JANE: Basically they’re letting Gina run it in her own, um, [clears her throat] unique way.

Gina smiles.

JOHNNY B: Well, let’s grab this stuff and go hit some homeruns.

GLORIA: Right!

El grabs up the bag and heads for the door, where Nick reaches for it.

NICK: I’ll take that.

El lets Nick take the bag; Johnny B, carrying a bat and ball cap, playfully puts the cap on Zack as he passes him. Miss Nance comes in past everyone filing out and gives a lei to El. El takes it and puts it on as he leaves, followed by Johnny B and Gina arm-in-arm. Miss Nance joins Billy (who’s still sitting glumly) and takes off her sunglasses (there’s a 2nd pair in her hair).

MISS NANCE: Coming, Doctor Hayes?

Billy looks up and frowns, a thought occurring.

BILLY: Miss Nance… You wouldn’t consider taking me to Hawaii, would ya?

MISS NANCE: [apologetically:] Oh, sorry. I’m already taking Barry.

Billy nods – yeah, it was worth a try though.


Miss Nance puts her sunglasses back on and heads off. Billy starts to nod again, but stops as he realizes what she said.

BILLY: [to himself:] Barry and Herb? [calling after Miss Nance:] But there’re only two tickets.

Miss Nance keeps walking.

BILLY: Miss Nance? [realizes] Herb! The Invisible Man!

========== 47:46 to 48:25 ==========



  1. Thanks for posting this.
    I had a lot of fun reading the eps.

    You do a really great job =)

  2. You're welcome. Thanks for the compliment :)

    We are definitely planning on doing the rest of the transcripts, but unfortunately several things came up including family emergency, so the project is being pushed up a bit. It'll be great to get back into doing them, we may get 07 and 08 up by the end of the year if all goes well...


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